


Broken Vows

by KerryAnne



Series: Broken vows [2]
Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2003)
Genre: "Abuse of trust", "Child custody", "Counselling", "Dating again", "Divorce", "Domestic violence", "Marriage vows", "Mpreg", "Trust issues", "Violence", "abuse", "betrayal", "deception", "romance scammer", "secrets", "serial killers", "substance abuse", "tickling torture", "torture", "turtletots", Blood and Gore, Brothers, Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Family, Fluff, Hurt Leonardo, M/M, Marriage breakdown, Physical Abuse, Psychological Trauma, Quadriplegic, Raphael is a creep some of the time, Rebound romance, Turtlecest, first shell transplant operation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-01 08:04:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 36
Words: 66,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5198414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KerryAnne/pseuds/KerryAnne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raphael does the unthinkable and his and Leonardo's marriage is at a crossroads.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo realizes that Raph's been cheating on him when he staggers home drunk reeking of his "activities".

Leo is seventeen  
Raph is fifteen  
Don is fourteen  
Mikey is thirteen  
The babies are: three-year-old Leo jr, two-year-old Kane and one-month old Raphael jr.  
Raph and Leo have been married for four years. 

It was five p.m. on a Sunday. Leo was in the kitchen with his three children: Three-year-old Leo jr, Kane, who was two, and one-month old Raphael jr. The babies were fussing, as Leo tried to feed them their dinner. "Come on. Eat up and you can go watch TV," Leo said.  
"I want Daddy," Leo jr yelled, scrunching his face up and starting to bawl.  
"Only I'm here, Leo," his father said. "Come on. Just one more spoonful."  
"No!" Leo jr screamed, throwing his spoon at Kane, hitting him on the snout and making him cry. Leo leapt out of his seat and picked up Kane, cradling him to his chest. "Sh, Kane. It's okay. Don't cry." When the boy was finally calm, Leo set him back in his chair and tried again to get his kids to eat their dinner. Leo jr, as little as he was, folded his arms across his chest and stared at his father defiantly. "You definitely have your father's temper," Leo said. "Fine. Don't. Let's go watch TV." Raphael jr let out a squawk and Leo sighed in frustration, knowing the baby needed to be changed. There was just no peace for him. Damn it, Leo thought. Where the hell's Raphael? He said he'd be home two hours ago. Why do I have to do everything? 

"Daddy!" Kane said and pointed at his snout."I have a booboo!"  
"Hold on, Kane. I have to change your brother."  
"But, Daddy!"  
"Not now, Kane," Leo said and picked up the baby.  
But Kane was insistent and tugged on his leg. "Daddy, kiss it better."  
"Kane, enough. I need to..."

"Hey, Leo," Mikey said, entering the kitchen. Leo jr and Kane immediately ran to him and Mikey scooped them up into his strong arms. "How's it going?" Setting the kids back on the floor, Mikey said, "Are you okay, Leo? You're looking stressed, bro."  
"The kids are driving me demented."  
"I take it Raph's not here." The unspoken word 'again' hung in the air.  
"He said he was helping Casey at his workshop and would be home by five."  
"Uh huh. Didn't he say the same thing yesterday, bro?"  
"Casey's backed up at the shop, Mikey."  
"That's not Raph's problem. He should be here with you and the kids. It isn't fair that you're doing all the work."  
Raphael jr cried again. "I'm going to change the baby. Can you watch the kids, Mikey?"  
"Sure. I know it isn't my business, but Raph seems to be gone a lot, Leo. Do you think..."Mikey hesitated.  
"Think what?"  
"That Raph's lying to you about his whereabouts."  
"Why would he lie to me?"  
"Nothing. Forget I said anything, dude."  
"I'm going to change the baby. We'll talk when I'm done."

XXXXX 

Mikey took the kids into the lounge, settled them in front of the TV and thought back to when he'd overheard Raphael on the phone in the garage the previous evening. "Yeah," Raphael had said. "Tomorrow at one's good. Ya want me ta bring anythin'? Oh. Ya want that, do ya?" Raphael asked in a seductive tone. "I'll definitely bring that. Gotta go. See ya." I think Raph's cheating on Leo, Mikey thought. But how do I tell him? Or is it best I let Raph tell him? 

Leo returned a while later, sat down on the couch beside Mikey and said, "So, about Raph?"  
"Nothing, Leo. I'm sure he wouldn't lie to you." There's no way I'm going to tell Leo, Mikey thought. Raph needs to tell him if anything's going on. I shouldn't get involved.  
"Of course he wouldn't. Why would you think he would?"  
"I get the impression he isn't pulling his weight with you and the kids."  
"Well, he needed to get out after having Raph jr. He's hardly been out for four years and stayed with the kids. I don't mind him going out."  
"If it were me, bro, I'd smack Raph over the head and tell him to get his damn butt home. You're too patient with him, Leo, and he's taking advantage of you. You're tired and you shouldn't be doing everything alone."  
"Maybe you're right. I am tired and it would be nice if I had help for a change. I'll talk to him when he gets home."

XXXX 

Meanwhile Raphael was lying in bed at his "pal" Jared's home. They'd hooked up the week before after meeting at a club. Raphael had said he was meeting Casey, but he'd gone to a club, bumped into the heavily tattooed and bearded biker and had gone home with him. "So," Jared said. "You up for round three?"  
"I'm always up for it," Raphael said huskily.

Panting heavily afterwards, Raphael said, "That was amazin'. Ya think we can do it again tomorrow?"  
"Do you think you can get away from your spouse?"  
"I'm sure I can," Raphael said, running his fingers down Jared's chest. "I'm the master of excuses. I barely see him these days. Just as well, because I'm bored shitless with the whole set-up."  
"I was the first time you cheated on him, wasn't I?"  
"Yeah. I never thought 'bout cheatin' until I met ya."  
"Do you regret it?"  
"Nope. Wish I'd done it with ya sober the first time though, so I could remember it. It musta been as great as the other times."  
"It was, but would you have screwed me if you'd been sober?"  
"I think so. We ain't had sex in weeks and I miss it. I'm lonely and starved for attention. It ain't right that Leo don't pay me no attention. It's babies this and babies that. Fuckin' dampener on everythin'. I'm fuckin' tired of it. And don't get me started on the nappies. It never ends. Our youngest never stops cryin' and the others are always screamin' and runnin' 'round like little imps. I can't hear myself think."

Raphael's T-phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID that said Leo, Raphael ignored it and turned the cell off. "Who was that, Raph?" Jared asked.  
"Can wait. Round four?"  
"Definitely."

XXXX 

Two rounds and a six pack later, Raphael sauntered home, feeling on top of the world. His needs had been met. Now all he wanted was a warm bed and sleep. Arriving home, the TV was on in the lounge and he found Leo waiting, arms crossed over his plastron. "You're late," Leo said coolly. "You said you'd be home at five, Raph."  
"What's the matter, Fearless? So I'm a little late," Raphael slurred, trying to move past him.  
"It's ten p.m., Raphael. Where the hell have you been?" Leo sniffed the air. "Is that..."  
"I had a little ta drink, Fearless. Can I go ta bed? Wanna join me?  
"That's not beer, I smell. It's..." The cold realization hit Leo like a ton of bricks and pain flickered on his face. "You've been with someone else. That's what I smell."  
"Maybe I have? So what? Ain't like ya pay me any attention, Leo. Ya ain't in weeks. I'm lonely."  
"So cheating's okay?"  
"Yer frigid, Leo, and don't meet my needs. I need ta get it from somewhere, right? I don't matter anymore. It's just the damn kids."

"Daddy!" Leo jr said, running into the lounge. "I want some water." Seeing Raphael, he lunged at his father, grabbing him by the legs, causing Raphael to fall and land on his butt. "Daddy!"  
"Leo, come with me," Leo said. "Raphael, you can sleep on the couch."

XXXX 

Leo picked up their son and went to his and Raphael's bedroom, tears streaming down his cheeks. I can't believe Raph cheated, he thought, as he settled Leo jr into bed with him. We made promises to each other to always be faithful. How could Raph do this to me and our family? Is it my fault? Am I a bad husband? Unable to sleep and his heart crushed, Leo tossed and turned all night.

xxxx 

Raphael staggered to the couch and plopped on it, falling asleep in seconds, his loud snoring reverberating throughout the lair, unaware that his life was going to take a dramatic turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What will Leo do?


	2. Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Raphael talk about his behavior.

The house was eerily quiet when Raphael woke up the next morning. His head throbbed and he still felt a bit hungover. Sitting up, he rubbed his temple and moaned. Getting up, holding onto the couch to steady himself, he went to the bathroom, popped a pain pill and returned to the lounge. Where the shell's everyone? he wondered? 

XXXX 

Going into the kitchen, Raphael saw Leo nursing a cup of green tea and reading the paper. "Mornin' Leo," he said, bending down to kiss his cheek.  
Leo turned his head away and continued reading the paper. "Don't be like that, Leo," Raphael said, sitting down and reaching out for Leo's hand.   
"How the hell do you want me to be, Raphael?" Leo demanded, his eyes blazing. "You told me you slept with someone else and I don't satisfy you. And you arrive home reeking of beer and sex and our eldest saw you drunk. What do you want me to be? Overjoyed?"  
"I don't know what yer issue is. Can't we just talk..."  
"My issue is you, Raphael. You're the problem. Have there been others?"  
"One other guy. Look, it was just sex."   
"That's supposed to make me feel better? You're unbelievable, you know that? You promised to be faithful, Raphael."  
"Look, I'll make it up ta, Leo."  
"You got that right and I know how. I took the liberty of packing your things into boxes. Casey and April said you can stay with them."  
"Whoa. That's so...Ya don't mean that, Leo."  
"I do. It takes two to raise a family, but I've realized that I don't need you and I'm quite capable of looking after the kids on my own. It's not like you give a shit about them anyway. Were you aware of little Raphie feeling unwell the other day? I phoned you, but your cell was off. I thought you were maybe backed up at the shop, like you told me, and didn't want to be bothered, but I realize it was a lie."  
"Now wait a minute," Raphael snapped, his blood starting to boil. "I do love the kids. Are yaa callin' me a bad dad?"  
"You nailed it. That's what I'm doing. Casey will be here in ten minutes. You're a pathetic, terrible dad, Raphael."  
"But I said I was sorry, Leo. What do ya want from me?"  
"Maybe I could forgive you if it had been a one-time thing, but it wasn't, was it? And it was more than one guy. I'm done. Leave me the hell alone."  
"I still love ya, Leo."  
"Really? Got a twisted way of showing it, Raphael. What did you say last night? Oh, yes. I'm frigid and I don't meet your needs. Well, you don't meet mine, Raphael. I want a decent, loving, caring partner and you're not him."  
"What 'bout counsellin'?"  
"I'm not interested. Get fucking lost."  
'Ya were frigid, ya know. Ya ain't paid me attention in weeks. Six fuckin' weeks."  
"So? I have three small kids, who demand my attention. I'm run off my feet. Maybe you'd get some attention if you shared the load. Ever stopped to think about that? Of course not. You were thinking about yourself."  
"Look, Leo. I felt unloved and starved of affection."  
"Yawn. You have your right hand, Raphael. You didn't have to cheat. It's no damn excuse."  
"Ain't as satisfyin'. Where are the kids?"  
"Mikey took them out. Are you done with your little sob story?"  
"Sob story?" Raphael's golden eyes gleamed dangerously and he raised his fists to strike.  
"You want to hit me now, Raphael? Go ahead. That's a guaranteed way of getting me to forgive you," Leo said sarcastically. "You brought this on yourself. Now suffer the consequences."  
"What 'bout my parental rights?"  
"You're not fit to be a parent and I'm going to have sole custody, while you stay with April and Casey. You're welcome to visit the kids if they report that your behavior's improved."  
"And ya?"  
"Our marriage was a mistake."  
"Leo, I felt trapped, I needed ta be loved. We had the kids too young! I'm only fifteen and we already have three...."  
"I'm only seventeen, but you know what? I don't have a pity party. I deal with it and I take responsibility for my actions. We brought those kids into the world, Raphael. Caring for them is our job. No one else's. Dad had that chat with us when we started dating. Do you remember? You said you could handle no matter what happened and you loved me."  
"I do still love ya, Leo, but...."  
"It's not enough, Raphael. Nothing can fix this. You broke our sacred vows and I don't think I can find it in my heart to forgive you."  
"Do ya still love me?" Raphael asked, lowering his head in shame. For all his brazen behavior and excuses, Raphael did feel bad he'd hurt his mate.  
"Yes, but it's not enough."  
"So it's the end of us, Leo?"  
"That's right and the family have agreed that you'll be staying at April and Casey's. Permanently."

Casey entered the kitchen before Raphael could comment and said, "Hi, guys. Are you ready, Raph?"  
"I ain't gonna give up on ya, Leo. I know I said some harsh things and..."

"You can do whatever you want, Raphael," Leo said. "But I've given up on you and this sham of a marriage. But change your behavior if you want to see the kids. You're not sorry. You're just upset I know what you did. Excuse me. I'll be in my room."

"Way to go, Raph," Casey said. "You singlehandedly destroyed your marriage."  
"Shut up, Case," Raphael growled. "Ya think I don't know that?"  
"I've never seen Leo look so unhappy. You've really done it this time for him to kick you out."  
"I said shut it or do ya want my fist in yer damn mouth?"  
"Keep talking like that and you can forget staying at my place."  
"Sorry, Case. I'm just sad that it's come ta this. How could I have screwed up like this? Me and Leo were so happy."

Casey didn't answer and went to get Raphael's things. Raphael helped him and they loaded Raphael's boxes into the van. Then they went to Casey's apartment. 

XXXX 

Raphael settled in his new room. He called Leo's cell, but the phone was off, so he left a voice message. "Leo, I fucked up badly and I'm sorry. Please call me back. I wanna talk. I love ya."  
I made a mistake, Raphael thought. But I will fix it, even if I spend the rest of my life doin' it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can the couple salvage things?


	3. The encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heartbroken over Leo, Raphael goes on the rebound.

A week later, Raphael slouched on the couch at Casey and April's apartment, a beer in his hand, misery etched on his face. "Leo, still not answering, Raph?" Casey said from the opposite couch.   
"No. I've tried everythin' I can think of. I even suggested a romantic evenin' for two and there was still no answer. He means it. We're over."  
"Raph, it's only been a week. Give it time."  
"I'm gonna go out on patrol. I need somethin' ta take my mind offa things."  
"Want me to come with you?"  
"Nah. Ya got plans with Ape. I don't wanna spoil them. Go have fun, Case. I'll see ya later."  
"All right then. I'll see you later, Raph. You ready, April?"

"Coming," April called from the bedroom. She appeared a few minutes later with two suitcases, and said, "Raph, we'll be back a week from today. Are you going to be okay?"  
"Peachy."  
"Come on, Case. There's dinner in the oven, Raph."

"Thanks," Raphael said. "And for lettin' me stay here."  
"You're family, Raph," Casey said. "And it's going to work out with Leo. See you later."

xxxxxxx 

Raphael went to his room and pulled out a photo of Leo from under his pillow. Kissing it, he sighed heavily. Case is wrong, he thought. Leo hates me. Oh, Leo. How could I screw up things so? I need ta go out. I don't wanna think 'bout him. It hurts too much.

Raphael dressed in his standard trench coat and fedora and headed to the club. He wanted loud music and a drink. Anything to stop thinking.

xxxxxx 

Raphael went to the bar, ordered three rum and cokes, paid and headed to the back. He sat down, downed half of one and sat back in his chair, enjoying the alcohol coursing through his veins. I fuckin' needed this, he thought. The music was loud, techno, and he couldn't hear himself think. He'd started on the last drink when someone sat down next to him and said, "Hi there, stranger. Mind if I sit down."  
"Uh, hi," Raphael said. "No It's a free country."   
"Name's Tadhg. You come here often?"  
"What an original pickup line," Raphael said sarcastically. "Ya always try ta pick up strange reptiles, uh boys, uh men?"  
Tadhg laughed. "You didn't give your name?"  
"Raphael."  
"Why are you dressed in that getup? It's June. Aren't you hot?"  
Spurred on by the alcohol and drunk, Raphael couldn't help saying, "Ya wanna find out just how hot I can be? Bet ya'd love it."  
Tadhg grinned. "You're on. I don't live far from here. Twenty minutes walk tops."  
"My place is five minutes away. I'm ready when ya are." I know I shouldn't be doin' this if I wanna win Leo back, Raphael thought. But I don't wanna be alone tonight. I need closeness.

The night was humid as they made their way to April and Casey's apartment. 

XXXX 

Back at the apartment, Raphael pulled Tadhg close, smashing his mouth against his and leading him to the bedroom. 

xxxxx 

Clothes were shed, as they groped each other and Tadhg pushed Raphael down onto the bed. "You're really a reptile," he said.  
"That a problem?" Raphael asked.  
"Different, but I can live with it. You ready?"  
"No," Raphael said, flipping them, so he was top. "That ain't how it works."

Tadgh gave them a special "treat" afterwards and they fell asleep. 

Raphael woke up the next morning at seven to what sounded like Leo's voice. He opened his door, closed it and headed to the lounge. 

XXX 

Leo was seated on the couch. "Morning," Leo said politely.   
"Leo, yer here," Raphael said in amazement, golden eyes wide. "Can I get ya some tea? What would ya like?" Raphael added shyly, feeling butterflies in his stomach at seeing his ex-mate.  
"To talk."  
"Why are ya here so early and how'd ya get inside?"  
"Casey and April gave me a key."  
"So ya could come and check on me?"  
"Something like that. It a problem? Do you have something to hide?" Leo, asked, narrowing his eyes.

Before Raphael could answer, a naked Tadhg entered the lounge. Raphael couldn't meet Leo's eyes and looked at the floor. “Something wrong?” Tadhg asked, taking in Leo's presence. Leo laughed sarcastically and said, "No. Raphael, I see you've already moved on. I'm Leonardo."

Feeling extremely awkward, Raphael said, "Why don’t ya wait in the bedroom? I’ll be there soon." Tadhg did as he was told. "It's not serious," Raphael blurted out. "Leo, please believe me."  
Leo stood up, folded his arms across his plastron and gave Raphael his most withering look. "I came here to tell you that I'd talked to the family and they convinced me to give you another chance, but seeing this, it's clear you're not sorry for your earlier actions. I'm sorry I came. Have a nice life with him, Raphael."  
"Leo, wait," Raphael said, getting on his knees and looking up at him. "I'm sorry."  
"Goodbye, Raphael. And what's that white powder on your lip? I saw it earlier, but couldn't place it and now I...Damn you."  
"It's nothin' Leo. Please."  
"I disagree. I know what it is and you've just blown seeing your kids too. Goodbye."

Leo stalked out leaving Raphael in a flood of tears. Now I've gone and blown it for good, Raphael thought. I'm so fuckin' stupid. He slumped down onto the floor, his head in his hands and sobbed bitterly, knowing Leo was gone forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raph, what the heck are you thinking?


	4. Drowning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael falls further off of the wagon.

A month passed and it was now July. A heartbroken and rejected Raphael had spent all his free time with Tadhg drinking, partying and everything he could to dull the huge ache in his heart. Leo was gone and he'd never forgive him. He'd called Leo a bunch of times, but Leo had hung up every time. He'd ventured to go to the lair once, but Leo had blocked his path and had prevented him from entering. The family had stood behind Leo, supporting him. Raphael had stormed off and slunk back to Casey and April's apartment.

Casey and April had returned from their holiday, discovered Raphael and Tadhg making out on the sofa and that their lounge was a train wreck. Beer bottles, empty take-out cartons, papers and garbage were strewn on the floor and the apartment stank of smoke. That wasn't all they smelled. The pungent aroma of weed hung in the air and they could see packages containing white powder on the coffee table. And they could see Raphael's bloodshot eyes and dilated pupils. They'd demanded to know what was going on and once they knew, they'd reluctantly tossed Raphael out, reporting the on goings to Leo. Raphael had promptly moved in to Tadhg's run-down one-bedroomed pad, in a seedy area of the city, where he'd been ever since.

Tadhg was extremely different from Leo. He was aggressive, impatient, selfish, drank a lot and smoked, but Raphael was determined to make things work to spite Leo. One more than one occasion a drunken Raphael had called Leo, left a voice message and bragged, "He's so much better in bed than ya are." Tadgh had hit Raphael on a few occasions. The reptile had fought back, but he'd stopped after a while, because he felt inadequate, lost, his confidence had diminished and so had his pride and Tadgh did as he pleased. Raphael had definitely changed for the worse. He knew it, but he was too far gone to care. Nothing mattered. The only thing he cared about was getting his next fix. Tadhg was a member of a gang called the Irish skinheads. He recruited Raphael, telling him that they sold drugs to make a living and that was what Raphael would also do. Raphael did as he was told, becoming even more entangled.

Tadgh arrived home from his latest business transaction on July 16 and said, "Raphael, come here."  
"Comin', Raphael said, leaving the bedroom, where he'd been recovering from his hangover. 

XXXXX 

"What's up, Tadgh?" Raphael asked, entering the lounge.   
"We're moving to LA."  
"Why?"  
"My pal says it's awesome down there and is a new market. We can hang, deal and have fun in the sun. No more of this shitty city."  
"I don't know. My family's here."  
"I'm your family, Raphael. The only thing you have. Have you forgotten?"  
"No," Raphael said nervously, worried that Tadhg would strike him.  
"I could toss you out and abandon you like everyone else has done and then where would you be? A freak like you. Unwanted. I'm the only one, who wants you, Raphael, so don't fucking test my patience." Tadhg stood to his full height of six foot four and glared at him. Raphael was two inches taller, but the rage in Tadhg's eyes made him shiver and he nodded. "When we leavin'?"  
"Few hours. Start packing."  
"Ya know I'm sorry, right? Don't mean ta make ya mad."  
"Shut up and start packing."

xxxxxx 

They headed to LA a few hours later. Tadgh drove and Raphael slouched in the front passenger side, his eyes glazed over from the six pack he'd had earlier. "How much longer until we're there?" Raphael asked.  
"Probably four days or so. We'll have to stop multiple times to sleep, eat and rest and we can probably only travel at night thanks to you."  
"Ain't my fault I'm a mutant."  
"Do you want me to stop the car and belt you for talking back, Raphael?" Tadhg asked, a nasty glint in his eyes.  
"N-no. I'll just sit here and sleep."  
"Good. You know I love you, but you have to know your place. I'm in charge. Not you, Raphael. Got it?"  
"Understood. I won't forget."  
"You better not."  
"Tadhg, I love ya. Ya know that," Raphael said, placing a hand on his knee. "I'll behave."  
"Raphael's a dumb name. Your new name's Jake. It's edgier, cooler and more gangster like."  
"Whatever ya want, Tadhg."  
"Good. Now go to sleep, Jake."

xxxxx 

They stopped at a motel a few hours later and Raphael managed to sneak past the sleepy person at the front desk. Tadhg got a key and they went inside. "I'm going to take a quick walk," Tadhg said. "And get some food and disguises. You stay here, Jake."

Raphael waited until he'd gone and then placed a call to Leo. He was stunned when Leo picked up. "It's Raph, Leo," he said. "Can we talk?"  
"It's fucking three a.m.," Leo snapped.  
"I know. I wanted ta tell ya that Don came over yesterday and brought the papers ya wanted me ta sign, signifyin' our divorce."  
"Uh huh. And?"  
"I signed them and agreed ta the stipulation that I never see the kids. The papers are on the coffee table. Ya said it's best and yer right. I don't want them. You win, Leo."  
"It's for the best, Raphael. Now you're free to do as you wish and the kids won't be endangered. You can have a life of no responsibilities, just like you wanted."  
"Ya can have the cash in the safe and our other assets. I'm makin' plenty cash and will be fine."  
"I'm sure you will," Leo said sarcastically. "Just focus on what you do best. Looking after yourself."  
"I did love ya, Leo, and I miss ya. Would ya think 'bout takin' me back one day? Maybe we could try again."  
"No! Goodbye, Raphael. Enjoy your freedom!" Leo slammed down the phone.

Raphael looked at the phone sadly, picked up a bottle of vodka and took a long swig. Leo's right, he thought sadly. I ain't good enough for him and the kids. But I shouldn't think 'bout that. I have Tadhg and we're gonna make a great life together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is Raphael too far gone?


	5. New beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo tries online dating.

Leo was reeling after his phone call with Raphael. I honestly didn't think he'd sign the papers, he thought sadly. I kind of hoped he wouldn't and that he'd see sense, realize he's being destructive and heading down a dark path and get sober. If not for me, then for the kids. I guess we're truly over. Seeing his photos in the lair will hurt too much, so I'm getting rid of them and I'll say he died if the kids ask where he is. He has sort of died, hasn't he? It's better I say that, because fewer questions will be asked. Leo began boxing up photos of Raphael and himself together, their wedding albums, other photo albums, things Raphael had given him and vice versa, and stashed it all into a safe in his bedroom. Then he headed to the lounge. 

xxxxx 

Don was in the lounge and Leo said, "Are the kids still at April's?, Don?" "Yes. You've been looking stressed. We thought you needed a break."  
"Thanks. I spoke to Raphael."  
"And?"  
"He signed the papers. They're at the pad he shared with that guy."  
"I'm so sorry, Leo. Are you okay?"  
"Yeah. I'll be all right. Tons of people break up and cope, right? I will too."  
"Maybe Raph will come home."  
"He won't. We begged him to, urged him to get help and he rejected us. Raphael's gone forever and we have to accept it."  
"So you're giving up on him?" Don said angrily.  
"He gave up on all of us, Don. Don't twist it."  
"I still believe you could have worked on your marriage. He admitted he screwed up and wanted to fix things, Leo."  
"Only because he got caught out. I don't believe he was sincere. This break-up, although hurtful, is probably the best thing that could have happened, considering his behavior."  
Don sighed sadly and said, "I still have faith he'll come home."  
"I've removed his photos from my bedroom and all of the mementos linked to him and have boxed them up. I'll be doing the same with the other photos of him around the lair. He doesn't exist and I'll tell my children he died if they ask. It's best."  
"What?" Don yelled. "You're erasing him? Just like that? He's still our damn brother, Leo. You can't do that!"  
"I am and you'll listen, given that I'm the leader. My word's final. And no ne will speak about him ever."  
"You're making a huge mistake, Leo. The kids will ask questions and resent you when they learn the truth. I'm damn disgusted. He's still our brother and he...."  
"Silence!" Leo growled. "That's what I want. Inform Mikey."  
"What else did Raph say?"  
"it doesn't matter."  
"How did he sound?"  
"Actually quite sober and rational. Excuse me. I have some things to do."

xxxxx 

Leo went into his bedroom, switched on his laptop and logged onto a dating site. Raphael was able to move on and so can I, he thought. He created a profile. Then he shut down the laptop and went for a snooze. 

xxxxx 

Meanwhile, Mikey had arrived home. He'd been out buying the groceries. He and Don were talking in Don's lab. "So," Don said. "Leo doesn't want any trace of Raph around the lair and is going to tell the kids he died."  
"I don't blame Leo, bro. Raph's been a selfish asshole."  
"So you're taking Leo's side?" Don demanded.  
"Yeah. Leo's hurting, Don. Do you hear him at night? I do. He often cries."  
"So's Raph. He's not the monster he's been portrayed as."  
"I don't agree, dude. He's drinking, drugging, he cheated on Leo and abandoned his family and while I love him as a brother, he's lost my respect. I support Leo's decision one hundred percent. Raph doesn't deserve to be a part of this family."  
"Well, I'll never give up on Raph."  
"Suit yourself, but I've read stories about addicts like Raph. They rarely recover. Leo was sparing his kids more heartbreak."  
"Mikey, they can recover with lots of support and love."  
"Raph doesn't want that. You heard what he told us, dude. 'To fuck off, leave him alone and that it's his life.' Well, he's got his wish. He can screw up all he wants now without us nagging him."  
"I honestly believe the guy he's seeing is influencing him and got him hooked on the drugs and that bad lifestyle. Raph would never have done it otherwise."  
"Now you're making excuses for Raph? Come on. You know he'd never let anyone make him do something he didn't want to do. Raph's brash and macho. He's not a wimp."  
"You weren't there when I delivered the papers. That horrible Tadhg was hovering when I spoke to Raph and it was obvious Raph was scared of him."  
"Raph scared?" Mikey said scornfully. "Doubt it."  
"But he was so nervous, Mikey. I've never seen him like that. It was like looking at a wounded puppy. I noticed he had a real shiner under his left eye and I asked him what happened in front of that creep."  
"Maybe Raph got into a fight."  
"Yeah. With Tadhg's fists. I also believe he's being emotionally and mentally abused."  
"What did Raph say?"  
"He bumped into a wall or something. I didn't buy it."  
"I do. Raph would NEVER be a domestic abuse victim, Don. Look at him. He's six foot six and all muscle and aggression."  
"Victims come in all shapes and forms, Mikey  
"Maybe, but I don't believe Raph's being abused, bro. He's voluntarily doing all those things and we're better off without him. I'm going to start dinner."

Don angrily dug his nails into his palms and thought, why the hell is everyone giving up on Raph so easily? You never give up on family, no matter what they've done. He dialled Raphael's number and got "This phone number is no longer in use."  
"Fuck!" Don said through clenched teeth. "He's deactivated the number, so we can't trace him. "Raph, what the hell are you doing? Where are you? How the hell am I going to find him now?"

xxxx 

Leo's phone dinged in his bedroom, signifying that he had a message. Leo sleepily got up, flipped open his phone and saw he had a new email message. His eyes widened in surprise. Then his face lit up. Someone liked my profile and wanted to meet, he thought. Wow. This guy's hot with his dark eyes and dark hair. Leo typed a message, "Hey, Brennan. I just got your message. When do you want to meet?"  
"How about tomorrow night? Is Italian okay?"  
"Perfect. What time? Where?"  
"La Bianca. Do you know where that is?"  
"Yes. Meet you then. By the way, that blond guy in the photo isn't me, Brennan. I'm a turtle. I didn't intend on deceiving anyone, but I didn't think anyone would like my profile if I used my real photo. I understand if you don't want to meet me."  
"Send me your real photo then." Leo sent one. "You should have used this one, Leo. You're kind of cute."  
"I am?"  
"You are. I'll see you at eight tomorrow."  
"I'll be wearing jeans and a mask of that blond guy."  
"Cool. See you then, Leo."

Yahoo. I have a date, Leo thought excitedly. I can't believe I have a date. See, Raphael. You aren't the only one, who can get a date! Leo went to the lounge, but no one was there, so he went into the kitchen, hoping that Mikey was home, so he could tell him his news. 

xxxxx 

Mikey was preparing dinner. "Hey, Mikey," he said. Then he picked up a piece of raw carrot and chomped on it.  
"Hi. You look happy, bro."  
"Got a date tomorrow."  
"Leo, no offence, but don't you think you're rushing things? You and Raph have only been apart for a month."  
"So what? He's already moved on. Why can't I?"  
"I don't want to see you hurt again."  
"Maybe I won't be. Maybe this guy will be different, Mikey. Anyway, I'm going to meet him, no matter what anyone says."  
"Leo, be careful. Jumping into a relationship so fast could be disastrous."  
"I'm having dinner with him, Mikey. That's all. What are you making?"  
"Chicken stirfry. So, what's this guy like?"  
"His name's Brennan. He's tall, dark haired and dark eyed and he's a banker. His interests are similar to mine and he sounds cool."  
"How old?"  
"Nineteen. Did I mention how hot he is? He wants to meet for dinner tomorrow night. I won't rush things, Mikey, but I need to meet people. I refuse to sit at home for the rest of my life. You don't see Raphael doing that, do you?"  
"Are you going out with this guy to spite Raph?"  
"No. I like the sound of Brennan."  
"Does he know you're a turtle?"  
"Yes. And he's cool with it."  
"All right, Leo. I trust your judgement. Have fun."

Little was said for the rest of the evening and the family had a quiet dinner. April said she'd bring the kids by in the morning. 

xxxx 

The next evening, the July 17, Leo dressed for his date. His kids were in bed and Mikey and Don were in the kitchen. "Going somewhere, my son?" Splinter asked, seeing Leo about to exit the lair. "Got a date, Dad."  
"So soon after Raphael?"  
"I need to get out, Dad."  
"I understand, my son, but I worry that you're jumping into things so soon. You're still grieving about Raphael."  
"I'm over him, Dad, and I don't want his name mentioned in this household."  
"Is that wise? He is still the children's father and they deserve to know about him."  
"He's dead to them and to me, Dad. That's my wish. I thought you supported me in this."  
"I do support you, Leonardo, but I also can't help thinking you're being rather rash. What if Raphael sobered up and came home?"  
"It's too late, Dad. I want nothing to do with him. Now I'm going out."  
"My son, I will honor your wishes, but I will also pray that Raphael comes home and you two patch things up. He is also my son and I still love him."  
"See you later, Dad."

xxxxx 

Leo hurried to La Bianca, got a table and sat down. Brennan arrived a few minutes later. "You're taller than I thought," Brennan said and smiled. "I thought you were about five foot five, Leo."  
"Hah. I'm six foot four. I'm the tallest."  
"You mean there are others like you?" The waitress came over and they placed their orders.  
"I have two brothers." No need mentioning Raphael, Leo thought. "Don and Mikey. I'm seventeen and am the eldest. Then there's Don, who's fourteen. Mikey's the baby and is thirteen. You have siblings?"  
"A brother named Ryan. He's twenty-two. So, what does a seventeen-year-old turtle do for fun?"  
"Same things other teenagers do, except go to clubs and stuff. I love music, movies, walks, museums, reading and spending time with my family and kids. You?"  
"Pretty much the same. Do you have kids?"  
"Three," Leo said. He pulled out a photo from his wallet and handed it to Brennan.  
"Adorable, but who's the guy in the photo with them?"  
Shit. I forgot I still had photos of Raphael in my wallet, Leo thought. "That's my ex, Raphael. And those are Leo jr, Kane and Raph jr. Leo's three, Kane's two and Raphie's two-months old."  
"Your ex? Ex-boyfriend?"  
"Husband. Well, the church wouldn't marry us, because we're mutant turtles, but we had a ceremony at home and we regarded ourselves as married. Got married when I was thirteen."  
"Rather young."  
"Sure, but our species do that even at six-years-old."  
"And how is Raphael? I mean, has he handled the break-up fine?"  
"Yes. Perfectly well. He wanted a life with no responsibilities, so I gave it to him. He doesn't want any involvement with the kids."  
"It must be hard for you handling them alone."  
"I have help from my father and brothers. It's for the best."  
"Perhaps Raphael will change his mind one day."  
"Maybe, but I won't. Raphael's a danger to the kids and he's involved in nefarious things. Substance abuse. I didn't want my kids to be around that."  
"I'm so sorry, Leo."  
"So am I, but what can I do? Raphael's made his bed and now he lies in it."  
"Does he at least pay maintenance? I mean, I don't know how the divorce thing works with turtles."  
"He pays nothing and does nothing for them. I wouldn't want him to. I'm capable of looking after my family. We aren't rich, but we do okay."  
"I didn't mean to pry."  
"It's fine. Have you been married?"  
"Nope. I haven't met anyone I'd like to settle down with yet."

Their food arrived and over the next few hours, they found they had tons in common. Brennan was funny, smart and laid-back and Leo really enjoyed himself. 

XXXX 

They went for a walk in Central Park after dinner and ate ice creams and chatted. When midnight struck, Leo said, "I better get home. Thank you for a wonderful evening, Brennan."  
"Thank you, Leo. I had a great time too. I'd love to do it again. When are you free?"  
"When does it suit you?"  
"Same time tomorrow? I'll call you to finalize plans."  
"It's a date," Leo said happily.  
Brennan smiled and said,"It is." Then he leaned closer and gently pressed his lips to Leo's. "Sorry if I'm being forward," he said, pulling away.  
Leo blushed. "No. I liked it."  
"So again?"  
In reply, Leo pulled him close, their mouths meeting in a passionate kiss that made Leo's heart flip. When they pulled away, Leo said breathlessly, "That was incredible. I'll see you tomorrow. Take care, Brennan."  
"You too, Leo."

Leo rushed home, still on cloud nine. Wow. Brennan was so fantastic. I've never met anyone like him. Wow. 

xxxxx 

Leo arrived home and was pleased that no one else was up. He headed to his room, quickly undressed and got into bed, a gentle smile on his lips. I can't wait to see him tomorrow, he thought. And he likes me too. Closing his eyes, Leo soon fell asleep, having the best sleep he'd had in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Brennan. He's a character I borrowed from a novel I'm writing and I think he's an all round great guy. Maybe what Leo needs?


	6. Making friends with the Mafia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael and Tadgh set up base in Watts and get involved with a wealthy crime family, the Monetti's. Monetti is a fictional character I created.

On the evening of July 20, Tadhg pulled into his friend's driveway in Watts. "We're here, Jake," he said.  
"Oh okay," Raphael said. "What time is it?"  
"Just after ten. Get the cases and come inside."  
"Whatever ya say."

Tadhg got out, rang the bell and grinned when the door opened a few minutes later, revealing his friend, Alex. They hugged one another and were chatting when Raphael brought the cases to the front door and set them down. "What's this?" Alex asked, raising his eyebrows.  
"This is Jake," Tadhg replied. "Jake, this is my friend, Alex."

Raphael starred at the heavily tattooed skinhead, stuck out a hand and said, "Hi."  
Alex ignored it and said, "What is it, Tadhg?"

"I'll tell you when we're inside," Tadhg said. "Jake, bring the cases."

xxxxx 

They all went inside and Raphael wearily dumped the cases onto the lounge floor. "Is it a turtle, Tadhg?" Alex asked.  
"Yeah. Look, I know he's ugly, but he's been a good recruit and has helped make tons of cash. You can trust him."

"I ain't ugly," Raphael said angrily. Tadhg glared at him and Raphael quickly lowered his eyes to the floor.  
"Hungry?" Alex asked. Tadhg and Raphael both nodded. "There's a bed made up for you in the spare bedroom. Take your bags and settle in. I'll get your dinner."

xxxx 

Tadgh and Raphael settled into their room. Hurt by Tadgh's insults earlier, Raphael said, "Do ya love me. Tadhg?"  
'What kind of a question is that, Jake?"  
"Ya called me ugly. Am I really ugly ta ya?"  
"Come on, Jake. You're no beauty. Even you have to realize that. You're a freak."  
"Leo loved me."  
"Your family gave up on you, Jake. Don't you remember? I'm the only one, who hasn't, so of course I love you. Now shut up and hang up those clothes." Raphael did as he was told, but his heart ached for Leo. I miss him. I miss him so damn much, he thought.  
Tadhg turned on the TV and growled when he saw his face on the evening news."Fuck! Fuck Fuck!"  
"What?" Raphael asked.  
"Shut up. I'm listening."  
Raphael also watched and his jaw dropped. "Ya wanted ta move here, because ya killed a man and his kid when robbin' a convenience store. That's why, ain't it?"  
"Shut up, Jake. I need ta think."  
"But it is, ain't it?"  
Tadhg nodded. "It was an accident. Oh, fuck."  
"How can ya accidentally kill someone? Did he accidentally get in the way of yer gun?" Raphael asked sarcastically.  
Tadhg's eyes blazed and he lunged at Raphael, hitting him until the turtle lay still on the floor, groaning in pain. "I warned you to shut it, Jake. I don't need your crap. When you're ready, come for dinner, but don't fucking test my patience. I'm not going to stand for it." Tadhg stormed out of the room and went to join Alex in the kitchen. 

Raphael lay still for a long time. Then he gingerly got up, but still moaned. I think he's broken a couple of ribs, Raphael thought. His face hurt and he forced himself to look in the mirror, gasping at the sight: A split lip and two puffy eyes with the making of what he knew would be huge shiners. Fuck. I'm gonna look like a raccoon, he thought. Tadhg's right. How could anyone love a monster like me? Shit. Maybe I deserve what I'm gettin'. Yeah. I do. I'm a worthless asshole. Maybe he'll forgive me if I apologize ta him. I'll do that. 

xxxxxx 

Raphael went into the lounge and saw Tadhg and Alex on the sofa eating left-over Chinese food. "Well, look what the cat dragged in," Alex said snidely.  
"I wanted ta apologize for upsettin' ya, Tadhg," Raphael said. "And I'd like ta make it up ta ya."

"Is that so?" Tadhg asked, a nasty glint in his eyes.  
"Yeah," Raphael said. "I know ya love me and I was wrong."  
"Kneel."  
"Huh?"  
"You heard me. Kneel. Blow me. Then do the same to Alex."  
Raphael dropped to his knees and did as he was told. Then he did the same for Alex. When he was done, he said, "Ya forgive me now, Tadhg?"  
Tadhg lifted up his knee and rammed it into Raphael's plastron, causing him to fall backwards. "Yeah, you stupid reptile. Don't do it again! Your dinner's in the kitchen."

xxxxx 

Raphael went into the kitchen, warmed the food and ate, standing up. Man, I miss Leo, he thought. I had everythin' and now what do I got? Nothin'. But I may as well face it. This is my life forever. Ain't nothin' I can do 'bout it.

xxxx 

Raphael and Tadhg went to their bedroom a couple of hours later and Tadgh demanded attention. Raphael was left to his own devices afterwards, but too exhausted both physically and emotionally to do anything, all he craved was sleep. 

The next morning, while Raphael and Tadhg wolfed down breakfast, Alex said, "The Monetti's want us to conduct a business deal, Tadhg. You interested?"  
"I have to stay out of the press's eyes, Alex. I'm a wanted man."

"Who are the Monetti's?" Raphael dared to ask.  
Tadhg glowered at him, but said, "They're a ruthless crime family and are well known throughout the States, running all of kinds of businesses, including drugs, prostitution and extortion. What does he want us to do, Alex?"

"Guy wants us to meet him at his bachelor pad in Santa Monica, get the loot, drive back here, make the transaction and give him the cash back at his house. We get forty percent of two hundred thousand dollars. You in, Tadhg?"  
"I'm in."

"I don't know," Raphael said. "What if Tadhg's recognized? I don't want him ta be arrested."  
"He won't be," Alex said. "Things will be fine. Trust me. I've done this billions of times with Monetti and his associates. Piece of cake."  
"All right. The money will come in handy. We could use it, go ta Mexico, Tadhg, and retire. What do ya say?"

"Maybe," Tadhg said. "But you need to prove your loyalty to me first, shellback. Tell Monetti we're in, Alex."

Alex pulled out a cell and made a call. Then he disconnected the call and said, "All set. Use the day to rest. It's going to be a long night."

xxxxx 

Raphael and Tadhg went to their bedroom. "This is the last deal, ain't it, Tadhg?" Raphael asked. "This and we'll go ta Mexico. Ya said we would." Tadhg took out a bag of white powder from his shoulder bag, set it on the desk and snorted it up. "Ah. Much better," he said, feeling its effects. Go on, Jake. Have a long, deep sniff."  
Raphael did, loving the rush it gave him. "So, Mexico," he said.  
"We'll see. Like I said, prove your loyalty to me."  
"Ya know I will.

They met Monetti at his Santa Monica pad later that evening, took the briefcase containing the "goods" and headed back to Watts, stopping at the house of Moses Majola, a Xhosa man from South Africa, who'd set up a thriving drug trade. “So,” Alex said. “Jake, I want you to take the package to Majola. It’s simple. You knock on his door, hand him the briefcase and go inside with him. He’ll empty it and fill it with cash. You count it. He’s supposed to give you two hundred thousand dollars. You leave with the briefcase if it's all there." "If it ain't?" Raphael asked. "Then you shoot him.”  
“I don't wanna kill anyone," Raphael said in horror "Please. I'm scared."  
"Bless," Alex scoffed. "The kid's terrified. Cut the crap and do what we tell you.”  
“But I don’t wanna kill anyone.”

“Definitely pathetic,” Tadhg said. “Fucking stop the shit, Jake. You go in there, otherwise I’ll shoot you. Got it?”  
Alex sighed. “I honestly don’t know what Tadhg sees in you. I’ll come inside with you, but you’re on your own next time. Count the money and tell me it’s all there. Can you follow that fucking simple instruction?”

Raphael nodded. “No one will get hurt, right?”  
“As long as they haven’t double-crossed," Alex said. "Now move. Tadhg, you wait here."

xxxxxx 

Raphael swallowed hard and went with Alex, who knocked on the door. It opened and a tall, dark and curly haired man stepped out. “Mr. Majola?”  
Alex said. “I am. You must be Alex Kinsella and this is?”  
“One of Mr. Monetti’s new recruits. I can’t understand why, because he has zero up there. Isn’t that, right, Jake?”

Raphael knew better than to answer and studied the ground. “I thought only you were coming, Mr. Kinsella,” Majola said.  
“Kid’s initiation and Mr. Monetti said you always have your body guard. Anyway, shall we go inside and get down to business.” 

xxxxxx 

They went inside and Raphael and Alex saw a stocky, tall man. “My bodyguard, Sipho,” Majola said. He opened the briefcase. “Exactly what I want. I’ll go into my room and get the cash. Fumana, Sipho. Now.

“He wants ta get rid of us, Alex,” Raphael said. “Fumana's Xhosa for get rid of them.”  
“Is that so?”

Sipho had pulled his gun from his holster and was about to press the trigger when a gunshot rang out and he fell back dead on the ground, blood gushing out of the wound and forming a pool around him. Tadhg stood in the doorway, gun in his hand. “Just as well I came to check on you two,” he said. 

“Oh, shit. Is he dead, Tadhg?” Raphael asked.  
“I would think so. Find find Majola and get rid of him.”  
“But I don’t wanna kill him.”  
“He’s a fucking witness. Take this gun and do as I tell you.” 

xxxxx 

Raphael reluctantly took the gun and went into the master bedroom. “Where are ya, ya fucker?” he said. “I can hear yer breathin'.” He heard whimpering, which sounded like it was coming from under the bed. Raphael bent down and said, "I see ya. Get the fuck outta there. Now."  
Majola crawled out and got onto his knees. “Please don’t kill me, whatever you are. I have a wife and kids. Please, Mr turtle man. Spare my life."  
Raphael trained the gun on him. “Yeah? We have family too. Ya didn’t care and were prepared ta blow us away.”  
“I’m really sorry,” Majola wailed. “Please don’t kill me. My little girl is only six weeks old.”  
Raphael looked at the sobbing man and his heart went out to him. “I don’t wanna kill ya and leave yer kids fatherless, so I’ll let ya off this time."  
“Oh, thank you. You won’t be sorry.”

Tadhg stood in the doorway. “Why the fuck haven’t you killed him, Jake?”  
“He’s got a family, Alex. His kid’s only six weeks old.”  
“I fucking don’t care. He was going to kill us and you fucking feel sorry for him?” Tadhg pointed his gun at Majola’s temple, pressed the trigger and he fell back onto the floor. Brain matter and blood splashed onto the walls and the floor. Some of it landed on Tadhg and Raphael's clothing. Raphael stood frozen in shock. Then he said, “Ya didn’t have ta kill him. Ya coulda wounded him. He’d learned his lesson.”  
“Shut up. We have to go.”  
“Are we really gonna leave him here like this?” Raphael asked, looking at the corpse.  
Tadhg rifled through Majola’s pockets, withdrew a wad of cash and counted it. “Fucker was bluffing,” he said. “He didn’t have the money. Fucking two grand only. Fuck. Stop staring at him, Jake. He’s gone. Grab the briefcase and let’s go, before someone sees us.  
“But…” Raphael said.  
“Now!” 

Raphael looked at the corpse again. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’d have let ya live.” He grabbed the briefcase and followed Alex and Tadhg to the car. Then they headed to Monetti's pad. Raphael stared out of the window at nothing in particular, thinking about Majola and what had transpired that afternoon. He didn’t deserve ta die and had a wife and kids, Raphael thought. Tears ran down his cheeks. I don’t wanna be part of this, he thought. Oh, Leo. “You’re very quiet,” Alex said. “And I didn’t know you spoke that language.” “My brother's great at languages," Raphael said. "And taught me a bit of Xhosa. Anyway, he had a wife and kids. Ya didn't have ta kill him."  
“I did. He was a witness, you fool, and would have told the cops. It had to be done. Stop moping. You have to be tough if you want to survive in this business.”  
“I want out.”

"And then what will you do?" Tadhg asked. "You have no family. Only me. You know that, Jake, don't you?"  
"Yeah," Raphael said quietly, afraid the men would stop the car and hurt him for talking back. "Ya've made that point. I know this is my life. I'm sorry. I know how good ya've been ta me, Tadhg. It was just a shock seein' him die like that."  
"You'll get used to it. We have. Alex, how about burgers for dinner after Monetti? I'm starving."

"It's business," Alex said. "And if people get shot, that’s unfortunate, but if they double-cross us, they deserve it."  
"Exactly," Tadhg said. "I don’t like killing people, but I had to, otherwise both you and Alex would have died. Jake, I fucking saved you! Do you see that?"

"I said I get it," Raphael said. "I understand."  
"Good," Tadhg said. "Monetti's. Then dinner."

xxxxx 

They stopped at Monetti's pad and told him how they'd been double-crossed. Monetti stared at Raphael the entire time. "Are you really a reptile?" he asked.  
"I am."  
"Where the hell did you find him, Tadhg?"

"Long story."  
"Alex told me you're on the run from the law, Tadhg," Monetti said.  
"I am. Accidentally killed a guy and his son back in New York. I saw myself on the news."  
"You've always been like a son to me, Tadgh. You, Alex, and your scaly friend can stay here. I have two conditions."  
"Name them."  
"One that you no longer freelance. You lads all work for me."  
"Done and the other?"  
"That your scaly friend tells me where he comes from. Are there more of him? I'd love to meet them and learn about them."  
"He has three kids and an ex. And brothers."

"Not true," Raphael said quickly, distrustful of Monetti and worried about his family. "I signed the papers, but I got a text from a friend sayin' that the lair flooded and everyone died, includin' my two-month old son." Raphael choked back a sob. "Why my family? I had the sweetest kids." Damn. I hope my actin' worked, he thought. "There's only me left."

"I'm sorry for your loss," Monetti said. "Shall we have dinner? Jake, you can tell me more about yourself tomorrow when you've rested." 

xxxxx 

Over dinner, Monetti, Alex and Tadhg discussed how they'd avenge Mojola's backstabbing. Raphael was lost in his own thoughts. Look at me. I was once a crime fightin' ninja. Now I'm a lowly piece of shit, who works for the Mafia, he thought. I've sunk so low, I know I ain't gonna get outta it. Do I wanna get outta it? Yeah, but I like that powder. It makes me feel good and it numbs the pain. I need it. What pain, ya ask? The pain of causin' Leo and my innocent kids so much hurt. Then there's Tadhg. He ain't like anyone I ever met before and I know he means well. I just tend ta piss him off. I gotta behave and remember my status. He's boss. I ain't. I'm a freak, who's lucky ta have him. Raphael was obviously confused, the the drugs messing with his mind and his system and Tadgh had certainly also done a number on him emotionally, physically and mentally. Nah. This is my life and it's the best I can hope for, Raphael thought. And I'll make Tadhg happy. We'll work out and go ta Mexico when we've made enough dough. Besides, my life ain't so bad, is it? I got Tadhg and all the powder I can hope for. Who needs Leo and his sanctimonious bullshit?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raphael has really entangled himself now.


	7. A backyard wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tadhg and Raphael tie the knot and the cops raid Monetti's place.

The next morning, July 22, Tadhg was up at six. Shaking a sleeping Raphael, he said, "Wake up. There's something I want to say."  
"What?" Raphael asked sleepily, sitting up and rubbing his eyes.  
"I realize I've been a bit of a jerk."  
"No. Ya've been wonderful ta me. I'm very lucky ta have ya."  
"You think so?"  
"Very. Everyone else gave up on me, but ya didn't."  
"That's right. So," Tadhg said, sitting down and grabbing Raphael's hands in his. "Let's make it official. I know we can't have a proper ceremony, because you're a freak, but we can have one in the backyard and it'll mean something to us."  
"It..."  
"You don't want to, Jake?"  
"I just got a divorce. It feels so rushed.  
"So what?"  
"I thought we were..."  
"Look, reptile. No one else would want you. You said so yourself and you'll never find anyone like me, so why hesitate? I'm what you want and need. Someone to keep you, a worthless gnat in line. And remove that damn bandana. You look dumb with it. I'll kick you out if you don't marry me and then you'll have no where to go. Would you like me to do that, freak?"  
Raphael removed his bandana and set it on the beside table. "No," he said softly. "I love ya, Tadhg, and nothin' would make me happier than bein' yer mate."  
"Good. We'll do it later today. Want some powder to celebrate?" Raphael nodded and they snorted lines, enjoying the rush. Afterwards, Tadhg demanded some attention. Thrusting brutally into Raphael, Raphael let out a yell. "You like that, shitface?" Tadhg asked. "Admit it. You like pain?" He bit down into Raphael's shoulder and neck, watching; as blood soon oozed out of it, dripping down onto the bedsheet. "Yes," Raphael said, trying not to wince. "Don't stop. Don't stop."  
"Call me Master."  
"Master."  
"I won't stop. Believe me." Tadhg continued until he was exhausted. Then pulling out, he said, "I haven't finished, turtle." He got up, reached into one of his bags and took out a ball gag. After stuffing it into Raphael's mouth, he smiled, reached into the same bag and took out a whip. He beat Raphael until he was black and blue all over, ignoring his muffled shrieks. Then he bent down, removed the gag and smirked. "Like that, Jake, or should I say my slave?"  
"Yes, Master," Raphael said, blinking back tears.  
"Good. I'm going to shower. Clean yourself up."

Raphael stared at himself in the mirror by the bedside table. He had bruises and cuts everywhere and large red, angry marks on his shoulder and neck. The bruises under his eyes were now a deep shade of purple. Still, Raphael clung to the belief that Tadhg loved him. I know he loves me, Raphael thought. He wouldn't be with me if he didn't. And he's right. No one else would love me. I should be thankful for him and I am. I'm gonna make him so happy. 

xxxx 

Later that day, they had the ceremony in Monetti's backyard. It was simple with two gold rings, a barbecue and beer. As Tadhg slipped the ring, which was on a chain, around Raphael's neck, he whispered, "You're mine. I own you and don't you forget it."  
"Yes, Master," Raphael said. "I'm yers ta own and treat how ya wish." It had hardly been a romantic event, like it had been when he'd married Leo. Tadhg wasn't into that. 

xxxx 

The wedding night was just as rough as the morning had been. Tadhg dominating and laying into Raphael with a belt this time. "I saw you flirting with Monetti's son," Tadhg raged. "I saw it. You bastard."  
"Yer wrong," Raphael groaned. "All I did was say hi. I love ya, Tadhg. No one else."  
"You're talking back now, you wretched amphibian!"  
"I'm a reptile actually."  
"I'll teach you to talk back and flirt!" Tadhg yelled, thrashing him between the legs. "You really piss me off!" Raphael lay still, taking his "punishment", knowing things would be worse if he didn't. Tadhg hit him until he was exhausted. Then he snapped, "I'm going out. You better be ready for me when I come home. Clean yourself up. You look like shit." As a final insult, he smacked Raphael in the face and left. 

Raphael had lapsed into unconsciousness. In his dreams he and Leo were back together and blissfully happy, surrounded by their children and family.

Raphael was still out of it when cops raided the house in a drug bust. Gunfire erupted between the cops and the gangsters, resulting in multiple lives being lost, including Monetti's and his son. 

xxx 

The cops staked out the rooms and finding Raphael, a female cop called Rachael Lawson, said, "Look at that."  
"It's a turtle," Rachael's partner and boyfriend, Matthew Hunter, said.  
"So it appears. A giant turtle. It looks hurt, Matt."  
"I'll call it in."  
"Don't," Rachael said, laying a hand on his shoulder. "They'll treat it like a freak If you do and maybe experiment on it. We have to help it."  
"What do you suggest? Is it even alive?"  
Rachael checked Raphael's pulse. "Yes. Poor thing's been roughed up though. Look at those bruises. Matt, our place is a few blocks from here. We can take it there."  
"Yeah, but it's crawling with the guys out there. There’s no way we can distract them and get this thing out of here."  
"You're right. You go out to the guys. I'll stay here with this creature until the guys leave."  
"What if he wakes up and attacks you?"  
"I'll take that risk. Tell them I had to leave for a family emergency and I'll make it up."

Four hours passed and the cops, including Matthew, finally left the scene. The bodies had all been moved. Matthew phoned Rachael and said, "Guys have gone. I'll come back and help you move it. Has it woken up?"  
"Nope."

xxxx 

Matthew arrived back at Monetti's house and was going inside, when Tadhg arrived. "What the hell?" Tadhg said, storming up to the cop.  
"Who are you?" Matthew asked.  
"Name's Tadhg. Why are you here?"  
"There was a raid. Do you live here?"  
"Visitor. A raid, you say. What kind of raid?"  
Matthew peered at Tadgh a bit closer. Noticing his bloodshot eyes, he said, "Are you high, sir?"  
"Do I look high to you? Let me in. Is my spouse okay?"  
"Sir, I'm going to have to...."  
"Eat this," Tadhg said, removing a knife and slitting Matthew's throat before he could react. "I'm not high!" The officer fell back and was dead before he hit the pavement. Tadhg kicked him, tossed the knife into the bushes and went inside, yelling, "Jake!"

xxxx 

Hearing his shouting, Rachael ran to the lounge from where it was coming from, saw Tadhg and pointed her weapon at him. "Who are you?" she asked.  
"Tadhg. You?"  
"Officer Rachael Lawson. Do you live here?"  
"Visitor. Just arrived."  
"Are you friends with Mr. Monetti?"  
"I was. Why?"  
"Are you high?"  
"No. Where's my husband? I went out for some beer, came home and I can't find him. "Jake!"  
"What does he look like?"  
"Green."  
"In the bedroom. I'm afraid he's in bad shape."  
"Take me to him."

xxxx 

Rachael led Tadhg to the bedroom. "You stupid shit, Jake," Tadhg yelled. "Did you call the cops on this place? It was you, who called them, didn't you?" Tadhg lunged at Raphael, but Rachael was quicker and shot him in the leg, causing him to collapse on the floor, clutching his leg and shrieking in agony. Rachael's blood ran cold and a horrible thought came to her. "You hurt him, didn't you?" she said. "You hurt your husband?"  
"His fault," Tadhg yelled. "He was fucking flirting. I had to teach him a lesson." Suddenly realizing that she hadn't seen Matthew in a while, Rachael said, "Did you see a cop outside?"  
"No!"  
Rachael's gut told her that Tadhg was lying and she said, "You killed him, didn't you?"  
"I don't know what you're talking about. As for my husband, he smacks me around, so I retaliated this time."

Rachael called for backup and while she waited, she said, "You're going to spend a very long time in prison. As for your husband..."

"Tadhg," Raphael said weakly, opening his eyes. "Tadhg."  
"I'm here. You okay, Jake?"  
"Want ya. Come here."  
"I want to, but a bitch of a cop shot me in my leg."

"Are you okay?" Rachael asked, approaching Raphael's bedside.  
"Ya shot him?" Raphael demanded, glaring at her. "Why?"  
"He was going to hurt you."  
"Bullshit. Tadhg would NEVER hurt anyone. He loves me and I love him. He's never touched me."  
"Then who did this to you?"  
"Vincenzo Monetti and his son."  
"Were you and your husband involved in the drug dealing operations?"  
"Of course not. Me and Tadgh just arrived and Monetti wanted ta sleep with me. I didn't wanna, he drugged me and did this ta me. Tadhg and me love each other so much. We tied the knot earlier today. Didn't we, Tadhg?"

"That's right," Tadhg said. "I love him with all my heart."  
"Then why were you upset that your husband may have called the cops?" Rachael asked.  
"Monetti's like a dad. I didn't want him to go to jail."  
It didn't sound right to Rachael, but she had no evidence to prove he was lying, so she simply said, "I would have thought you'd want revenge on the man, who hurt your husband."  
"Yeah, but I had my own ideas of revenge and now the cops have spoiled them."

The backup team arrived, saw Matthew's body, went into the room where Rachael, Raphael and Tadhg were and said, "Rach, I'm sorry to have to tell you, but Matthew was killed and he didn't make it."  
Rachael's heart sank and her eyes filled with tears. "He's gone?"

"Yes," a male cop said. "I'm so sorry, Rach, but we'll find, who it did."

"Wasn't me," Tadhg said. "But hope you find him."

"You look familiar," the male cop said.  
"Yeah," Tadhg said. "Been told I look a lot like Ben Affleck."  
"So, Rach. What did this guy do to get a sore leg?"

"He was going to hurt his husband," Rachael said. "And I shot him."

"Bullshit," Raphael said. "He wasn't gonna. He loves me." Raphael repeated the same spiel he'd given Rachael. The cop wasn't as bright as Rachael was and believed him.

The male cop peered at Tadhg's leg and said, "Flesh wound. You should be okay in a few hours. Just rest it. Looks like the bullet exited." He searched the room and found it under the bed. "Here it is," he said, picking it up and placing it into a Ziploc bag.  
"And Matthew's killer?"  
"We'll search the grounds and see if we can find anything."

"I wanna press charges for assault," Raphael said. "She attacked my husband."  
"Let's drop it," Tadhg said, fearful the cops would find out he was a wanted man. "Jake, you're fine. I'm fine and let's just leave it at that."  
"Ya sure?"  
"I am," Tadhg said, crawling over to Raphael and placing his hand in his. "I'll take care of you, okay?"  
"I trust ya."  
Tadhg shot a nasty look at Rachael and said, "You can leave now. You've caused enough shit."

"Can I have a word alone with your husband?" Rachael asked.  
Tadhg dragged himself up with great effort and hopping on one leg to the door, he said, "You have five minutes. Then I want to sleep."

When he'd left, Rachael gave her most winning smile. "Jake?" she said. "Can we talk?"  
"What 'bout?" Raphael asked.  
"I know you love your husband, but I want to ask you something. Has he ever hit you?"  
"No!"  
"Where do you come from, Jake? You're a giant turtle. Do you have family you want to call?"  
"No and tell yer cop pals not ta tell anyone 'bout me. I could be sent ta a lab or somethin' if ya do. I don't want that. All I want is ta live my life with Tadhg."  
"Okay. Are you sure he's not hitting you?"  
"How many fuckin' times do ya want me ta tell ya he ain't?" Raphael yelled. "He loves me and he never hurt me. It was Monetti. Ask him."  
"He's dead."  
"Good. The bastard hurt me and Tadhg. I ain't sorry he's dead. Can ya leave now? I wanna sleep."  
Rachael opened her purse and handed him a card. "I often help out at the shelter," she said. "Domestic abuse happens to victims of all shapes and sizes, Jake. If you want to talk, you can go there, call me or go to my place. My address is on the back. You don't have to be afraid. I can help you."  
"I'm fine," Raphael snapped. "Save yer worryin' for someone, who needs it, like maybe yer own family."  
"I don't have a family. Matthew was all I had and we couldn't have children."  
"Sorry for yer loss. Can ya go?"  
"Do you have children, Jake? You look young. Are you a teenager?"  
"I got three," Raphael blurted out. Then realizing his error, he scowled.  
"How old are they?"  
"Ya tryin' ta create a rapport with me now? Ain't gonna work."  
"Do you want to see your kids? Then leave this creep. Come talk to me. I'll help you. You aren't alone."  
"Get the hell out!"  
Raphael fingered the card when she'd left, a deep frown on his face. The kids. I do miss them, he thought. I have ta go. Maybe she can help me. But Tadhg will kill me if I leave. He'll kill me if I stay. What do I do? Can I trust her?

xxxx 

Rachael left with the other cops and Matthew's corpse. The cops had been unable to locate the murder weapon and they weren't looking into Tadhg or Raphael as members of Monetti's drug ring.

xxxx 

Tadhg went back into his and Raphael's bedroom. Raphael quickly put the card away in the drawer. "So, what did that bitch want?" Tadhg asked.  
"Nothin'."  
"Don't BS me, Jake. I can tell when you're lying," Tadhg said, lifting up Raphael's chin and staring into his golden eyes.  
"Me ta tell her ya beat me up. I said ya don't and that I love ya."  
"Don't ever forget that. I do love you. We need to leave when you're feeling better. I have a feeling that bitch is going to bug us."  
"That partner of hers. Do ya know what happened ta him?"  
"Killed him. He deserved it. Fucking asshole would have shot me. You going to rat me out?"  
"No. Yer family and family doesn't do that ta family. I love ya. Hey. I gotta go out for a while ta get some groceries."  
"Can you walk?"  
Raphael ached all over, but he'd come to a decision. He had to leave and he had to leave now or he never would. Except in maybe a box. And he wanted to see his kids and Leo. I have ta go, he thought. She said she could help. I'm gonna take a risk and trust her. I have problems and I need help. He forced a smile onto his face and said, "Yeah. Ya sleep, okay? I'll be back later." Raphael donned a disguise, his weapons, belt, gear and bandana, took out the card from the dresser, tucked it into his jeans, saw that Tadhg was fast asleep and left as fast as his sore body would allow him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tadgh and Raphael have a bonding ceremony.


	8. The arrest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael reaches out to Rachael and Tadhg's arrested.

Raphael reached Rachael's home a little before four a.m. Grimacing at the pain, he pressed the doorbell. She opened the door a minute later, peered out and said, "Can I help you?"  
"It's me," Raphael said, removing his hat. "Can I come in? Please. I ain't got anywhere ta go and ya said ya can help me."  
"Of course. Come in." 

xxxx 

Rachael showed him inside and said, "Please make yourself comfortable on the sofa. Can I get you anything?"  
"Water, please," Raphael said, staggering to a sofa and gently sitting down.  
"Would you like something to eat? I have some left over chicken."  
"Thanks. That'd be great." Rachael went to the kitchen and began to prepare his snack. Raphael gazed around the room, taking in the many photos on the wall of her and who he guessed had been her partner. They were smiling in every one and lovingly staring into each other's eyes. Obviously a very happy couple. Just like Leo and I were, Raphael thought despondently. Until I fucked things up. He pulled his wallet out from his jeans pocket, took out a photo of he, Leo, and the three kids and gently ran his thumb over it. Hot tears spilled down his cheeks and he angrily swiped them away with the back of his hand. I miss them, he thought. I gotta see them.

Rachael appeared with a glass of water and a plate of sandwiches. He quickly stuffed the photo back into his wallet and laced his fingers together. "Here you go, Jake," she said, handing him the food.  
"Thanks," Raphael said gratefully, taking it. "But the name ain't Jake. It's what he called me, because he didn't like my name."  
"Oh," Rachael said, sitting down on an armchair opposite him. "What's your real name?"  
"Raphael." He bit into the sandwich and attacked it, like he hadn't eaten in days.  
"Like the Renaissance painter. I'm Rachael."  
He nodded. "Yeah."  
"Are you as artistic as he was?"  
"I wouldn't call myself as talented, but I love drawin' and paintin'. Did a lot in my spare time. Kane liked copin' me." The thought of his son made his eyes fill with tears.  
"Who's Kane?"  
"One of my kids." Raphael took out the photo from his wallet and she stood up, went over and studied it. "That's him and those are Leo jr, Raphael jr and Leo. And that's me holdin' my namesake."  
"Gorgeous family, Raphael, and you and Leo look so in love."  
"We were. Got married really young. I was eleven and he was thirteen and the babies started comin' soon after, but we were very much in love and happy. As ya can see, Raphie and Kane look like me and Leo jr looks like Leo, but Leo jr has my temper."  
"How old are they? So you're fifteen now?"  
"Yeah. Leo jr's three, Kane's two and Raphie's two-months old." Raphael devoured the second sandwich. "This is really great. Thanks." Then he sipped his water.  
"You're welcome. How are you feeling?"  
"Pretty shitty actually. Hurts all over. Ya?"  
"I'll be all right. I'm glad you turned up. I didn't think you would. Many domestic abuse victims are too scared."  
Raphael swallowed hard. "I am, but I realized I had ta get outta there when ya asked 'bout the kids. I wanna see them again. Ya gave me the confidence ta leave. I left when Tadhg fell asleep."  
"Thanks, Raphael. If you're done, why don't you get some sleep? And we'll talk later."  
"I don't wanna be a nuisance ta ya, but I didn't have anywhere ta go and I couldn't just show up at the shelter lookin' like this."  
"It's fine. You can stay here as long as you like."  
"I'll go in a minute. I know who killed yer partner. Tadhg told me he did it. Knowin' him, he probably tossed the weapon into a bush or somethin'. He ain't that bright ta dump it elsewhere. And there's a reason why yer cop pal recognized him. Tadhg was on the news for killin' a man and his son back in New York. He has a long criminal record and has many aliases. Ya can find him on the police system under Tadhg Murphy. Now I'm tellin' ya this, but I can't testify in court. Do ya understand that? It ain't, because I wouldn't. I would in a heartbeat, as scared as I am of him, but because I'm a mutant. If people see me, I'll be hounded by everyone and possibly captured."  
"Your husband did that?" Rachael asked, her jaw dropping in shock.  
"Yeah. Tadhg's a badass and I was fuckin' dumb ta have got with him."  
"I have a way you can help me without revealing your identity. Call in anonymously to the police station."  
"Okay. I'll do it now."

Raphael picked up the phone and made the call. When he was done, he said, "I'm so sorry. I really am 'bout yer partner. I know how I'd feel if somethin' happened ta Leo."  
"It's okay, Raphael," Rachael said, fighting back tears. "Thank you for having the guts to come and tell me. Tadgh will be arrested and brought to justice."  
"I can't press charges against him either, ya understand? But at least he'll do time for murder."  
"Thank you, Raphael. I'm going to bed. Need some help getting to your room?" He nodded and she helped him to his room and into bed. 

xxxx 

Do you want a pain pill, Raphael?" Rachael asked.  
"No, thanks, Rachael. I'll be fine. Thanks for everythin'."  
"He's never going to hurt you again. He did, didn't he?"  
Raphael nodded. "Monetti never touched me. It was always Tadhg. I lost confidence when Leo and I split up and Tadhg took advantage of that, breakin' me down until I was weak and pathetic. It happened so fast, I didn't even know it was happenin'. It's my fault, though. I shoulda left the first time he smacked me."  
"Don't blame yourself, Raphael. People like Tadhg Murphy are master manipulators and you still being a bit naïve were in effect powerless against him, once he had control of you. Did Leo ever hit you?"  
"No. We argued, but it was never physical. Leo loved me and I loved. No. I love him. Real love. The kinda love that comes by once in a lifetime, like ya and yer partner."  
Rachael nodded sadly. "Matthew and I had immense love for one another and respect. He was my first and only love. Sleep well, Raphael. You're safe here. If you need anything, just call."  
"Thanks. Night."  
Raphael closed his eyes and for the first time in a long time, he slept soundly, knowing that he was safe and protected.

xxxx 

Meanwhile, Tadhg was still asleep, when the cops arrived at the Monetti house. Some searched the grounds, looking for the murder weapon, while others checked the rooms. Two men opened Tadhg's bedroom door and one said, as he pointed his gun at Tadgh, "Freeze and surrender."  
"What the fuck?" Tadhg asked, opening his eyes and gazing at them sleepily. "What the fuck is this?"  
"Tadhg Murphy, we want to take you down to the station for questioning in connection with the murder of Matthew Hunter and of Paul Stone and his son, Gary, back in New York."  
"You have the wrong person," Tadhg snapped. "This is insane. Waking an individual up in the middle of the night without any..."

"You were going to say proof?" another cop said, walking into the room and holding a Ziploc bag containing the knife. Tadhg's face paled. "I guess this is yours, Mr. Murphy. Arrest him."  
"It isn't fucking mine. You’ll see," Tadhg yelled, as he was forced into a sitting position, handcuffed and marched out of the room. "I want a damn lawyer. I know my rights." Tadhg was still screaming obscenities, as he was bundled into a van and driven to the police station.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter focuses on Raphael's recovery


	9. Reaching out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don and Mikey make plans to fetch Raph.

Raphael woke up at noon later that day, July 23, and looked next to him, sighing in relief when he saw he was alone. No Tadhg. I'm safe, he thought. I'm safe. He's in jail and he's gonna stay there. He got up slowly, still feeling sore, and padded to the bathroom, having a long, hot shower. The warm water cascaded over his skin, washing away dried blood and bits of skin. Raphael watched it go down the drain and shook his head sadly. How did I get ta be so desperate I stayed with a psycho, who used me as a punchin' bag, he thought? I used ta be so tough and full of attitude and that creep reduced me ta a tremblin' shadow of myself. He stepped out, towelled himself and studied his reflection in the mirror. The bruises under his eyes had gone down and were now yellow, but he still looked a mess. If my bros saw me now, they wouldn't believe it, he thought. Big, strong, Raphael, the victim of domestic abuse. Victim. Me. No. I ain't a victim. I'm a survivor. I got out. I'm one of the lucky ones and I have a chance ta get my life back on track. I'm gonna take it, get clean, go back home, make things right with Leo and see my babies. The thought of his sons made his eyes fill with tears and he angrily blinked them away. I'm gonna see them, he resolved.

There was a knock at his door and Rachael said, "Raphael, are you awake?"  
"Give me a minute. I'm comin'." Throwing on jeans and his trench coat, he went to the door and opened it. "Mornin'."  
"It's a little after noon. Aren't you hot in those clothes, Raphael?"  
"Ain't got anythin' else."  
"What size are you? Tell me and I'll get you some shorts and T's. You must be boiling."  
Raphael told her and added, "Thanks. I'll pay ya back."  
"I'm going out to get some groceries and I'll buy the clothes. Please make yourself at home."  
"Thank ya. Can I call my family?"  
"Of course you can. I'm sure they'd be delighted to hear from you."  
"Any word on Tadhg?"  
"They found the murder weapon, arrested him and charged him with the murders of Matthew and the people in New York. Is there anything else I can get you?"  
"Pizza. I've been cravin' pizza and beer."  
"You shouldn't have beer, Raphael, given what happened, but I'll gladly get the pizza."  
"And a couple of colorin' books and crayons."  
"For you?"  
"My sons. I wanna give them those when I see them. Oh, and if ya can, a little teddy bear for Raphie."  
"Of course. Anything else?"  
Raphael furrowed his brow in thought. "Some comics? I pretty much read anythin'."  
Rachael smiled. He was after all still a teenage boy, she thought. Of course he liked comics and pizza. "Okay."  
"Leo's favorite color's blue, so I was thinkin' a blue scarf for winter. His is old and rather tatty."  
"I'll get everything and will be home in a couple of hours. See you later."  
"Thanks."

xxxx 

Raphael went into the lounge, picked up the phone handset and made a call. "Hello," he said. "It's Raph. Don, is that ya?"  
"Raph? It's really you?" Don said in astonishment.  
"Yeah. It's me. How are ya?"  
"Good. How are you? It's so great hearing your voice, Raph."  
"Yers too. I missed ya. All of ya," Raphael said, choking back a sob.  
"We miss you, too, Raph. Where are you? Are you still with that slime ball?"  
"Cali and nope. We split. Long story. Is Leo home?"  
"Thank God. That guy was trash. You deserved far better and he gave me the creeps."  
"Is Leo there?"  
"Out."  
"How are my babies?"  
"Hear for yourself. Kane, here's your Daddy," Don said, passing the phone to Kane.

"Daddy," Kane said. "Daddy!"  
"Hi, buddy," Raphael said, tears falling down his cheeks. "How's my little man?"  
"Daddy."  
"That's right. It's me, honey, and I'm gonna come home soon. Is yer brother there?"  
"Daddy." Kane started babbling about a toy in his little sing-song voice.

"Want Daddy," Leo jr said, snatching the phone away from his brother. "Daddy."  
"Hey, Leo," Raphael said. "Ya okay, my little firecracker?"  
"Daddy, come home."  
"I will be soon, Leo. Ya can count on that. I love ya so much."  
"Love you, Daddy."

"Want Daddy," Kane yelled, smacking his brother over the head, trying to get the phone, and causing him to cry.  
"What's goin' on?" Raphael asked. 

Don soothed Leo jr and grabbed the phone away. "Raph, Kane hit Leo, because he wanted the phone and Leo cried. Just like you and Leo used to fight."  
Raphael chuckled. "Yeah. The good old days. Looks like Kane and Leo got my temper."  
"Yes. I'm sure there'll be many more fights. Never a quiet moment here. When are you coming home, Raph?"  
"I don't have any money or transportation, Don. I'm stayin' at a cop's house. She helped me leave Tadhg and has been really nice." A baby squawked and Don sighed. "Is that Raphie?" Raphael said.  
"Yes. He's been asleep in my lap and decided to wake up now. Figures," Don said, holding the phone to the baby's ear. "Talk to him, Raph."  
"My little angel. My sweet little boy. I love ya. Bet he don't understand."  
"He turned his head slightly, Raph. He recognizes your voice. So okay. Here's what's going to happen. Me and..."

Heavy footsteps entered the lounge. "Uncle Mikey!" Leo jr shouted, running over to him and quickly joined by Kane.

"Let me guess," Raphael said. "Mikey just got back, Don."  
"You called it. Mikey, Raph's on the phone."

Mikey's raised an eye ridge, gave his nephews the toy cars he'd bought for them and went over to Don. "I don't want to talk to Raph, Don," he said.  
"He's still your brother, Mikey. Show some compassion."  
"What compassion did he have for Leo?"

"I can hear ya, ya know that?" Raphael snapped. "Ya got somethin' ta say, say it ta me."  
"Okay," Mikey said, taking the phone from Don and saying, "You're a fucking asshole."

"Mikey, the babies can hear you," Don said. "Language. I don't want them talking like that!"

Mikey lowered his voice and said, "You're a disgrace, Raphael. Doing what you did to your family. A huge jerk. You put Leo through hell. Not to mention us. You have no right calling here."  
"Ya have every right ta be angry, Mikey, but I have every right ta call. They're still my kids. Mine."  
"No body wants you here, Raph. Why don't you crawl under a rock and die?"

"Mikey!" Don said crossly. "Raph's reaching out to us."  
"How convenient," Mikey said sarcastically. "When he wants to. Isn't that how it always is? It's always what Raphael wants. He doesn't care about anyone else."

Hot tears pricked Raphael's eyes and he said softly, "Yer wrong, Mikey. I do care deeply. I wanna come home and make things right. I'm so sorry. So sorry. I miss ya all so much." Raphael started to weep and Mikey's heart softened. He'd never heard his older, tough, strong brother cry before. It was unsettling and sad and Mikey regretted his harsh words. Something really bad must have happened for Raphael to sob. "Don't cry, Raph," Mikey said. "Please don't, bro. You're going to make me blubber. Where are you?"  
"Cali. I know I'm a piece of shit, Mikey. I've done so many bad things."  
"Me and Don are going to ask April if we can borrow her father's jet. Give us the address and we'll come pick you up."  
"Thank ya," Raphael said gratefully and gave the address.  
"We should be there by seven tonight."  
"What 'bout Leo? He's gonna be so mad."  
"Raph, you're our brother and you need to be with family. We love you. You're coming home, bro. Hang on till we get there. Leo has to accept that despite your differences, the lair's still your home and nothing will change that."  
"Love ya, Mikey, ya little knucklehead."  
"Love you too, Raph. See you soon."

Raphael disconnected the call and smiled for the first time in ages. I'm goin' home, he thought happily. I'm gonna see my babies and hug and kiss them.

Rachael arrived home a couple of hours later and Raphael told her about the phone call over lunch in the lounge. "That's wonderful, Raphael," she said.  
Raphael chewed a piece of pizza and said, "I can't wait ta hold my kids in my arms again. It's all thanks ta ya, Rachael. I'd still be with Tadgh if ya hadn't talked ta me."  
"I'm glad things are working out. But you still have a long road ahead and I'm going to talk to Don and Mikey about what they need to do to ensure you don't fall off the wagon again."  
"I ain't gonna touch drugs no more. I learned my lesson. And I'm gonna work hard at gettin' Leo back."  
"He might not want you. Have you considered that?"  
"I have, but I'll never stop tryin' ta win his love again."  
"He might have moved on, Raphael."  
"Not Fearless. He ain't the kind ta move on so quickly. My hope is that over time, he'll remember all the good times we had and will forgive me and take me back."  
"If he doesn't, I still want you to focus on healing yourself and doing things to make yourself happy. Walks, painting, drawing and time with the children. Anything that'll boost your confidence. What about a job?"  
"I help out at my friend, Casey's auto repair shop."  
"Leo works?"  
"Nope. He stays home with the kids."  
"That must be tough on him."  
"Yer right. It must be. I ain't never thought 'bout that before. I'm gonna tell him that he can work if he wants ta and we'll take turns bein' home with the kids."  
"See, Raphael. Marriage is about compromise. It sounded like Leo did everything from what you told me."  
"Yer right, but I stayed home for years carin' for the kids. Leo wanted that and I resented it. We had many fights. I had post partum depression after Raphie and I think Leo felt bad, because of that, for making me stay at home and for knockin' me up all the time, so he let me go out. I took advantage of that and dumped him with all the baby duties. It does take two. We both screwed up things. Me more than him, though. Leo's mostly been fantastic. I couldn't have asked for a better mate."  
"Will you have more kids?"  
"No. Three kids in four years takes it outta ya. I was in labor with Raphie for twelve, long hours and was then extremely depressed. I couldn't bond with him when he hatched. It was terrible. The other kids' labors weren't long at all and I was able ta get outta bed a few hours after."  
"Did you get help for the depression?"  
"Don helped me. Leo tried, but he didn't know what ta do. Now we're divorced with three, small kids. Never thought that would happen. I thought me and Leo would be together forever."  
"And what if there's someone else in Leo's life?"  
"That won't happen."  
"But if it did?"  
"I'd fight them and tell them ta stay away from Leo and my sons."  
"Raphael, be serious."  
"I am."  
"You can't fight someone else just because they love your ex. He might be an awesome guy and like your kids. Maybe he makes Leo happy."  
"So what? I'm their dad. Not a stranger. And no one's gonna raise them, but me and Leo. Ya think I'm bein' an idiot thinkin' Leo may forgive me?"  
"You're hopeful. It's understandable. You have babies and you want to get back..."  
"I don't wanna get back with Leo just 'cause of the babies. I love Leo and it took losin' him ta see what a selfish bastard I've been. I treated him like dirt and he never deserved that. I wanna make things right and I will. If there's a new guy, he better scram, 'cause I'm comin' home and I'll stop at nothin' ta make my family whole again."  
"Personally, I think you should focus on healing yourself...."  
Raphael waved a hand dismissively. "Ya don't get it. Me and Leo are soulmates and no matter what's happened before, we worked through things. Now I'm on the road ta recovery, Leo will see that and take me back. It might not be overnight, but it'll happen. Ya will see."  
I know it'll happen, Raphael thought. Deep down he still loves and misses me. And I meant it. I'll do all I can ta make my family whole again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Raphael returns home.
> 
> I'm not sure if April's dad has a jet, but in this story, he does.


	10. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael returns home to his family.

Mikey, Don, Casey and April took the jet and landed in Cali later that day. After landing at an airfield base, they caught a cab and headed to the address Raphael had given. Arriving at Rachael's house, they all jumped out of the cab and went up the porch steps. Raphael looked out of the window and cleared his throat nervously when he saw them. I wonder what they'll say when they see what I look like, he thought. Maybe I can make up a bullshit story that I was in a fight and they'll believe it. "Nervous?" Rachael asked, when the doorbell went.  
Raphael nodded. "It's been a while since I've seen them. I got no idea what they'll do or say."  
"You'll be fine, Raphael."

Rachael opened the door and said, "Hi. I'm Rachael Lawson and you are?"  
"I'm Don," Don said. "And these are Mikey, Casey and April. Is Raph here?"  
"Please come in. He's in the lounge."

xxxxx 

They all went into the lounge and gasped when they saw Raphael and all of his bruises. "Bro," Mikey said, rushing to his side and hugging him, quickly followed by Don. "What happened to you? Who did this?"  
"I, uh, got into a fight," Raphael said. "With some Purple Dragons."

"They're here in Cali?" Casey asked, raising an eyebrow. "I thought they were only in New York."  
"Nope. They're here," Raphael said. "Believe me."

"Where?" Don asked, after they'd pulled apart. "I want to kick their asses."  
"I don't exactly know where. I think it was Venice Beach," Raphael said, looking down at the ground. "Please don't tell anyone. I'm so embarrassed that they whipped my ass. Thank goodness Rachael helped me. I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her."

Raphael, Mikey and Don exchanged a look that the others missed. Raphael knew that they didn't buy his story and would grill him later, but they'd act like they believed him for the moment. "We should go," April said. "Thanks for looking after Raph, Rachael."  
"You're welcome. Before you leave, I must tell you that Raphael has a long road ahead of him. You'll need to watch him in case he reverts to his bad habits, especially if he experiences something that causes him emotional pain. Like his ex moving on. Addicts tend to relapse then."

Oh, Oh, Don thought. Raph's going to flip when he finds out about Brennan. Aloud he said, "I'm the family doctor. I know what to do. I'll take care of Raph. We all will."  
"Leo hasn't moved on," Raphael said. "I told ya he wouldn't do that ta me. He loves me."

Don changed the subject and said, "And what else, Rachael?"  
"He needs to lay off the booze and drugs. They mess with one's system. And you need to sit down as a family and discuss how to go forward, mediate, discuss care for the children, custody and things like that. Raphael needs a strong support system and stability."  
"Right. Raph will come to counselling, won't you, Raph?"

"I'll do whatever it takes, Don," Raphael said.  
Rachael rambled on for a long time about what they needed to do to care for Raphael. Then she said, "I want a word with Raphael. Privately if you don't mind."

"Sure," Don said. "We'll wait here."

xxxxx 

Rachael took Raphael into her bedroom, shut the door and said, "Firstly, I want you to know that I'm here if you ever need to talk. You can call me anytime."  
"Thanks, Rachael. Ya've been wonderful."  
"Secondly, you need to fess up to your family and tell them what really happened."  
'I feel so ashamed. They'll think less of me, because strong, tough me got beaten up."  
"They won't, Raphael," Rachael said, laying a hand on his shoulder. "You have nothing to be ashamed about. It wasn't your fault. Talk to them."  
"Maybe I will, but I can't tell Leo. He'll tell me that he was right. He said that Tadhg was an ass. I laughed at him and said that he was just jealous."  
"What kind of person is Leo?"  
"He's generous, affectionate, strong, passionate and sensible. I could go on all day 'bout how awesome he is."  
"If he is all you say, I doubt he'd revel in what happened to you. He'll most likely be upset and sad. Tell him."  
"I already lost face with him. I don't wanna lose more."  
"Raphael, if you really want Leo back, you'll have to be open and honest with him about everything and that includes the dark moments. You can't have a relationship with secrets and distrust."  
"I'll think 'bout it. What are ya gonna do?"  
"Matthew's funeral is later this week. I'm selling the house. Too many memories. I'll stay with a friend in North Carolina for a while and then I think I'll move to France. Matthew and I always dreamed of living in the French countryside."  
"Ya want me ta stay on for a while?"  
"No, no. I'll be all right. You need to go home to your babies. I want lots of photos, okay?"  
"So ya will stay in touch?"  
"You bet I will."  
"Ya will come ta the weddin', won't ya?"  
"Wedding?"  
"Me and Leo. I know we're gonna get married again."  
"I'd be honored. You have a great opportunity to mend relationships, Raphael, and to get your life back on track. Don't screw up."  
"I won't."  
"Let's join the others."  
"I owe ya for all the things ya got for the kids."  
"You don't. Call it my present for ensuring Matthew's killer was jailed."  
"Thank ya."

xxxxxx 

They joined the others and everyone exchanged phone numbers. Raphael hugged Rachael and said, "Thank ya for everythin'."  
"Look after yourself, Raphael. I don't want to hear that you relapsed."  
Raphael pulled away and smiled. "I won't. Man. I can't wait ta see my kids." He picked up the bag of toys and added, "My boys are gonna love this. Thanks."

xxxxx 

Don had called a cab a few minutes earlier. It arrived and he, Raphael, Mikey, Casey and April piled into it. Raphael waved at Rachael until he could no longer see her. "How's Dad?" Raphael asked.  
"He's good," Mikey said. "He misses you, Raph. We all did."  
"It'll be great ta be home again. I missed yer cookin'. Have my boys been eatin' their greens?"

"Nope," Don said. "They're fussy, just like you were when you were a baby."  
Raphael smiled. "And Leo? How's Leo been?"  
"Like Leo," Don said, feeling awkward. "We're nearly at the airfield."

xxxxx 

They arrived at the airfield, got onto the jet and arrived in New York five and a half hours later, getting back to the lair just after 5 a.m. New York time. "Wow," Raphael said. "I can't believe I'm home. Thank ya for gettin' me, guys."  
"You're welcome, Raph," April said sleepily. "Me and Casey are going home. See you guys later."  
"Ape, I wanna say I'm sorry for all I did. I'm sorry, Case."  
"Raph, we'll talk later, okay?" April said kindly. "Get some rest. You look exhausted."

"See you later, Raph," Casey said. "All's good, man. We'll talk later."

"Your old bedroom's ready," Don said. "Come, Raph."  
"Nah. I'm gonna sleep in Leo jr and Kane's room. Night, guys."  
"Night, Raph. Don't wake them."

"Night, Raph," Mikey said. "Don't worry about morning training. You can sleep in today."  
"Heh. Thanks. Later."

xxxxxx 

Raphael went into Leo jr and Kane's bedroom and proudly looked down at his sleeping angels. My beautiful boys, he thought, undressing and getting into bed. Almost immediately, Kane sensed a new weight in the bed, woke up and saw his dad. "Daddy!" he shrieked, waking up Leo jr.  
"I'm here," Raphael said, holding his arms open. "I'm here. Come here, boys."

"Daddy!" Leo jr said, scrambling over to Raphael, followed by his brother. Raphael hugged them close to his chest and nuzzled them, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I missed ya boys so much. Look at ya. Ya've grown since I last saw ya. Ya been good, Leo?"  
"Yes, Daddy," Leo said, pulling away. "Kane, bad."  
"Really? And what did Kane do?" Raphael asked and chuckled. "I love yer Spiderman pajamas, Leo. Is he yer favorite superhero?"  
"You are, Daddy."

"Story," Kane said, disengaging himself. "Read, Daddy." Kane picked up a book on the bedside table and showed his dad.  
"The Three Little Pigs," Raphael said. "Okay, but we have ta be quiet, because everyone's sleepin'. Come snuggle with me." The boys cuddled up to him and he began to read. Kane and Leo jr giggled as Raphael huffed and puffed, like the big bad wolf. "Again, Daddy," Kane said, when Raphael had finished.  
"Okay, buddy." Raphael told it twice more and saw his boys had fallen asleep. He kissed them, lay down and closed his eyes. I missed readin' ta them, he thought. I missed them so much and I ain't gonna be parted from them ever again. Raphael was soon fast asleep, snoring gently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is Leo's reaction.


	11. An awkward encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael meets Brennan and Leo's reaction to Raphael's homecoming.

Leo jr and Kane woke Raphael up just after seven thirty. "Daddy!" Kane screamed into Raphael's ear slit.  
"Ugh. One more hour," Raphael said, covering his head with a pillow, but his kids were having none of it and continued to yell. "Okay. I'm gettin' up," Raphael grumbled, getting up and picking up Kane in his arms. "Come on. Let's see what Uncle Mikey's cookin'. Ya boys hungry? I know I am."

xxxx 

They went into the kitchen and Raphael's jaw dropped when he saw the young dark haired and eyed man sitting at the table on HIS chair. "Who the hell are ya?" Raphael growled, setting Kane down and making sure both boys were settled at the table. "Where are my bros and Leo?"  
The young man glanced up and smiled. "Hi, I'm Brennan. You must be Raphael. It's wonderful to meet you."

"Daddy," Leo said, tugging at Raphael's arm. "Hungry!"  
Raphael got down cereal from the cupboard for his children, poured it into bowls, added milk, got spoons and when they'd started to eat, said, "So, where are they and why are ya here?"

"Don's in his lab," Brennan said. "Mikey must be in his room. Leo's at my place. I came to get the kids."  
"What do ya mean ya came ta get the kids?" Raphael demanded. "And how do ya know Leo?"

A baby cried in the distance and Raphael raced to where the sound was coming from-his and Leo's- now Leo's bedroom. Raphael went inside, scooped up the weeping baby and pressed him to his chest. "Hey, sweet boy," he cooed and kissed his cheek. "Daddy missed ya. I bet yer hungry too and ya need changin'." Raphael changed his son, then took him into the kitchen, placed him in a carrycot and said, whilst preparing formula, "Answer my questions."  
"Leo should answer them," Brennan said and took a sip of his coffee.  
"Well, Leo ain't here. Answer them or ya will get my fist in yer face.  
"Leo's at my place getting their rooms ready."  
"Huh? Why? They got a place here."  
"A lot's happened since you left, Raphael. Leo and I've been dating and he's moving in with me."  
"Ya what?" Raphael asked, feeling his stomach drop. "Ya mean ya and Leo?"  
"It's probably rather sudden, given we haven't known one another long, but I like him and the kids and..."  
"NO!" Raphael yelled. "They're MY kids and they ain't goin' anywhere!"  
"Let's talk calmly, Raphael. You signed that piece of paper giving up your parental rights. You have no say."  
"I was stoned and outta my mind. I didn't know what I was doin'. Ya ain't takin' my kids! Get the fuck offa my chair and outta my kitchen and house!" Brennan stood up and tried to advance toward him, but Raphael was faster and swung a punch, hitting Brennan in the jaw. "Ya get the message now, asshole?" Raphael snarled. "These are my babies."  
Brennan's eyes flashed, he rubbed his aching jaw and said, "Raphael, I'll go, but that was completely unnecessary. I want to be friends."  
"Anyone, who tries takin' my kids away ain't a friend. Fuck off."

Raphael watched Brennan leave. Then he kissed his sons, who were staring at him. "You hit Bren, Daddy," Leo jr said.  
"I did. I ain't sorry," Raphael said and started to cry. Leo has a boyfriend, he thought. He has someone. I never thought that would happen. I wonder if Don and Mikey knew. Of course they knew. Raphael clenched his hands into fists and thought, they lied ta me by not tellin' me.

"Daddy, sad," Kane said and kissed his dad's beak. "Bren bad."  
Raphael smiled through his tears and kissed his three boys. "He is and I'm never lettin' anyone take ya from me. Ya are my life and I love ya. I promise that Daddy and I'll get back together and we'll be a whole family again." Raphael saw the formula was ready and fed his youngest son. Then he took the older ones into the lounge and settled them in front of the TV while he sat on the couch with Raph jr on his lap.

xxxxx 

Don entered the lounge a while later and said, "Morning, Raph."

Before Raphael could comment, Leo strode into the lair and shouted, "Hamato Raphael Firenzi, what the hell do you think you're doing?"  
"Watchin' TV with my kids, Leo. What does it look like?"  
"Don, can you watch the kids? I want to talk to my ex in private?"

"Sure," Don said, taking Raph jr from Raphael and sitting on the couch. 

xxxxx 

Raphael and Leo went into the kitchen. Leo's arms were folded over his plastron and he was scowling. "Why the hell are you back, Raphael?"  
"Ta see the kids."  
"Why? You never cared before and how did you get those bruises?"  
"Yer boyfriend socked me."  
"Bullshit. They look too old to have been today. Why are you back?"  
"I realized I've been an ass, Leo, and I miss ya and the kids."  
'And the bruises?"  
"Ran into some Purple Dragons in Cali and they jumped me. Happy now? Tough me got walloped."  
"I want you gone!"

"Raphael is NOT going anywhere," Splinter said, entering the kitchen. "Welcome home, my son."  
"Mornin', Dad, and thanks."  
"Leonardo, your brother's returned home, where he belongs. He belongs here despite your differences and he's the the father of your children."

"Yes," Leonardo said. "But I don't have to stay here. We're moving in with Brennan."  
"The hell ya are," Raphael snapped. "They're my sons too. And they're stayin' here. How long ya known the guy, Leo?"  
"None of your business."

"Six days today," Splinter said. "Leonardo, you're being reckless and I suggest as your father, that they stay here."  
"With due respect, Dad. I know what I'm doing. Raphael, you have no say."

"Dad, please," Raphael said. "I'm tryin' ta get better and I love the kids. I should see them. I'm still their dad."  
"Nope," Leo said. "Raphael may have good intentions, but what if he relapses? I can't have that for my sons."  
"Our sons," Raphael corrected. "And ya don't have ta worry. I'll have lots of help from our family."

"Leonardo," Splinter said. "Hold off on moving in with Brennan until you know him better. Please, my son. He might end up being another Tadhg. Do you want that for the children?"  
"Of course not. But I'm telling you now that he's not like that asshole."

"I thought so too," Raphael said. "But I was wrong. Ya wanna know where I got the bruises from, Leo? Tadhg did it. He hurt me both physically and emotionally, preyin' on the lack of confidence I had, since ya dumped me. He was brutal and if it weren't for a cop, who gave me the confidence ta leave him, I'd be dead. Ya shocked? Yeah. So am I. I never thought that would happen ta me."  
Leo's jaw opened, then closed and opened again. Mixed emotions running through him. Anger, sadness at knowing his ex-mate had been abused, pity for Raphael and love? Yes, Leo still loved him and thought about hugging him, but instead he said, "I'm sorry, Raph. That must have been hard."  
"Ya gonna tell me ya were right 'bout Tadhg?"  
"No. Why would I glory in your hurt? Excuse me. I'm going to call Brennan."  
Leo left before Raphael could see the tears in his eyes. I feel horrible for Raph, he thought. Dad's right. Even if Raph and I aren't together, we still have kids and need to be civil for their sakes. Poor Raph. I should have been there for him. Do I still love Raph? Yes, but I'm not going back to him. What if he relapses? I can't do that to the kids.

"Are you all right, my son?" Splinter asked.  
"I'll be okay, Dad," Raphael said.  
"I am so sorry you went through all of that. It greatly pains me."  
Raphael smiled thinly. "Dad, I'll get better and I'll win Leo back. That Brennan ain't gonna be 'round long."  
"I hope you do, my son, and you have my support."  
"Thanks, Dad."

Leo returned to the kitchen a while later and said, "I'm not moving in with Brennan now. Don't get so excited, Raphael. I still love him and you and I aren't getting back together."  
"How do ya know that, Fearless. Don't ya still love me?"  
Leo ignored the question. "Seeing as you're back, I can't exactly ignore you and I'll be civil for the children's sakes. You'll spend time with them and I'll spend time with them."  
"As a family."  
"No, Raphael. We're not a family. We just have kids, which means we'll always be in each other's lives, whether we like it or not, and we'll spend time with them separately. We'll meet with Don to discuss care for the kids, finance and so on."  
"I'll contribute ta their care, Leo. I wanna be an amazin' dad. And I believe ya will forgive me one day and we'll get married again."  
Leo rolled his eyes. "You owe Brennan an apology. He'll be here for dinner later."  
"He deserved it," Raphael growled.  
"Bullshit. He was being nice and you decked him. Apologize, Raphael!"  
"Fine," Raphael muttered.  
"I'm going to Brennan's for a while. Have fun and, Raphael, you better not relapse because I won't give you a second chance with the kids if you do."  
"Hey, Leo. What did ya tell people when I left?"  
Leo licked his lips nervously and said, "That you'd died."  
"Ya bastard!" Raphael shouted. "How could ya do that?"  
"You were basically a walking corpse, Raphael, and I didn't think you'd come home. Can you really blame me?"  
"If I have ta be honest, no, I can't. That's what makes me mad. I'm ta blame for breakin' up our family."  
"I'd love to stay and listen to your self pity party, but I have to be going. Bye, Dad."

Raphael watched Leo leave and thought furiously, self pity party? I was tryin' ta apologize! And fuckin' Brennan goaded me and I have ta apologize ta him. Ain't fair! But I'll do it, show Leo I've changed and I'll win him back. We'll be married again before the end of the year and we'll the happy family we were before I messed up. I promised my sons and I won't let them down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's hope the ex couple can be civil for the children's sakes.


	12. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's Brennan hiding?

Later that day, July 24, Brennan arrived shortly after five p.m. Raphael was watching TV with his sons, the baby on his lap. “Bren!” Leo jr said, running to Brennan and throwing his arms around Brennan’s legs. Raphael looked up and scowled. Brennan laughed and scooped the toddler into his arms. “Hey, buddy,” he said. Kane sensed his father’s displeasure and stayed with him. Brennan set Leo jr on the ground and said, “Hello, Raphael. Hey, Kane, buddy. I got new toys for you and your bros.” Brennan took out two cars from his shoulder bag and said, “Here you, go boys. I also got a stuffed toy for Raphie.”  
“Cars,” Leo jr shouted, taking the car. 

Kane wanted the car and looked from his dad to the car and back at his dad, but he made no attempt to move. Despite only being two, he was good at reading moods and he knew his dad was about to explode.

“No!” Raphael said furiously. “Ya don’t accept toys from strangers. Ya know better than that, Leo. Give it back.”  
“What the hell, Raphael,” Brennan said, taken aback. “I’m not a stranger.”  
“I said now, Leo. Give it back ta him and come here.”

“But I want the car,” Leo jr bawled. “Want car.”  
“Do ya want a smack?” Raphael growled. “Do as I say.”

Weeping, Leo jr handed the toy back to Brennan and went to sit with Kane. “That was cruel and pathetic, Raphael,” Brennan said. “It’s only a toy.”  
“Yer tryin’ ta buy my kids’ love. Ain’t gonna work and no one buys them toys, but me and people they know. Not ya.”  
“Raphael, we’re going to have to learn to get along.”

Leo jr was still crying. “Stop it,” Raphael said and kissed his forehead. “I’ll buy ya somethin’ much nicer, Leo. That’s a load of junk and yer wrong, I don’t have ta like ya, Brennan, or get along with ya.”  
“Have you considered medication, Raphael? You’re acting rather unstable.”  
“Unstable? Ya want me ta show ya unstable, because I will if ya don’t shut the hell up? Ain’t nothin’ wrong with my mental state. It’s ya, who’s the problem!”

Brennan was about to comment, when Leo entered the room. “Hey, Bren,” he said and kissed his cheek. Raphael noticed and scowled. “Things okay, Bren?” Leo asked, sensing the thick tension in the room. “Yes. I was just talking to Raphael about Homeland and…”  
“You don’t have to cover up for him, Bren. Raphael, are you behaving?”  
“He’s fine, Leo. Really. Can we talk for a few minutes privately? There's something I want to say.”

“Ya can say it right here if it's 'bout me," Raphael said.  
“All right,” Brennan said and cleared his throat. “Raphael’s crazy. All I did was give the boys a toy and he freaked out.”

“Is that true, Raphael?” Leo demanded, his hands on his hips.  
“They’re OUR kids. Not his. He’s a damn stranger.”  
“He's not. He’s my boyfriend and you owe him an apology for now and this morning.”  
“I ain’t ta blame. He deliberately presses my buttons, Leo."  
“RAPHAEL!”  
Raphael grumbled under his breath and muttered, “Sorry.”  
“I didn’t catch that. Can you speak up?”  
“I said I’m sorry. Happy now?”

"It's all right," Brennan said and smiled warmly. I’d love ta slap him, Raphael thought. Bastard actin' so smug and like he’s family. He ain’t and will never be. “I’d like us to be friends, Raphael,” Brennan continued. “It would be nice to talk without fighting.”  
“Sure.”  
“Great. Can I give the cars and stuffed toy to the kids, Leo?

Satisfied that peace was restored, Leo said, “Of course you can give the kids their toys. It was wonderful of you to think of them." Brennan handed the toys to the kids, but Kane shook his head. “No.”

“Don’t you want, it Kane?” Brennan asked.  
“Daddy said no.”

“It’s okay,” Raphael said. “Take it, Kane. I ain’t gonna get cross with ya.” Kane shyly took it. “Say thank ya, Kane.”  
“Thank you,” Kane said, clutching the car to his little chest. “Look, Daddy. It’s wed. Just like you.”  
“So it is.” 

Leo watched his sons play with their toys and said, “Do you want a drink, Brennan?”  
“Coffee, please.”  
“Raphael?”

“No, thanks,” Raphael said. Fuckin' asshole's never gonna be my friend, he thought. He's the insane one if he thinks he is.

Brennan sat down on a sofa and said, “What are your hobbies, Raphael?”  
“Get one thing straight,” Raphael said quietly, but firmly. “I'll be nice ta ya ta Leo's face, but me and ya ain’t gonna be friends, so ya can stop the small talk. Ain’t interested in talkin’ with ya. Got it? Now, shut up.”  
Brennan sighed. “I get it. You like fighting. Why are you always so aggressive and angry, Raphael? Is that why Leo and you split? Or is it because you always act so crazy? Do you have a split personality? Maybe that’s it. Or you’re psychotic. I’m leaning towards that.”  
“That ain’t no business of yers! Shut yer trap.”

“RAPHAEL!” Leo said, entering the lounge and hearing the last comment. “I thought you said you were going to be nice. You can go to your bedroom if you can't.” 

Raphael said nothing and turned to the cartoon he was watching with his kids, but he was seething inside. That asshole’s gonna get it, he thought furiously. Look at him, so perfect. Fuckin’ slime ball. I’d like ta shove my sai up his damn ass.

xxxxx 

The entire family gathered in the kitchen for dinner at six. Mikey had cooked lasagne. Raphael helped his kids eat their dinner and tried to drown out Brennan’s voice. The rest of the family seemed to like him and peppered him with questions, but Raphael had no interest, until Brennan said, “I come from a broken family. My parents divorced when I was little and it was really tough. I wouldn’t wish that on anybody.”  
“Then ya should move on, shouldn’t ya?” Raphael said and chewed a mouthful of lasagne.

“Raphael,” Splinter said. “We should be nice to our guests. Please apologize.”  
“Sorry,” Raphael mumbled.  
“Please continue, Brennan.”

“My dad left Mom and me with no money and my younger brother, Rhys, and I could barely afford to go to school, but Mom got several jobs and managed to send us. She died of cancer when I was ten and Rhys and I were sent to Ghana to live with our uncle, who owned a mine. He used to be in the US army.”

“I thought your brother was called Ryan, Brennan?” Leo said. “And he was older.”  
“You’re wrong, Leo. I said he was younger.”  
“Oh. That’s so sad. I’m so sorry.”

Smacks of bullshit, Raphael thought. “What’s yer surname, Brennan? Ya never said.”  
“Casey. Anyway, my uncle got kidnapped by some Nigerian war lords and Rhys and I had to fend for ourselves in Ghana. It was so scary. And then we got kidnapped and sold to some French human traffickers and they made us do the most appalling things.” Brennan covered his hands and let out a sob.  
“Oh, Brennan. I’m so sorry,” Leo said, grabbing his hand.

“Dude, I feel for you,” Mikey said. “That’s so sad. “Hey, Don?”  
“Yes,” Don said. “Very. You’re very brave to have survived that. Isn’t he, Dad?”

“Indeed,” Splinter said. “I’m most troubled that you went through that, Brennan, but you are safe here and you are part of our family.”

What bullshit, Raphael thought, catching Brennan staring at him. He knows I know it too. The others are eatin' his story up. How gullible. Why can’t they see he’s lyin’?”

“And then,” Brennan said, “We landed up in the Congo, but me and Rhys ran away and we took a boat and stowed away on it to South Africa. When we got there, we worked on the docks, saved our money and headed to the States.”  
“And yer uncle?” Raphael asked.  
“He’d managed to escape and was now working as an engineer on a boat in New York. He had the qualifications. That’s what I do.”

“Aren’t you a banker, Brennan?” Don asked.  
“No, no. Engineer. I used to be a banker.”

Ya change yer stories all the time, ya wanker, Raphael thought. Don’t believe ya. 

“And we were all happy being reunited,” Brennan said. “But then my uncle and I had to go to Somalia for work and he was kidnapped by pirates. I survived by the grace of God. They killed him with a machete before my eyes. It was so brutal.”  
“Uh huh,” Raphael said, rolling his eyes. “I bet it was. If it's true. Did they make yer brother walk the plank?”

“Of course it’s true, bro,” Mikey said. “Bren wouldn’t lie. Would he, Leo?”  
“No. Raphael, show some compassion. Bren’s been through a lot.”

“My brother died of cholera,” Brennan said sadly. “He wanted to work for the Doctors Without Borders and went to Guinea-Bisau to do his good deeds. He died last month at the tender age of seventeen.”

“Bit young ta be a doc,” Raphael said, raising an eye ridge.  
“He was the genius in our family,” Brennan said.  
“This is a load of crap and ya ain’t gonna fool me!”

“Yes, my son,” Splinter said. “Raphael, you need to show more compassion and empathy towards others. Young Brennan has been through a tough time. And your language is shocking.”

Brennan shot Raphael a nasty look and said, “I wasn’t trying to trick anyone. Talking about it was hard, but I wanted to be honest with everyone about my past.”  
“You owe Bren an apology, Raphael,” Leo snapped. 

“Yeah. Whatever. Sorry,” Raphael said, getting up. “I’m gonna bath the kids.” 

xxxxx 

Raphael took his three kids to the bathroom and got into the bath with them. He wrapped them in towels when they were all clean and took them to their bedroom. 

xxx 

Raphael dressed the kids in their pajamas, trusting Leo jr to hold Raphie for a minute, while he lugged the cot from Leo’s room into that room. Then he settled Raphie into the cot and kissed him. “Love ya, baby boy,” he said. “Always and forever.” Raphael then sat on the double bed his boys shared and read them a story. They shrieked with delight and made him read it a few times. He kissed them when they'd fallen asleep and said, “I love ya too. Ya boys are my world and I’ll always be here for ya.”

Raphael got up, sat at the desk and switched on the laptop, looking up “Brennan Casey”. Not shocked that he didn’t find a hit, he mumbled, “Scammer.” And then an article caught his eye. “Romance scammer Brennan Masters strikes again.” Opening the article, Raphael’s eyes widened, as he read how many victims Masters had fleeced of money. Males, females and young and old. He wasn’t choosy who his victims were. The various victims recounted the stories that Brennan himself had said. Raphael clenched his fists and swore under his breath. Leo has ta see this, he thought. I knew that ass was lyin’. He’s probably broke and spins those lies ta make people feel sorry for him and then he steals their cash and bolts. That’s what he did ta those other people!

xxxx 

Raphael stood up, went to the lounge, hoping to see Brennan, so he could clobber him, but only Leo was there. “Is that guy 'round, Leo?” Raphael asked.  
“Brennan went home."  
“Come and see this, Leo.”  
“What?”  
“Just come.”

xxxxx 

Raphael returned to the bedroom and Leo followed him. “Read this article,” Raphael said. “See. He’s lyin’ ta us. He’s a fraud, Leo.”  
Leo skimmed the article and said, “It looks like Brennan, but it’s not him.”  
“It is, Leo. Yer bein’ thick. He’s playin’ ya and our family!”  
“You’re just sore about me and Brennan dating, that you’ll do anything to cause trouble. That’s NOT him, Raphael.”  
“Sure looks like him!”  
“Get a life, Raphael. It’s not him. Now stay out of my business,” Leo said, standing up.  
“It is my business if he’s gonna be 'round the kids. He's hidin’ somethin’, Leo. Maybe this ain’t him, but that stuff he told ya is horse shit. Smacks of a romance scam.”  
“And you’re the expert on that?”  
“I ain’t, but I can call a spade when it’s a spade. This is shit, Leo. Ya can’t see that, because yer too blinded by yer interest in him. Ya don’t wanna admit that he could be a fraud.” Leo stalked out without another word. That is him, Raphael, thought. I know it’s him and I know he’s hidin’ somethin’ else too. I ain’t gonna rest until I find out what. Raphael sat at the desk and went back online, surfing. Finally, he stopped, his eyes wide in shock, as he read, “JUVENILE SEALED REPORT of Brennan Worthington.” I’ll call Casey in the mornin’ and ask him ta help me, Raphael thought, saving the URL and turning off the laptop. But I bet it’s real dirt. Has ta be. Brennan, yer gonna be busted big time by me!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What crime did Brennan commit that was sealed?


	13. The truth about Brennan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brennan's big secret is revealed. But was it true about the rape or another one of his lies?

The next morning, July 25, Leo was up early as usual and slipped out of the lair to go to Brennan’s place. Arriving there a while later, he rang the doorbell . Brennan opened the door and said, "Morning, Leo. This is a pleasant surprise.”  
“Can we talk?”  
“Of course. Come inside.”

xxxx 

They went into the lounge and Leo said, “My ex thinks you’re a romance scammer, Bren, and showed me a few articles about a guy that looks exactly like you.”  
“Oh.”  
“Is that all you’re going to say? Is it true?”  
“It's not true, Leo. There's a guy, who looks like me and he does that, but I’ve never defrauded people before. Why would I? Raphael’s jealous and is trying to turn you against me. Can’t you see that? He’ll stop at nothing, including fibbing, to win you back. You saw his behavior yesterday. It was so unstable and you saw how much he hates me. I’ve been totally honest with you, but maybe we should end things right now if you can't trust me.”  
“No, no. Of course I trust you, Bren, and you’re right about Raphael. He’s pathetic. I sometimes wish he'd fuck off. I’m so tired of the tension.”  
Oh, I’ll get rid of him, Brennan thought maliciously. Just you wait, Leo. Raphael will soon be gone.  
“Want some coffee, Leo?” Brennan asked.  
“No, thanks. I should head back home. Coming for dinner tonight?”  
“I’d love to. Thanks.”  
“Great. See you then. I’m sorry for doubting you.”  
“Not your fault, Leo. It’s Raphael’s for causing all the problems. His drug issues, his infidelity, his temper and his jealousy! It’s all him.”  
“You’re right,” Leo said sadly. “I made a huge mistake being with him. The only good thing we did are the kids. Anyway, I’ll see you later.” Leo planted a kiss on Brennan’s lips and left.

Brennan dialled a number and said, “Hey, Jared? Are you still collecting exotic species?”  
“Yes, cuz. Why do you ask?  
“Got a turtle that talks and walks. Want him?”  
“Know of four that do that. He one of them?”  
“Yes. His name’s Raphael. Cocky, arrogant and jealous bastard, who’s trying to ruin my relationship with my new boyfriend. Can you take care of it?”  
“Does he wear a red bandanna?”  
“Why, you know him?”  
“Slept with him a few times. He was cheating on his mate.”  
“Can you be detached when dealing with him?”  
“He was a good screw, but I have no emotional investment, cuz. When do you want me to get the package?”  
“Tonight. Raphael thinks I’m a romance scammer and is snooping into my past. Or should I say our past. He can never know what we did that caused both of us to get sealed records and what we do now. I told my boyfriend that Raphael’s fibbing and is jealous, which he bought, but Raphael won’t give up trying to find dirt on us, so he has to be nabbed.”  
“Oh, Bren. Are you ashamed that we’re serial killers?”  
“No. I love it, but Raphael might find out the truth and tell the cops, so he has to be stopped. Do you understand now?”  
“Yes. So how?” Brennan told him his plan and the cousins made plans to meet later that night.

xxxxxx 

When Leo got back to the lair, the family were breakfasting in the kitchen. Raphael was feeding the baby his formula and smiling down at him with great pride. “He’s gorgeous, bro,” Mikey said. “I hope you and Leo have more.”  
“Not likely,” Leo said, entering the kitchen and pouring a cup of green tea. “Raphael and I are done. Raphael, I want to talk to you and I’m doing it here. I’m sick of you meddling in my relationship and spreading lies about my boyfriend.”

“Lies,” Raphael hissed. “There were fuckin ’multiple documents on that asshole ‘bout bein’ a scammer, Leo, and he’s got a criminal record. Do ya know that?”  
“I don’t believe you, Raphael. You’re trying to turn me against Brennan! It’s so obvious. I don’t want you back. Accept it. Move on! And stop trying to cause problems.”  
“He is the FUCKIN' problem!”

“Language,” Splinter snapped. “My sons….”  
“He could be a serial killer,” Raphael said angrily. “For all ya people know.”

“Doubt it,” Don said quietly.  
“Raph, I love you, bro, but you need to stop with the jealousy,” Mikey said. “It isn’t cool.”

Hearing the raised voices, Raphie started to cry and Raphael soothed him and kissed his forehead. “It’s okay, baby,” he said. “I’m here. Ya guys have ta listen ta me. That guy’s hidin’ somethin’ and I think it’s bad.”  
“The only thing that smells of shit is you, Raphael,” Leo said furiously. “I wish you’d fuck off. Things were better when you weren’t around.”

“Language,” Splinter said.

“Is that so?” Raphael yelled. “Well, I ain’t goin’ anywhere. This is my home, those are also my babies and ya can’t tell me ta fuck off!”  
Raphael’s kids looked at him, but said nothing, used to their dad's temper.  
“Raphael,” Splinter said. “Maybe a night at Casey and April’s won’t hurt.”  
“I’m not leavin’ my kids!”

xxxxxx 

Raphael stormed out of the kitchen, Raphie, in his arms and went to his bedroom. Sitting down on his bed, he hugged the baby close to his chest and said, “Sh, little one. It’s okay. I’m here. Daddy’s always gonna be here.” He set the baby in his cot and lay down on his bed, staring at a photo of him and Leo on their wedding day. He'd taken it from Leo’s room and put on his bedside table. We were so happy then, Raphael thought. What the hell went wrong? Sure, I made mistakes, but I never thought it'd lead ta divorce. I still love Leo and want him back and he’s bein’ dumb ‘bout Brennan. That guy’s bad news and I’m gonna find out what he did, so Leo wakes up.

xxxxx 

Raphael spent most of the day in his room and emerged for supper to find that Brennan was there. Swell, Raphael thought sarcastically. Another evenin’ with dickhead. “Hi,” Raphael,” Brennan said politely from his seat opposite him at the kitchen table.

"Hello." Raphael then turned his attention to his kids and helped them eat their dinner. The meal went well and everyone chatted quietly, except Raphael, who just focused on his kids and their needs. He had no interest in the conversation.

xxxxxx 

After dinner, Raphael bathed his children, put them to bed and went to sit in the lounge with Don. Mikey and Splinter had gone to bed. “Mind if we join you guys,” Leo asked. “There’s a new sci fi flick on tonight I’ve been wanting to see.”  
“That depends,” Raphael drawled. “On whether Brennan wants ta answer a question I got.”  
“And what’s that, Raphael?” Leo demanded.

“Why do ya got a record, Brennan?” Raphael asked. “And none of yer BS. I want the truth.”  
“I’ll tell you,” Brennan said and heaved a sad sigh. “Everything I said was a lie.”  
“What a fuckin’ surprise,” Raphael said acerbically. 

“What do you mean, Bren?” Leo asked.  
“None of what I told you was true, Leo. I made that up, because I was so ashamed to tell you the truth and afraid you’d hate me. My dad raped me from the age of eight and at the age of twelve, I couldn’t stand it anymore and set the house alight, killing him. I was sent to Juvie and my record was sealed, because my uncle was friends with the Governor. I made up those stories, because I wished to have a life like that. It was better than the one I had. I’m so sorry. I’ll understand if you hate me and want to break up.”  
“No,” Leo said, pulling him close. “I’m so sorry, Bren. We’re here for you, aren’t we, Don?”

“Of course,” Don said. “I’m so sorry, Bren. That must have been awful and you have nothing to feel ashamed about, right, Raph?"  
“He’s playin’ ya,” Raphael snapped. “I don’t buy his crap and I ain’t gonna rest until ya see the light. I’m goin’ out. See ya.”

“Don’t bother coming home,” Leo yelled after him. “You’re not wanted, Raphael. You’re the bastard. Not Brennan and I wish we’d never hooked up. It was the biggest mistake of my life."

xxxxxx 

Raphael left the sewers, busted a few Purple Dragons to get rid of some of his anger nd went to sit on his and Leo’s favorite roof top, trying not to think about Leo and the harsh words he’d said. 

xxxxxx 

Raphael was on his way home at midnight, when he saw Brennan in the sewers. Brennan had left Leo’s at eleven and had waited in the shadows for Raphael. “Get outta my way, punk,” Raphael said furiously.  
“Why are you always so angry, Raphael?” Brennan asked.  
“Get yer face outta mine now or I’m gonna deck ya.”  
“I have a better idea,” Brennan said, pulling a syringe from his jacket and injecting Raphael.  
“What the hell?” Raphael said furiously. “What's that shit? What did ya do ta me?”  
“It’ll make you sleep, which should happen now.”

Raphael felt his eyelids grow heavy and his legs give way and he hit the floor. Yes, Brennan thought triumphantly. He called his cousin, who’d been waiting a few minutes away. Jared came and he and Brennan lugged Raphael to his waiting van. Then they drove to Jared’s house.

xxxxx 

Brennan stripped Raphael of his weapons, all his padding and his mask and chained and collared him. After placing him into a cage, he secured his chain to the hook on a wall and raised the cage a few inches off the ground. Brennan gazed at the still passed out turtle and thought sadistically, you’re mine now to do with as I please. Raphael. Mine and mu cousin's to be exact. I’m going to take great pleasure in torturing you and enjoy watching you crack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Raph escape or will he be one of Brennan and Jared's victims?


	14. In the hands of sadists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael is in the hands of two serial killers, who set about torturing him.

Brennan opened Raphael’s cage again, handcuffed his hands behind his back and went up the basement steps to the lounge. Collapsing on the couch, he fell asleep almost immediately.

xxxxx 

Raphael woke up to stiff limbs, a raging headache and pitch darkness a few hours later. What the hell, he thought? He tried to rub his eyes, but found they were handcuffed behind his back. Fuck, he growled, as his eyes adjusted to the dark and he made out various cages with exotic animals. An emaciated lion in the cage next to him stared at him with dull, yellow eyes. Where the hell am I, Raphael thought? In a cage? Last thing I remember is Brennan injectin’ me. He musta brought me here and trapped me like an animal. Fuck him. I ain’t one. “Ya hear me, dickhead?” Raphael said, yelling at the top of his lungs. “I ain’t an animal and I’m gonna fuck ya up when I get outta here!” No one came and Raphael let out a frustrated roar. He tried throwing himself at the bars with his shell, but nearly choked himself and quickly realized that he was chained to the wall behind him. Gasping for breath, he studied his new living quarters. It was cramped, lined with straw, had a bowl of water and strongly smelled of cat urine. His throat feeling parched, Raphael bent down and lapped up the water, as best he could, feeling humiliated that he had to resort to such measures. The water was stale, but at least his thirst was slaked. Knowing he couldn’t lie down, because of the chain, he sat down and surveyed his surroundings again. 

Raphael counted at least twenty cages in the basement that were close together. The guy workin’ with Brennan must be some kinda animal collector, he thought. These are all exotic species. What does he want ta do with me? Exhibit me? I ain’t somethin’ ta display, he thought furiously. I got a family and kids. Those animals do too and have thoughts and feelings like me. We ain’t commodity ta do with as one pleases!

A forlorn wolf howled two cages down and Raphael’s heart went out to him. I know how ya feel, buddy, he thought. I miss my family too. Guys, find me. Please. Raphael leant back against the wall, blinked back tears and closed his eyes. I need my strength ta fight, he thought. I gotta get some sleep, while I can.

Raphael was woken by footsteps approaching his cage two hours later. “Rise and shine, turtle,” Brennan said. “Had a nice nap?”  
Snapping his golden eyes open, Raphael hissed, “Fuck ya, Brennan. What kinda sick place is this?”  
“Your home, Raphael. Get used to it.”  
“Ya know I’ll escape.”  
“Really? How? You’re chained up, like the beast you are. But if you’re a good boy and listen to me, maybe I’ll go easier on you than I did my last victim. Alas, she died on her first night of living here. I believe it was from fright. She didn’t like the snakes. Pity. I’d hoped to keep her for another month.”  
“Victim? What? Are ya a killer or somethin’?”  
“Serial killer. Let’s see. I’ve killed thirty one people so far. You’ll be thirty-two when I’m done with you.”  
“Leo and the guys will come and look for me.”  
“Doubt it. See, Raphael. You’re prone to running off. Leo told me, so people will think you threw another hissy fit and ran away or that you relapsed and are drugging again somewhere. No one will look for you. And even if they do, you probably won’t be alive by then.”  
Raphael glared at him. “Yer wrong.”  
“We’ll see.”  
“Is yer name Brennan?”  
“Yes, but do you want to know the real reason why I have a record, Raphael? I raped my little brother and was sent to Juvie, but my parents, who loved me more, bribed the Governor to have my record sealed. My record will be expunged next week and I’m not going to have you revealing it to Leo! I will not lose Leo. I like him and the kids and this is why you’re here.”  
Raphael shuddered inwardly and thought, Leo’s datin’ a paedophile and a serial killer. Fuck. What if he touches my kids?"   
“I especially like little Kane. The thought of him makes my cock hard,” Brennan taunted. “Beautiful kid.”  
“Ya touch him and I’ll….” Raphael began, feeling nausea bubble in the pit of his stomach.  
“You’ll what, Raphael? Hurt me? How? I think I’m going to touch little Kane the next time I see him. Maybe I’ll do more than that. Stick my thick dick up his…”  
“Ya can do whatever ya want ta me, but don’t touch my kids. Don’t. They’re babies. Ya got an issue with me. Not them.”  
“Yes. I do have an issue with you, but I like little boys. They’re so cute and trusting. I’ll have great fun with Kane.”

Raphael slowly and painfully gripped the bars behind him with his chained hands and rose to his feet. Grimacing, he looked Brennan in the eyes and said, “I mean it. Do what ya want ta me, but don’t touch the babies. Please.”  
“Please? Now you have manners, Raphael? When it fucking suits you. Life doesn’t work that way.” Brennan moved closer to the bars and spat at Raphael, his spit landing in the centre of Raphael’s plastron. “That’s what I think about you, Raphael. You’re a beast, worthless, and I'll have fun torturing you before you join my victims up in Heaven or Hell or wherever they are. Get some sleep. I’ll be back later.”

Raphael slumped to the ground, unwanted tears springing to his eyes. No, no, don’t touch the babies, he thought. Don’t. Please don’t. Leo….

“Hello, Raphael,” Jared said, entering the basement.  
“Jared?” Raphael said, looking at him in amazement. “Are ya in on this too?”  
“Yep. My cuz and I love killing. I’m sure he told you and it’ll be fun slicing you up. Never killed a turtle before. No, wait. I did. I drove over one once with my car and loved it when it was squashed like a pancake! You were fun, Raphael, but it meant nothing, okay? We agreed it was just sex.”  
“Ya don’t wanna kill me, Jared. I have a family. Please.”  
“I do want to. I want to watch the light die out in your eyes. That’s the best part. The controlling and playing God. It’s why I do it. Man. It makes me feel so alive. They always beg at the end. You’re so smug and arrogant, but you too, will plead for your life. They all do. Men, women and kids. It makes no difference.”  
“Yer a psychopath! Why didn’t I realize that?”  
“Why thank you. I’m flattered you think so highly of me. Brennan, bring the goat!”

Brennan appeared a few minutes later with a goat and a large tub of sugar. “What are ya doin’?” Raphael asked.  
“Setting up something fun for you, Raphael,” Brennan said and chuckled. “Or should I call you Raphie? Because you’ll soon be screaming like a little baby! Taser, Jared.”

Jared picked up a taser from the desk and shot Raphael in the plastron. The turtle crumpled to the ground and Brennan and Jared opened the cage, untied and unchained him and strapped him down to a gurney. Then they dipped his feet in the sugar and let the goat lick him.

Raphael woke up a while later, his feel and toes feeling ticklish. Glancing up, he saw the goat licking his feet with its raspy tongue. “Ugh! Stop!” Raphael said. “Don’t. I hate that.”  
Brennan smirked. “Sore?”  
“No. Is this the best ya got. Tickle torture?” Raphael said scornfully. “Ya got ta do better than that. Ya call yerselves torturers? Ya suck at it.”

“That’s what you think,” Jared said and laughed. “It’s only annoying right now, but it'll soon be painful. Trust me. Let’s watch, Brennan. Hey. Get some popcorn? This is going to be a show!”   
Brennan smiled. “Will do. I’ll see you now.”

Raphael tried to move, but he was unable to. All he could do was lie there helplessly, as the goat licked his feet. He tried not to laugh, but the tickling got to him and he laughed repeatedly, tears in his eyes from mirth, rage, frustration and fear.

Brennan appeared with the popcorn and the two sadists munched it, while watching Raphael’s discomfort. “This is better than a movie,” Jared said. “Thanks for including me in on this, cuz.”  
“You’re welcome,” Brennan said. “Having fun, Raphie?”

“Fuck ya!” Raphael yelled. “The name’s not Raphie. I’m Raphael!”  
“Whatever you say, Raphie,” Brennan said and grinned.

I hate ya, Raphael thought. I fuckin’ hate ya and I won’t let ya break me. I won’t. I'll get outta here and kill ya. I swear I will!

Brennan shooed the goat away two hours later and examined Raphael’s feet. They were cracked, raw and blistered. The goat had been relentless. Stubborn, Raphael had resisted groaning, knowing that would please the sickos. Instead, he’d grimaced and kept his pain to himself. “Raphie,” Brennan said mockingly. “You’re quite an asinine bastard, aren’t you?”  
“Speak English, twerp!” Raphael retorted.  
“Oh, yes. I forgot I was talking to an uneducated fool. Asinine means stubborn…”  
“Screw ya. I ain’t stupid,” Raphael snapped and spat in Brennan’s face. 

Brennan wiped the spit off his face, leaned down, inches from Raphael’s face, and said, “I’m getting you a present. Jared, take the goat away.”  
“Yes, cuz.”

Fuck them. I won’t break down, Raphael thought. My anger’s the only thing, apart from my kids, that’s keepin’ me goin’ and I won’t break. I won’t.

Brennan returned with a large, opened packet. “What’s that?” Raphael asked.  
“Your present,” Brennan said, tossing the contents onto Raphael’s feet. Unable to stop himself, Raphael screamed, as the salt assaulted his wounds.  
“Fuck!” Raphael roared.  
“Told you I’d get you to scream,” Brennan said and smiled maliciously. “Salt always works well on wounds.”  
“FUCK YOU!”  
“Oh, come now. The salt will help heal your wounds. Don’t be so ungrateful, Raphie. I did you a favor.”  
“Bastard, asshole…”  
“Your manners are lacking, Raphie. What gutter language. You should be ashamed of the filth you speak. And I’m sick of your voice .It’s actually quite annoying. How did Leo put up with you? Tut tut. Well, he doesn’t have to deal with you anymore. I’m going to get some breakfast. See you later, Raphie. Toodles.”

Left alone, Raphael ignored the rumble in his stomach. He was starving, but there was no way he’d tell his captors and beg for food. No. I still got pride left and they ain’t gonna take it, he thought. His feet throbbed, but he bit his lip, refusing to cry. I won’t let them see me do it. I won’t, he thought. Raphael closed his eyes and an image of his kids appeared in his mind. I love ya, babies, he thought. I will come home. I will. Daddy’s gonna come home. Please don’t think I left, because I never would. I love ya too much. Mikey, Don and Leo, please find me before it’s too late. I wanna come home. Please.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What will Brennan and Jared do next?


	15. Mind games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brennan continues his twisted "games" to break Raph down.

When Raphael didn’t appear for breakfast that day, July 26, the family were mildly curious as to why until Leo pointed out that Raphael had stormed off the previous evening and probably wanted time alone. He’d come home when he was ready. They were still unconcerned when Raphael wasn't there at lunch, although Kane did ask, “Daddy, where’s Daddy?”  
“I don’t know,” Leo said. “But I’m sure he’ll come home when he’s ready.”

Brennan had joined them and he piped up,“Maybe Raphael’s drinking or drugging again, Leo. Us together has been emotionally taxing for him and it'd make sense if he’d relapsed, which reminds me. I didn’t want to cause trouble, but I saw Raphael with a bag of white powder when I arrived the other day. I suppose he kept it in his belt, so you guys wouldn’t see.”  
Leo’s eyes clouded. “I knew Raphael wouldn’t keep his promise of staying clean. Addicts never do. Excuse me. I have to do something.” Leo got up and quickly left the room.

Don furrowed his brow, mulling over what Brennan had said. I don’t know, he thought. Raph seemed so determined about his kids and staying clean. Is Brennan telling the truth?

“I’ve seen many addicts,” Brennan said. “This is normal behavior. Vowing to stay clean and then relapsing. Raphael’s no different. I’m sorry. I should have said something earlier, but I was afraid he'd hit me again.”  
“Yes,” Don said. “But Raph loves his kids and he wouldn’t leave them again. He swore he was sorry and wanted to be a better father. I think something’s happened to him!”

“Me too, bro,” Mikey said. “Only yesterday, Raph told me how much he loves being a dad and that the babies are his world. I can’t see him leaving them again.”

xxxxx 

A loud anguished wail came from a bedroom and Don raced off to where it emanated from, the kids’ bedroom, where Raphael had been sleeping. Leo held a bag of white powder in his hands and was sobbing. Don pulled him close and said, “It’s okay, Leo. It’s okay.”  
“No, It's not,” Leo said, pulling apart. “Raph’s drugging again, Don. He promised he’d stay clean and I gave him another chance with the kids, but now I can’t. I have to let him go. I can’t have him around the kids anymore if he comes back. He’s a danger to them.”  
“Leo, is that the only reason you’re upset?"  
“What do you mean?”  
“You avoid Raph as much as you can. Is that….”

“Is everything okay?” Brennan said, appearing in the room. “Oh, no,” he said, looking at the package Don now held. “Is that blow?”  
“It is,” Don said. “Appears you were right about Raph.”  
“I’m sorry, guys. Are you all right?”

“Fine,” Leo said. “Raphael’s dead to the family now. We gave him another chance and he blew it. Tell Mikey, Don.”  
“Will do,” Don said. “Hey, Leo, I need some help with my project later. You know my new experiment.”  
“Can’t. Bren and I have plans.”

“Oh, sorry, Leo,” Brennan said and heaved a heavy sighed. "I forgot to tell you I have plans with an old friend that I made months ago. I’ll have to see you later. I’m sorry.”  
“It’s all right, Bren. I’ll probably turn in early.”

“So you can help me then, Leo,” Don said.  
“Yeah. Let me know when.”

“I’m going now,” Brennan said. “I’ll call you later, I love you, Leo.”  
“Yeah.”

As Brennan walked out, Don thought he saw him smirk. But what about, Don thought? The drugs? Raphael? Why would he smirk about it? Of course he’d be happy Raph would be out of the picture. There’d be no more tension. It's fishy that he and Raph fought last night and then Raph’s missing? Or am I reading too much into this? Maybe I just imagined the smirk. I have been working rather hard, so my mind’s probably playing tricks on me.”

“You look lost in thought, Don,” Leo said. “What’s up?”  
“Do you still love Raph?”  
“What?”  
“Answer the question, Leo.”  
“NO.”  
“You spend all your time avoiding him.”  
“Because he’s a fucking creep and a liar and I can’t fucking stand the sight of him. Get out of my way, Don. I have things to do, like take care of my children, who once again have ONE father thanks to that selfish bastard.”

Don watched him go, shaking his head sadly. I think Leo still loves Raph and he’s lying to himself, he thought. That's why he avoids him so much. I don’t believe he loves Brennan, else he’d have said he loves him too. I was hoping Leo and Raph would get back together, but now Raph’s gone. Something still feels a bit off. I don’t know what exactly, but I’m going to find out what.

xxxxx 

Raphael had spent his day strapped to the gurney, so all he could do was think. And he did. About Leo, his kids and his other brothers. How I miss them, Raphael thought, trying not to cry. I’d give anythin’ ta be home. That creep better not have hurt Kane! Raphael’s belly was growling all the time, his throat was dry, his feet hurt like hell and he desperately wanted the toilet. He held out for as long as he could, but he couldn't anymore at noon and pee trickled between his legs. Humiliated, Raphael blinked back tears and thought, no, ya still won’t break me. Ya won’t. Raphael’s humiliation was complete, when something warm and solid made its presence a minute later. He looked down at the brown mess, the pungent smell attacking his nostrils, and he was unable to stop the tears that ran down his cheeks.

Covered in his own filth and craving a bath, Raphael was almost grateful when Brennan appeared later that day. “Ugh. You smell disgusting, Raphie,” Brennan said and wrinkled his nose. “Did you poop on yourself? What a dirty little baby you are.”  
“Fuck ya,” Raphael hissed.  
“Still rude. I’ll deal with your insolence later. I had lunch with Leo and the guys and Leo told me he loves me. The first time we told one another.”  
“Leo won’t love ya when he finds out the truth ‘bout ya and what yer doin’ ta me. He’ll kill ya.”  
“He hates you, Raphael, and everyone thinks that you’ve left and gone back to the drugs. No one cares about you.”  
“Why would they think that? What the fuck did ya do?”  
“I planted some bags of blow, made up a story that I’d seen you drugging and they believe me. Because addicts do relapse and that’s what you did, Raphie.”  
Raphael glared at him and said, “Fuck ya, Brennan. They may believe ya now, but sooner or later, someone will realize that ya’ve been lyin’.”  
“Doubt it. I’m a master manipulator and I have everyone eating out of my hands.”

Jared appeared and said, “Cuz, I have the ants you wanted.”  
“Ants?” Raphael asked. “What for?”

Brennan ignored Raphael’s question and tasered him. Then he and Jared unstrapped Raphael, hosed the filth off of him and hung him up upside down. Then they threw a nest of biting ants onto his face. When Raphael woke up, he felt the insects biting into his flesh and he bit back a scream. I won’t scream, he vowed. Brennan and Jared left him there and it wasn’t long before Raphael blacked out.

xxxxxx 

When the psychos returned an hour later, they cut the still passed out turtle down and suspended him in a freezing well in the garden, knowing that Raphael would fear he'd drown if sleep came. Raphael came to a few minutes later and studied his surroundings. “Where the fuck am I?”  
“In the well,” Brennan called down. “Have fun, Raphie. Oh, and I want you to know that I fondled little Kane today. He liked it and nuzzled my hand. He’s the sweetest little boy. I can’t wait until I fuck him.”  
“YA SICK BASTARD!” Raphael shouted.  
“I’m going to do it again tomorrow and maybe show him how to give oral.”  
“NO!” Raphael screamed. “NO. NO, NO!” Then he started to cry. “No, please, no. Not my baby.”  
“I knew I’d get you to scream, again Raphie. It’s pointless, though, because no one will hear you. And you can’t help your children. How does it feel being so helpless, Raphie? The great Raphael, so helpless and pathetic. Night.”

Brennan and Jared left. Raphael screamed and cried, until he was hoarse, the thought of the man defiling his child and knowing he was helpless to prevent it happening again, terrified and enraged him. But his screams went unheard. 

xxxx 

Leo was studying a photo of him and Raphael taken shortly after they’d started dating. Tears ran down Leo’s cheeks, as he saw how happy they’d been. Don’s right. I do still love Raph, he thought. And I’m mostly mad, because I hoped that he'd stay clean and we’d have another shot together. I know I have to stay strong and accept that Raph’s gone, but I…I wish he’d come back to me and….No. I have Brennan now. I can’t think about that. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do. I’ll talk to Don in the morning. 

Leo tried to sleep, but he was unable. He picked up his phone and dialled Raphael’s T-phone. After getting voicemail, he said, “It’s me. Raph, where the hell are you? Are you drugging again? You’re a fucking selfish ass and I hate you.” Leo hung up. Then feeling emotional, he dialled again and said, “Raph, it’s me again. I’m worried about you. Please call. The kids are asking about you.” Leo dialled again ten minutes later and said, “Raph, I love you and I don’t want Brennan. I thought I did, but I don’t love him. I want you home. We’ll talk. Please call me when you get this.” Satisfied that he’d finally been honest about his feelings, Leo crawled into bed and managed to fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Brennan be able to still manipulate? Will Leo dump him? Will the guys ever find Raph?


	16. Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael finally breaks down.

Brennan checked Raphael’s T-phone messages. There were ten. Mikey, four, three from Don and three from Leo. As he listened to Leo’s last message, his face darkened. So Leo loves him, huh, he thought? Well, he won’t for long. 

xxxxx 

Brennan drove a short distance to a field, pulled out Raphael’s T-phone and typed a message to Leo, "Stop calling me and tell the guys to stop calling. I want to be left alone. I'm happy for the first time in my life. Leo, you need to move on. I know I’ve been a bonehead about Brennan, but I’ve had time to think. He’s nice and if you’re happy, then I’m happy for you. I want to move on too, and date someone else. Be happy, Leo. Raphael.” Hitting send, Brennan smirked and thought, that'll change Leo’s mind. Then Brennan tossed the SIM from the phone into the field and ran over the phone with his car.

xxxx 

Leo woke up to the sound of his beeping phone. He grabbed it, stared at the new message and thought, Raph didn’t write this. This isn’t how he speaks and types. Something’s happened to him.

xxxxxx 

Leo went to Don’s lab, figuring he’d still be up even though it was after one in the morning. “What is it, Leo?” Don asked.  
“I just got a message from Raph. Well, someone pretending to be him. Look at the message.”  
Don scanned the message and said, “You’re right. That’s not Raph’s way of speaking and he never signs things with his full name. Also, I sincerely doubt he’d give his blessing about Brennan. He hates the guy. Let me see if I can trace him using the T-phone coordinates.”

Don sat at his computer, typed in the coordinates and said, “Leo, he was last at a small field.” Don mentioned the location.  
“Then we have to go there. Pronto.”  
“Let’s grab Mikey and go.”

xxxxxx 

Leo, Don and Mikey headed to the field and searched all over for Raphael, but finding no trace of him and dawn about to break, the brothers headed home I will find you, Raph, Leo vowed. I will. Hang on wherever you are.

xxxxxx 

Brennan and Jared came for Raphael at six a.m. The turtle had blacked out again earlier and the men carried his limp body back into the basement and secured him to the gurney. Then Brennan poured water onto his face and slapped him. Raphael woke up, spluttered and glared at him. He tried saying fuck ya, but he was unable to speak. “Oh, you’re mute now?” Brennan taunted. “That’ll teach you for yelling all night. I made love to Leo last night, Raphie. He was warm and tender. Then I went and played with little Kane. Raphael’s face darkened and he tried to speak, but he was still unable. Brennan laughed at his helplessness and said, “Leo thinks you’ve moved on. Lovely little message I sent, pretending to be you.”  
“Go fuck yerself,” Raphael mouthed.  
Brennan smiled savagely. “I’d be nice if I were you, Raphie. Hey, Jared. Do you have the girl?”

“Yes,” Jared called, appearing in the basement with a bedraggled, naked and scared-looking young girl, who looked to be about seventeen. “Please don’t hurt me,” the girl begged. “I’ll be good. Promise. Let me go and I won’t tell anyone.”

“As if,” Brennan said. “Bitch, meet my other prisoner.”  
The girl glanced down at Raphael and let out a shriek. “What is it?”  
“Shut up, bitch. I want you to hit that beast with this whip. We'll let you go if you do that."  
“Promise?” the girl naively asked.  
“Cross my heart and hope to die.

The girl picked up the whip that Brennan handed her and began to thrash Raphael. The turtle gazed at her and mouthed, “I forgive ya. Just do it. I can handle it.” The girl shut her eyes, refusing to look at the thing, which she called him, and lashed at him, until Raphael was bleeding and was unconscious. “Now can I go?” the girl asked. “I did what you wanted.”

“Nope,” Jared said, grabbing hold of her in a headlock. The girl screamed, but he was too strong. Brennan got out his switchblade and callously slit her throat, grinning as blood began to pool on the floor. The girl’s body started to convulse, her body gave one last shudder and her eyes rolled back in her head. Jared dropped her to the ground and said, “Thirty-two, cuz. What about the turtle?”  
“I’ll wake him up.”

Brennan unzipped his pants and peed on Raphael, causing the turtle to wake up and blink at his surroundings, forgetting where he was for a moment. "Do you like that, Raphie?” Brennan said. “You smell so delightful now.” Brennan’s phone rang. “Yes? Oh, hey, Leo? Come for breakfast? I’m kind of wrapped up at work. How about tonight? Six works. Love you.” Brennan hung up and said, "That was Leo, Raphie.” 

Raphael ignored him and looked for the girl. Hope she managed ta get out, he thought. When he saw her prone body on the floor, his eyes went wide and he stared at the killers with a mixture of fear, abject horror and sadness. That’s gonna be me, he thought. I’m gonna die and everyone hates me. I’ll never see my babies again. “Raphie, Leo and the guys hate you. They aren’t coming. So settle down and enjoy the party,” Brennan said. 

Raphael shut his eyes. I couldn’t protect my babies, he thought. They depended on me and I couldn’t protect them. I don’t deserve ta be a father. I don’t deserve ta be alive. I couldn’t protect that girl either. I…His golden eyes snapped open in pain and shock, as he felt something slice into his arms. He glanced up, met Brennan's stone gaze and watched, as the knife that Brennan held cut into his arms, blood starting to ooze. “So reptiles do have red blood,” Brennan said. “I always wondered. Having fun, Raphie?” The turtle shut his eyes and grimaced, silently screaming. Stop. Please stop, he thought. As if reading his mind, Brennan said, “This is just the beginning, Raphie.” He made multiple incisions all over Raphael’s body and said, “This is fun. I love playing doctor.” 

Everything was too much for Raphael. His family hating him, Kane’s abuse, the girl dying and the constant taunting. He’d had enough and the last of his pride vanished. Silent tears trickled down his cheeks, as he realized he was powerless and he didn’t care anymore. Death would be a welcome end and it couldn’t come soon enough.

Brennan laughed at Raphael’s misery, stopped cutting and got some rope. Fashioning it into a tourniquet around Raphael’s right arm, he inserted a piece of wood and twisted it until Raphael’s nerves cut against the bone. Then he did the same to Raphael’s other limbs. The turtle continued to sob silently, which only made Brennan enjoy his job more. Clapping his hands gleefully, when he was done, Brennan said, “Raphie, you won’t be able to use any of your limbs for a long, long time, which means you're immobile and even more helpless. Good news for us, isn’t it Jared?”   
“Absolutely. Let’s take advantage of it, cuz. I’m feeling horny.” Raphael blinked back tears and shut his eyes, knowing what was going to happen. 

After Brennan and Jared had had their turns, Brennan looked at the blood crusted between Raphael’s legs and said, “That was fun. I’m going to get some grub. Torture always gives me an appetite. Bye, bye, Raphie.

Broken, humiliated, traumatized and in great agony, Raphael prayed for death to come, as more tears streamed down his cheeks. THE Raphael everyone had known, who was strong, macho and unbreakable was no more. In his place was a tortured soul, who might, if he ever survived, never fully recover from his ordeal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brennan deserves a dose of his own medicine!


	17. Destroyed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael is ready to meet his maker and Brennan subjects him to even more abuse.

Later that day, Brennan unstrapped a weak Raphael from the gurney. Then he dragged the weak turtle by his shell along the ground and deposited him in his cage flat down on his carapace. “I’ll be back later, Raphie. I’m off to have lunch with Leo. See ya.”  
Brennan slammed the cage shut and locked it. Then he left, whistling. Raphael closed his eyes and prayed again for death to be swift. 

Footsteps pounded down the basement steps a while later and Jared peered down at the turtle. “I’m gonna have some fun,” he said. He opened the cage door, dragged Raphael out and thrust into him as hard as he could, taking great delight when blood started to drip. “You like it rough, Raphael, don’t you?” he mocked. “You said you did. Going to fuck you so hard!” Jared kept pounding away and didn’t stop until he’d come with a mighty roar, shooting his seed deep into Raphael. The courageous turtle had switched off and done his best to block out the events, pretending he was with Leo. How I miss Leo, he thought. Leo. If only I hadn’t screwed up. When Jared had finished, he lifted up Raphael’s head and tilted some of the water from a bottle down his throat. Raphael nearly gagged, as the liquid burned his throat. Vodka. He’d know that taste anywhere. He’d had it often enough. Jared laughed and said, “Like that, Raphael? Have some more.” He poured more vodka down Raphael’s throat, enjoying his great discomfort. Then with one hand, he pulled down his pants, while keeping Raphael’s head steady with the other. Smiling nastily, he peed down Raphael’s throat. As the turtle gagged, Jared chuckled. “You always said you wanted to try new things, Raphael. I reckon you probably have three days left with us starving you. Don't worry. We'll let you go out with a bang.” Laughing, Jared picked up the helpless turtle and tossed him into the cage. Raphael landed on his carapace with a dull thud. Fuck. Have they cracked my shell, Raphael thought? The answer came when a blinding pain hit him and he saw white spots dancing before his eyes. Fuck. Enough already. Kill me, he thought.   
Jared locked the cage and went upstairs to the lounge. 

Raphael closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, dreaming of Leo and his kids. Leo. I miss ya, he thought. I’m sorry. So sorry. Forgive me. I can’t take no more. I’ll always love ya. Remember me, please, Raphael thought, as his golden eyes slid closed.

xxxx 

Brennan had a great lunch with Leo and the kids. Afterwards, he was watching a movie with Leo, when Kane came up to his dad and said, “Want Daddy to read to me.”  
“Want Daddy too,” Leo jr said. “Miss Daddy.”

“I know my precious babies,” Leo said. “Daddy will come back. I’ll find him.”  
“How if he’s dead?” Brennan asked.  
“I don’t think he’s dead. Raph and I have a special connection and I’d know if he was. He’s alive and he’s going to come home.  
"You can call me Daddy, Kane," Brennan said.

“Daddy?” Kane said.

“No,” Leo said, shaking his head. “Raph’s their daddy, Brennan. Don’t do that.”  
“But Raphael’s going to die."  
“What do you mean?” Leo asked, narrowing his eyes.  
“He’s drugging and probably drinking heavily, which will kill him. And if it doesn’t, do you really want him around the kids? He’s a bad influence.”  
“Yes. No matter what, Raph’s still their dad and he loves them. It'd kill him to be apart from them, which is why I don’t think he left voluntarily.”  
“So someone snatched a giant talking turtle? And how would they do that? No, Leo. That’s what you want to believe. Raphael left voluntarily. He told you so.” Realizing he was about to slip up, Brennan added, “By leaving the drugs in his room. That was basically saying he was going to split.”  
“Unless it was planted,” Leo said, looking at him. “It's no secret you and Raph hate one another.”  
“Gosh, Leo. I don’t do drugs and I wouldn’t do that to you or Raphael. Honest.”  
“I guess you wouldn’t, but I also got a message from Raph. But it wasn’t typed the way he speaks or types. That’s why I think he left involuntarily.”  
“Maybe you’re right. Gosh. I need to be getting back to work.”  
“Brennan, we need to talk.” Leo wanted to break up and had kept looking for the right moment.  
“It has to wait. Rain check?”  
“Sure. Listen, Brennan. You’re a great guy, but Raph will come back, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t encourage the kids to call you daddy.”  
“Sorry, Leo. I didn’t mean to offend you. I’ve just grown so attached to the kids, especially Kane. He’s a really special kid. My heart breaks for them that Raphael’s gone. Poor things.”  
“Kane’s taking it the hardest. He was especially close to Raph and followed him everywhere.”  
"Aw. I have to go.”  
“Dinner tonight?” Please, Leo, thought. So I can tell you.  
“Can’t. I have to go out of town on a business trip. I’ll swing by tomorrow before I leave.”  
“All right.”  
Leo didn’t know why, but something seemed off with Brennan. He hoped he was wrong and focused on his kids. Kane had become extra clingy and Leo had his hands full.

xxxxx 

Ten minutes later, at Jared’s place, Brennan had arrived and gone down into the basement. He opened Raphael’s cage and pulled out the turtle. “How you feeling, Raphie?” Brennan demanded. Golden eyes opened and stared at him fearfully. “Leo believes you’re dead, Raphie, and your kids are calling me Daddy. Isn’t that nice? I’m going to be a better dad to them than you were. Don't scream. Hah. I made a funny. I know you can’t. Lie still. Hahaha I’m so funny. You can’t move either. Brennan parted Raphael’s legs, unzipped his pants and thrust into him. Raphael bit his tongue, trying not to cry from the abuse, as the pain intensified. It feels like he’s splittin’ me in two, Raphael thought. Stop. “Ya win,” Raphael mouthed. “Ya broke me. Happy now?”  
Brennan was good at reading lips and he said, “Nope. I won’t be happy until you’re dead, Raphie. And I'm loving torturing you until then. You’re the best victim I ever had.” Brennan kept thrusting until he’d cum. Then he poured water down Raphael’s throat. “Drink, Raphie.” The cold water satiated Raphael’s thirst, but he was still hungry. As his stomach rumbled, Brennan said, “Nope. No food for you. I wonder how long you can live on sperm and water? Speaking of which…” Brennan shoved his dick down Raphael’s throat, enjoying the horrified look on the turtle’s face. “Suck, Raphie, or I’ll go stick my dick up Kane’s ass. Suck and swallow.” Raphael did as he was told, tasting Brennan’s hot seed as it shot down his throat. Swallowing hard he looked at Brennan and mouthed, “Done.”  
“Good beast,” Brennan said, pulling out.  
Then he left, leaving Raphael to his thoughts. He thought back to happier times. His and Leo’s wedding, their first date, all the battles they’d fought, the births of the kids, his last birthday, the first time they’d kissed, the last time they’d fought and hot tears spilled down his cheeks. Just let me die. I’m done, he thought. Please. If there is a God, let me die.

Two days passed and there was a heavy smell of death in the air. Jared had killed all of the animals, apart from the lion, and had left their corpses to rot in the cage near Raphael. The turtle himself, was hardly in a better shape. Weak, thirsty, hungry, lying in his own excrement and other filth, his sores festering and oozing, battered and bruised, he knew he didn’t have much longer to live. But why wasn’t God taking his life? Why, he wondered? Why is He bein' so merciless and makin’ me suffer?

Brennan had never gone back to the lair, saying that he’d had to leave earlier than expected.

A day later on the morning of July 30, Brennan decided that it would be Raphael’s last day on earth. He got up early, gave the turtle some water, proceeded to lash him with a whip and when he was unconscious, he and Jared inserted tiny wedges of bamboo under his fingernails and in the incisions to grow and fester. Brennan had read about the torture method and had always wanted to try it out. 

Silent tears streamed down Raphael's cheeks at the new pain when he woke. “Kill me,” he mouthed.  
“Soon, Raphie,” Brennan said. “You're going to die today.”  
“Good,” Raphael mouthed. “I’m ready ta die.”

Brennan got a large chainsaw, rolled Raphael onto his plastron and cut out a large chunk of his shell. As the shell was severed from his body and white spots flashed before his eyes, Raphael silently screamed and bit his tongue. Blood seeped into his mouth and dribbled down his chin. All of the torture had been bad, but this…This was the worst torture he’d ever endured. A part of him had been cut away. Fuck. Make the pain stop, he thought. Brennan turned him back onto his injured carapace and showed him the piece of shell he held in his hands. “Lovely, isn’t it Raphie? I’ll check on you later." Brennan shoved the piece of shell into a bag and said, “This is beautiful. I'm going to eat you and hang your shell on my wall when you die, Raphie. Later."

Raphael’s frail body decided it had had enough, his breathing slowed down and his golden eyes slid shut. I love ya, Leo, and the kids, he thought, before the darkness consumed him.

The lion had been watching Raphael ever since he'd arrived there and now in solidarity with a fellow animal, it summoned up the last of its strength and let out a mighty roar, hoping that someone would come and save them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this the end of Raphael?


	18. Reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kane finds a piece of Raphael's shell in Brennan's bag and the brothers add two and two together and set out to rescue Raph!

Brennan went to the shops and bought groceries. Returning to Jared’s home, (he’d moved out of his, knowing that he’d soon be evicted for not paying his rent), he checked on the turtle. Raphael’s eyes were closed. Good. He's dead, Brennan thought. I’ll slice him up when I get back. Brennan placed the box of chocolates he’d bought for Leo in his shoulder bag and headed to the lair.

XXXX 

Brennan saw Leo and the kids in the lounge. The baby was in his crib in Leo’s room. “Pwesent?” Kane asked.  
“Sorry, buddy,” Brennan said. “Not today. But next time, okay?”  
“Okay,” Kane said and returned to watching TV with his older brother.

“I do have something for you, Leo,” Brennan said, taking the chocolates out of the bag and handing them to him.  
“Thanks, Bren. That’s sweet. Can we go to the kitchen? There’s something I want to tell you.”  
“Of course.”  
Leaving the shoulder bag on the floor, Brennan followed Leo into the kitchen.

Kane got up from his place near the TV, wanting a drink of water, but seeing the bag on the floor, the curious child decided to look inside. Reaching inside, the tot soon found the piece of shell. “Oh. Pretty,” he said, examining it.  
Don happened to be walking past on his way to the kitchen and said, “What have you got there, Kane?”  
“It’s mine,” Kane said, clutching the piece of shell against his chest.  
“Show me. I’d like to see. Please.” The child held out the piece of shell to his uncle and Don’s eyes widened in shock and his jaw dropped. It’s from Raph’s shell. I’d know it anywhere, he thought. “Where did you get this, Kane?” he asked.  
“Bren’s bag.”  
“Give it to me, Kane. I’ll return it later.”  
“NO. Mine.”  
“Kane, please. I’ll give you some ice cream if you let me look at it, okay? I promise you’ll get it back.”  
The child scrunched his face up in thought and said, “Okay. But want back.”  
“Yes, okay. Go watch TV with Leo,” Don said, taking the piece of shell. I’ll get the ice cream in a bit.”

XXXXX 

Don raced to the lab. Then he texted Leo. “Meet me in lab ASAP.” And he sent a message to Mikey saying, “Sit with the kids in the lounge. I’m talking to Leo. Don't let Brennan leave the lair!"  
“Why?” Mikey asked.  
“He took Raph. Do as I ask.”

xxxxx 

Mikey left his room, went into the kitchen and said, “Hey, Leo. Don wants you in the lab. I’ll sit with the kids. Brennan, why don’t you join us?” Mikey was seething with anger inside, but he knew it wasn't time to act on it. “But I was talking to Brennan,” Leo said irritably. Every time he’d tried to break up with the guy, something prevented it from happening. “I know, but you can do that later, bro. It’s very important.”  
“All right.”

xxxx 

Mikey went to the lounge and plopped down onto the couch. His nephews immediately climbed onto his lap and Brennan sat down beside him. Mikey hugged them close and kissed them, thinking, I’m not a violent guy, but I’d REALLY like to kill this dude for taking Raph away from us and for hurting and possibly killing him!

xxxxx 

“What’s so important, Don?” Leo asked, entering the lab.  
“This,” Don said, holding up the piece of shell. “Look.”  
“It’s a piece of shell. So?”  
“Look closely. It’s not any shell. It’s…”  
Studying it, Leo’s face crumpled and he said, “Raph’s. Does that mean he’s dead? Where did you get this?”  
“I don’t know and Kane found it in Brennan’s bag, which means he took Raph. He’s been playing us, Leo, especially you.”  
“I’m going to kill that asshole,” Leo said, clenching his fists.  
“You can, but there’s a small chance Raph may be alive. We need him to tell us where Raph is.”  
“I doubt he’d talk.”  
“Then we have no choice, but to let him leave and follow him. He’ll lead us to Raph. Hopefully we’re in time, because I doubt Raph's got much time with that large chunk cut out of his shell. ”  
“If only I’d believed him….”  
“Leo, there will be time for guilt trips later. The priority's finding Raph.”  
“You’re right, Don, you were right that I still love Raph. I never stopped loving him and was just fooling myself. But it’s too late isn’t it?”  
“We don’t know that. Let’s not jump the gun.”

Leo went into the lounge, doing his best not to attack Brennan and said, "Bren, Dad wants us to do some extra training now and the kids need their nap, so would you mind leaving? I’ll see you for dinner if you’d like to come over.”  
“I can’t, Leo. I’m going out of town tomorrow for a bit. Work. That’s why I came over now.” He stood up and planted a kiss on Leo’s cheek. Leo resisted the urge to spit at him. “I’ll call you, though. Love you.”  
“Ditto.”

After Brennan had left, Leo said, “Mikey, you and Don hop in the van and follow Brennan, while I put the kids down for their nap and tell Dad where we’re going.”  
“Got it,” Mikey said. “Leo, do you think Raph’s alive?”  
“I don’t know. Hurry before you lose Brennan.”

xxxx 

Leo tucked his kids into bed and went into his father’s room. “Dad,” he said. “We’re going out to find Raph. Brennan took him. I’ve put the kids to bed, but please keep an eye on them.”  
“Be careful, my son,” Splinter said. “And bring Raphael home. Good luck.”

xxxx 

Leo ran out of the lair and got a call from Mikey, saying where their location was. Running as fast as he could, Leo soon caught up with the guys and climbed into the van. Please let us find Raph alive, Leo thought. I can’t lose him. Not again.

XXXX 

Raphael was still hovering between life and death and a vision appeared to him, a little girl turtle, who couldn’t be older than two. “Daddy,” she said.  
“Who are ya?” Raphael asked. (he could talk In his dream.)   
“Your daughter. You were gravid six months after Kane hatched, but lost me after a battle with Shredder. You were three weeks along. Remember, Daddy?”  
“I’m seein’ things. I’m dead, ain’t I?”  
“No, Daddy. My name’s Rebecca. You were going to call me that if I was a girl. You’re not seeing things and you’re not dead.”  
“I should be after all that happened. Why ain’t I? Why hasn’t God killed me?  
“Daddy, it’s not your time and Daddy’s going to find you soon. You have to hold on. He’s on his way to find you.”  
“The pain's too much. I can’t…”  
“You have to. My brothers need you. Please, Daddy, hold on. Try…”  
“It hurts so bad.”  
“I know, but they’re going to find you and you’ll get better. Please. Will you try?”  
“I can’t.”  
“Don’t be so stubborn. Fight, Daddy! Fight for Daddy and my brothers. Please, please. The road ahead will be long, but you’ll get better and Daddy will be by your side, like he’s always been. He loves you so much.”  
“Leo loves me? I thought he hated me.”  
“Nope. He was just angry with you, but he’s NEVER stopped loving you. You guys can sort things out and be a family again. Fight, my brave daddy. You can do it. I love you.”  
“I’ll try,” Raphael said and gritted his teeth. “But I can’t hold on much longer. I’m so very weak.”  
“I’ll stay with you until they come, Daddy. You’re not alone.” The girl sat down beside her dad and took his hand.

xxxxx 

Leo and his brothers followed Brennan to Jared’s house, but Brennan decided not to go in. Instead, he changed his mind and went in a different direction. “Bastard’s not coming in,” Leo said.  
“Leave him, Leo,” Don said. “We’ll get him soon enough. Let’s get Raph.”

Don picked the lock with a paperclip he always kept in his belt and the brothers cautiously went inside and drew their weapons. The aroma of death instantly hit their nostrils and they gagged. “Oh, shit. Do you think it’s Raph?” Mikey asked fearfully.  
“I don’t know, Mikey,” Leo said. “I hope not. I swear I’m going to….”

“Who the fuck are you green jerks?” Jared boomed, coming out of his bedroom. He’d been on the way to the bathroom when he saw the turtles. Leo stepped forward, wielding his katana menacingly and said, “Where’s Raphael?”  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, little green man.”  
“I think you do. Where is he?” Leo demanded, nodding at Mikey and Don, who slowly moved until they were behind the man. Mikey lunged forward and gripped the man in a strong headlock. Jared tried to free himself, but Mikey was too strong. Leo pressed the blade of his katana against Jared’s neck and said, “Where's Raphael?”  
“Oh, you mean the little freak I fucked? He’s probably dead, given how much fun me and my cuz had. You can kill me, but he’s already dead, so it’d be pointless.”  
“WHERE IS HE?” Leo pressed the blade harder against the villain’s neck and blood trickled down it.  
“In the basement,” Jared said calmly. “I DON’T fear death, so you don’t scare me, but I’m warning you that turtle’s dead. Impressive little shit. He lasted far longer than any of our other victims. My name is Jared Winters and me and my cuz, Brennan Worthington, are serial killers. We’ve killed thirty-two people and loved it.”

Leo had no more time for the creep. Running his blade through the guy’s body, Leo neatly sliced his body in half and watched, as it fell to the ground. Jared was dead before that happened, his eyes rolling in the back of his head and his life source gushing onto the ground.

xxxxx 

Leo and his brothers left the psycho and rushed down to the basement. The smell of death assaulted their senses again, but Leo ignored it, focusing only on the green body on the floor. “Raph. Oh, Raph,” he said, dropping to his knees and taking Raphael’s hands in his. “Please be alive.” Leo checked for a pulse and said, “He’s alive, guys. Barely.”  
“Looks like he’s lost a lot of blood,” Don said. “We’ll have to move him fast. Mikey, Leo, help me.”  
“What about Brennan?”  
“Forget him. We’ll deal with him another time.”

“What about the lion, Don?” Mikey asked.  
“We’ll call animal control when we get home. Hurry.”

xxxx 

The brothers carried Raphael into the van and laid him on a stretcher that they kept in the back. Don drove, while Mikey sat in the back with Leo and Raphael. Leo clutched Raphael’s hand in his and stroked his head. “Stay strong, Raph,” he said. “We’ll be home soon.”

Raphael’s eyes fluttered open and he said weakly, “Leo? I thought I heard ya. Am I dreamin’?”  
(His voice has returned, but it's weak and raspy) “Oh, Raph,” Leo said and sighed in relief. “I’m here. You’re going to be fine.”  
“No, Leo. I held on ta see ya, but I can’t no more. There's too much pain. Tell the boys I love them. Know I’ll love ya always and I’ll watch over ya and our babies. Thank ya for all the love and good times we had.”  
“NO!” Leo screamed, as Raphael’s golden eyes closed. “NO.”

“Is he dead, Leo?” Mikey asked fearfully. “Raphie can’t be dead. We need him.”  
“He’s gone into cardiac arrest. No, no, Raph. No. Don’t go. I love you. We need you. The kids need you. I need you. NO!”  
Leo placed his mouth to Raphael’s and began artificial respiration. When that didn’t work, Leo used the defibrillator that Don had somehow managed to get and applied it to Raphael’s body. “Come on, Raph. Come on. You can do it. Please.”  
“Is there anything, Leo?”  
“No. I’ll keep trying. Raph….”  
Don gripped the steering wheel so tightly, his knuckles went white. Raph, fight, he thought, blinking back tears. Don’t die. Please. Your babies need you so much and so do we. Please come back, Raph!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where can Brennan have gone? Will they meet him again?


	19. Raph wakes up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raph wakes up, but what are the extent of his injuries?

Two minutes away from the air, Leo said, “Raph’s pulse is back, but he’s still comatose. Wake up, Raph. Please,” Leo begged,his tears falling onto Raphael’s plastron. “Don, drive faster.”  
“We’re nearly there, Leo.”  
“Raph will wake up, won’t he? Please say he will. I shouldn’t have trusted Brennan. Raph, don’t leave me.”  
“I don’t know, Leo.”

Mikey took Leo’s hand, squeezed it and said, “Leo, stop blaming yourself. Raph will pull though, bro. He’s strong and you guys will work things out and will be a family again. I know you will, bro. Believe in that. Raph will fight this.”

xxxxx 

They arrived home and the brothers carried Raphael into the infirmary and placed him onto the gurney. Don hooked him up to a drip and Leo watched sadly, as his ex-mate lay there, looking extremely small and frail. Mikey had gone to tell their father that Raphael was home. Don examined Raphael and said, “He has multiple injuries, Leo, and it’s a testimony to his strength that he’s survived this long. Anyone else would have succumbed to them. The damage to his shell alone, would have sent him into shock. His limbs have been twisted to such an extent that he probably can’t use them. Hopefully, it’s temporary. He has multiple rib fractures, cuts, cigarette burns and acid burns to his body. Inspecting Raphael’s body, Don noticed tiny bamboo bits under the nails and in the festering sores. “The old bamboo torturing technique,” he said sadly. “Bastards,” he added, as he began to remove the bamboo with a pair of forceps. “My poor Raph,” Leo said. “How could those assholes do this to him?”  
“People like Brennan and Jared have no conscience, Leo, and thrive on sadism.”  
“But how does one become a psychopath? How can people do that to others?”  
“There are many theories…”

“My son,” Splinter said, suddenly appearing in the infirmary with Mikey and going over to Raphael. “My precious son,” Splinter said miserably, taking Raphael’s hand in his. “Fight and come back to us. You can do it, my son. He will pull through, won't he, Donatello?”  
“Dad, I have to be honest and tell you that it’s unlikely. He’s sustained many horrific injuries. Death would probably be a blessing, because he's going to experience excruciating pain and the recovery will take months if he wakes up. That's just physical. The emotional and mental scarring could take years and he may never recover.”

“But you said he'd make it, Don,” Leo snapped.  
“I never said that. We’ve brought Raph home and done all we could. It’s up to him now and we'll have to let him go if he can't fight this." br /> “No. I’ll never accept that. Raph, I’m talking to you. Fight. Don’t quit. Fight. I don’t want to lose you. Please,” Leo said and sobbed uncontrollably. 

Mikey threw his arms around Leo and he buried his face into Mikey’s shoulder. “Sh, Leo,” Mikey said. “I have faith he’ll make it. You have to have faith, bro.”

“What are his injuries?” Splinter asked, dreading the answer, but needing to know.  
Don filled him in and added, “Raph’s also severely dehydrated, been starved and he’s covered in his own filth.” Don began to clean the sores and disinfect them. “Good thing we found him. Another day and he’d have had gangrene and we’d have had to amputate….” Don let the sentence trail off.

“What about his shell?” Leo asked, pulling away from Mikey and glancing at Raphael. “Will it grow back, Don, or can you glue that piece on?”  
“I can’t glue it on and I don’t know. It could grow back. It'll take a long time if it does and it might not look like the rest of his shell. If it doesn’t, he’ll have a huge chunk missing forever.”  
“And then he couldn’t fight, because his spine would be exposed and one bad move could lead to imminent death.”  
“Yes and he still won't be able to fight, even if it grows back. Not until he’s mentally and physically recovered.”  
“Raph will hate being confined to the lair.”  
“I know. He's also been raped and those injuries will also take a long time to heal.”  
“They raped my strong Raph? My Raph?”  
“Yes, Leo. They did just about everything they could to break him. I’m not sorry Jared’s dead and I'd kill Brennan if I saw him right now!”  
“Get in line!”  
“I’ve cleaned Raph up. Now all we can do is pray that he recovers.”  
“He will,” Leo said fiercely. “My Raph’s not a quitter. I’ll sit with him. You guys go grab something to eat.”

“You should eat something, Leonardo,” Splinter said. “When was the last time you ate?”  
“This morning. I’m fine, Dad. How are the kids? I’ve been worried about Raph, I…”  
“The children are fine. I will….”

Kane ran into the infirmary and shrieked when he saw Raphael. “Daddy!” The little boy had woken up and gone looking for his grandpa and hearing voices from the infirmary, had gone there. Leo jr had gotten up too, and followed him. “Take the kids out,” Mikey said. “They shouldn’t be here.” He tried to pick up Kane, but the boy kicked out at him and screamed, “Daddy! Wake up.”

“Daddy!” Leo jr said. “Daddy.”  
“Come on. Let’s go,” Splinter said, grabbing Leo jr's hand. “Kane, come on.”

“NO!” Kane said, finally scrambling away from Mikey and climbing onto the stretcher and onto Raphael’s plastron before anyone could stop him. “Daddy,” he said, nuzzling his face into Raphael’s neck. “Daddy.”  
“Leave him,” Leo said, moved by his son’s tenderness with his dad. “He and Leo have missed their dad terribly and need to be with him. Leo, go sit on the other side of your daddy.”

Leo jr obeyed his dad and climbed onto the bed, snuggling up to Raphael, his little hands stroking Raphael’s face. “Daddy, sleep?” he asked.  
“Yes,” Leo said. “Daddy’s sleeping, but he'll wake up soon. I promise.”

Kane kissed his father’s beak and said, “Love you, Daddy. Wake up. Wanna play. Daddy, play?”  
“You shouldn’t make promises that you can’t keep, Leo,” Don said sternly. “You know very well that….”

“ARGH! A voice roared, clearly in agony.

Everyone looked at where the noise was coming from. Raph. Is he really awake, Leo thought? 

Golden eyes flickered open, scanned the room and Raphael let out another scream. “Daddy!” Kane said and nuzzled his dad. “You’re awake!”

“Raph!” Leo shouted, racing to his side. “Oh, Raph.”  
“Quick. Get the kids out,” Don said. “Now.”

Splinter and Mikey picked up the kids, who struggled futilely in their grasps, and left the room. “Oh, Raph,” Leo said, grabbing his hand. “How are you feeling?”

“Raph, I’m going to give you some pain killers, okay?” Don said.  
“No. No pills,” Raphael said and gritted his teeth.  
“Raph, you need them. Please don’t argue. Can you move your hands and feet? Where does it hurt?”  
Raphael tried to move his limbs, but failing to move them, he shook his head. “Can’t. Hurts everywhere. The kids? Are they okay?”

“They’re fine, Raph,” Leo said.  
“Kane? Did Brennan hurt him?”  
“No. He’s fine.”  
Tears of relief slid down Raphael’s cheeks and he said, “I didn’t fail him?”  
“No, Raphie. Why would you think that? You’ve never failed any of us.”  
“ARGH!” Raphael shrieked, as another stab of pain hit him.

“That’s it, Raph. I’m giving you morphine,” Don said, injecting him. “It’ll help you sleep and dull the pain. Where’s the worst pain.”  
“My back,” Raphael said, not resisting the meds. “Brennan sliced into my shell and cut a huge wedge out. My spine’s exposed, ain't it?" “Yes. So I’m going to move you onto your plastron, okay?”  
“Fine. The kids?”

“Our babies are fine, Raphie,” Leo said. “All of them.” Don and Leo moved Raphael onto his plastron.  
“Ya sure? Brennan said he hurt….” The morphine started to affect Raphael and he closed his eyes. “Kane’s okay?” Raphael mumbled sleepily.  
“He's fine. Everyone’s fine. Sleep, Raphie. Everything’s going to be okay.” Raphael was asleep a minute later, his chest rising with each breath he took.

Leo watched him and said, “Don, he will recover, won’t he?”  
“It’s going to be a long process, Leo, and he’ll need all the support and love he can get. He probably also won’t be easy, because he hates being vulnerable and feeling like he’s a burden to people, so be prepared for that.”  
“I can handle him.”  
“We all will. You aren’t alone,” Don said, placing a hand on Leo’s shoulder.  
“Thanks for everything, Don,” Leo said gratefully.  
“You’re welcome. Come and get some dinner.”  
“No. I need to be with him.”  
“Ten minutes, Leo. Just eat something.”  
“Fine,” Leo huffed and followed Don into the kitchen. “Ten minutes and then I have to get back to him.”

xxxxx 

Splinter had managed to distract the kids by playing a board game with them in the lounge.

Rebecca watched her family from above and smiled down at them. "You did well, Daddy,” she said and kissed Raphael's beak. “You’re home where you belong and you’re going to get better, Daddy, and I know there’ll be a new addition. Sleep well, get your strength up and continue fighting. I love you and I’ll always be at your side, cheering you on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can Raphael ever fully recover from his ordeal?


	20. The making of a psychopath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Background on Brennan's frightening childhood.

Brennan had been about to enter Jared’s house when he had a funny feeling the turtles had followed him, so he went in the opposite direction, stopped outside a shop and called his cousin’s cell. Getting no answer, (Jared always answered), Brennan feared the worst and had decided that he wouldn’t go back. He entered the shop, bought disguises, went to the shop bathroom, donned the disguises and after leaving, paid in cash to stay at a crummy, cheap motel, where he sat on the bed eating takeout and watching TV. “I’ll still kill Raphael,” Brennan said. “I'll get revenge if he hasn't succumbed to his wounds and if those shellbacks killed Jared. My cousin was a fantastic guy and he didn’t deserve….

Suddenly, Brennan’s face flashed onto the screen. “And in breaking news,” the news anchor said. “Police discovered the body of twenty-six-year-old Jared Winters, who, together with his cousin, Brennan Worthington, are believed to have killed up to thirty-two people. Worthington is on the run and is wanted in connection with those multiple murders. He is believed to be armed and dangerous. Do not approach him if you see him. Call the police at….”  
Must be those fucking turtles, Brennan thought furiously. I bet they called the cops and told them about me. He’d been wearing a disguise when he paid for his room, so he didn’t think the clerk at the desk recognized him, so he decided to hunker down and get some sleep. I'll decide what to do and where to go in the morning, he thought. 

Brennan dreamt of the first time he’d witnessed a murder. New York, Sunday, 22 July, 10 p.m., 2002. A terrified six-year-old boy screamed, as his Uncle Nestor kicked and beat his wife, Leslie. “Uncle Nestor, please don’t. She didn’t mean it!”  
“Shut up, boy, or you’re next,” Nestor said and continued beating his wife. “I’m fucking sick of that dry meatloaf you insist on cooking every Sunday. It’s garbage and I’m tired of you lying to me. Where the hell do you go when you tell me you’re studying at home and when I come home, you're not there? I paid a visit to your boyfriend and he gave you up after our friendly chat. How could you cheat on me when I’ve done everything to give you a good life?” Nestor kicked her and she groaned in agony. “Boy, get me the carving knife.”

“Please don’t, honey,” Leslie begged. “I’ll be good.”  
“Boy, you get the carving knife or I’ll kill you too. Got that?” Nestor shouted. The little boy ran to the kitchen, grabbed the knife, went back to the lounge and handed the knife to his uncle. Nestor smiled savagely and thrust the knife into her abdomen. Brennan could still hear her screams in his dreams. Nestor kicked her one last time and then he turned to his nephew. “Boy, your turn.”

“Uncle Nestor, please don’t,” Brennan sobbed.  
“This bitch deserves to die, kid. You do it or I’ll kill you in your sleep.” The little boy took the knife and plunged it into her chest. She shrieked again, as her blood gushed onto the floor. “Beautiful,” Nestor said. “I love fresh blood. How’d that feel, kid? Don’t you feel powerful?” The boy trembled. “Answer me.”  
“Yes, Uncle Nestor. It feels good.”  
He smiled and ruffled Brennan’s hair. “Wait here,” he said. “I’m getting my chain saw.”

Even at six-years-old, Brennan knew his aunt was dying. There was so much blood. He didn’t know people had that much blood in them. “Honey,” his aunt said weakly. “Call the cops. Please.”  
He stared at her for a long time. He wanted to help, but was so afraid that that his uncle would hurt him if he did. Finally, he reached for the phone. “What the hell are you doing, boy?” Nestor grabbed the phone away and slammed it down.   
“She needs help,” the boy sobbed.  
"And she’ll get it. Stand back," Nestor yelled.

The horrified little boy watched, frozen in shock, as her blood splattered everywhere. Nestor wiped blood from his face when he was finished. “Satisfying. Come here, boy. Let me show you something.”   
Brennan went to his uncle, terrified that he was going to be next. Nestor cut open his wife’s head and scooped out a piece of her brain. “Uncle Nestor, is that her brain?”  
“Yes.” He held the brain out to the boy. “Go ahead and try it. Now!” Brennan tried it and gagged. Nestor laughed. “Good boy. You witnessed your first kill. How does it feel?”  
“Good.” Brennan really wanted to throw up.”  
“You’ll help me when I go hunting, kid, and you'll be a fine hunter yourself one day.” Nestor got garbage bags and they tossed Leslie’s arms, legs, body and head into them. They loaded them into the trunk, drove to the woods and buried them.

After that, young Brennan had developed the taste for brains and other disgusting morsels and had killed everything he could find. He especially loved slaughtering puppies; slicing them with his Swiss army knife and watching the light die out in their eyes. He and his uncle had killed twelve people together before Nestor had died of prostate cancer. Then Jared had revealed that he also loved killing people and they’d decided to become a team.

Brennan next dreamed of his favourite kill, which had happened a year prior. His friend, Gordon Filan, had screwed him over with a business deal, and friends or not, Brennan had decided the guy had had to go. Filan had arrived back at his place, gotten a beer out of the fridge and settled down in the lounge to watch TV, when he saw his front door open and Brennan enter. Filan didn’t know that Brennan knew he’d screwed him over, so he was unafraid and said, “Hey, Bren.”  
“Why did you rip me off?” Brennan demanded.  
“I didn’t, Bren. How can you think I would?”  
“I know you did. Jared told me. I believe him and I’m going to kill you. No one rips me off!” 

Brennan withdrew his Smith and Wesson, which had a silencer, from his holster on his hip and before Filan could say anything, he pressed the trigger and the bullet smashed into Filan’s temple, instantly killing him. Just for fun, Brennan shot him six more times. He looked at the corpse and saw that brain matter had landed on his right shoe and all over the floor. The brain tissue was a mixture of white and gray and slimy in texture. Brennan picked up a piece of brain and chomped contentedly. Not bad, but needs sweet chili sauce, he thought, before leaving and heading back to his cousin’s place, where he was crashing. 

Brennan woke, feeling sticky and horny. Thinking about killing turns me on, he thought, stroking his semi-erect cock, which was leaking precum. Man. I need a fix, he thought. I need to kill someone and to watch the light die. I need control of something. Brennan thought about a broken and terrified Raphael and stroked himself faster, until he came, spattering his seed onto the bedsheets. Panting, he thought, I’m going to wait a while until the reptiles least suspect I’ll attack. Then I’m going to finish Raphael off if he’s not dead, kill the others and take Leo and the babies with me. We’ll start a new life together. I do like Leo and I’ve never liked anyone before. Maybe it’s love? Heh. And people told me I can't love anyone, because I'm a psycho! The joke’s on them! Stroking himself again, Brennan thought about Leo and when he’d cummed, he smiled and thought, Raphael's probably dead. No one can survive what we did. Torturing him was the most fun I ever had, especially hacking off his shell. Hahah. It’ll probably never grow back and he's most likely paralyzed if he survived. Hahaha. I rock. Brennan closed his eyes again and fell asleep, dreaming of when he’d removed Raphael’s shell and the screaming that had followed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The scary thing is there are people like Brennan out there. They could even be your neighbour!


	21. Quadriplegia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raph gets life changing news.

Leo returned to the infirmary after a quick snack and kept vigil over Raph, sitting by his bedside. Shortly after seven the next morning, July 31, Raphael stirred and let out a loud roar of pain. “Raph, are you okay?” Leo asked anxiously, reaching out and touching his arm.  
“ARGH! Hurts. Argh! DON’T FUCKIN’ TOUCH ME, LEO!”  
“I’ll get Don.”

xxxxx 

Leo rushed into the kitchen, where his brothers had been feeding his three boys and said, “Don, I need you. Raph’s awake.”  
“I’m coming. Mikey, look after the boys, okay?”

xxxxx 

Leo and Don went into the infirmary and Don said, “Raph, where does it hurt?”  
“EVERYWHERE! Fuck.”  
“I’m going to turn you over, so prepare yourself. I need to give you something to eat and drink and to examine your injuries, okay?”  
“Whatever. ARGH.” Don flipped him over and Raph whimpered, searing pain running through his body. “That fuckin’ hurts, Don.”  
“I’ll give you some pain killers and then you must eat something. Can you feel your limbs?”  
“No.”  
“Nothing?”  
“No. Fuck. What does that mean, Don?”  
“What about if I touch you here?” Don said, touching Raphael’s lower leg.  
“Nothin'.”  
“I’m sure it’s….Let me give you something to eat, Raphie, and…” Don said, having a bad feeling what it was.  
“What the hell’s wrong with me? I wanna know. Tell me!”  
“Swallow these pain pills and I will.”

“Is he all right?” Leo asked.  
“Do I look all right, dickhead?” Raphael snarled. “It’s yer fuckin’ fault I’m like this. If ya’d only listened ta me…ARGH!”  
“You’re right,” Leo said miserably. “It is my fault. I’m sorry, Raph.”

“There’ll be time for blame later,” Don said, handing Raphael some pain pills and a glass of water. “Take the pills and I’ll examine you.” Raphael did as he was told and Don studied his injuries and said, “You have fractured ribs, various cuts and bruises, Raph. Those should heal in time, but it’s…” Don hesitated.  
“Tell me, brainiac,” Raphael demanded, glaring at him.  
“I’ve been examining your exposed spinal cord and it’s…There’s no easy way to say this, but not only can you not move your limbs, because of what those bastards did, but I’m…”  
“I’m a fuckin’ paraplegic?” Raphael yelled.  
“No, Raphie. A quadriplegic. You have no feeling above and below your waist. A paraplegic feels above his waist.”  
“GET OUT!” Raphael shouted. “Now.”  
“Raphie, this means…”  
“I have ta wear shit diapers and be dependent on everyone for the rest of my fuckin’ life. Fuck that. I wish I’d died. It woulda been better if I had. Now I have ta endure this hell and seein’ the pity on yer faces.”

“Raph, I’ll help you,” Leo said.  
“Ya won’t touch me. The only ones, who can go near me are my babies. The rest of ya can go ta hell, especially ya, Leo.”

“Raphael, as your doctor, I won’t leave you, so you can shove that attitude where the sun doesn’t shine,” Don said firmly. “I’ll bring you something to eat and we’ll discuss rehabilitation.”  
“Fuck rehabilitation. It won’t work, Don. Face the facts. I’m a quadriplegic and my life's gonna be diapers, bed pans,sponge baths and pity! Fuck that. It’s the pity I don’t want most of all and knowin’ I’m a burden ta ya all.”

“You’re not a burden, Raph,” Leo said, fighting back tears. “We all love you and will be here for you.”  
“Why are ya still here, Leo? Don’t ya have a psycho ta bang?”  
“Raphie….”  
“OUT! NOW.” Raphael said, squeezing his eyes shut, as tears slid down his cheeks.

Leo looked at his ex-mate despondently and left the room. “You’re harsh on him, Raph,” Don admonished. “He’s so sorry for everything and he already blames himself. I understand you’re hurting, but shutting Leo out….”  
“Can ya leave me alone, Don?”  
“No. You’re going to eat something. I’ll be back shortly.”  
When Don had gone, Raphael opened his eyes and said, “I wish I’d died. Fuck this. Fuck it. Just let me have a relapse and die or somethin’. I don’t want this kinda life. It’s embarrassin’ and demeanin’ ta a guy like me, who prided himself on his strength and independence!”

“Daddy,” Rebecca said, approaching the bed and staring at him. “Stop it. You can fight this. You’ve always fought. Why give up now?”  
“Because, little girl,” Raphael said snappily. “I can’t move or do nothin’. This is my life and I hate it. Bein’ dependent on everyone's humiliatin’.”  
“So fight, Daddy. Give it your all, instead of whining, like a little boy who didn’t get his cookies and milk!”  
“Ya little…How dare ya talk ta me like that!” Raphael hissed.  
“Someone has to and to make you see sense. Where’s your fighting spirit? Gone? If you don’t fight and try to get better, those psychos won, Daddy. Do you want them to win?”  
“No. I hate them and I’d like ta break their necks,” Raphael said furiously.  
“That’s the Daddy I know and love. So, Daddy, if you want to get revenge, you aren’t going to do it by sitting here and crying, are you? And also, my brothers need you, so get off your sorry ass and fight! Do the rehab and whatever it takes, so you can get better! Stop acting like a quitter and a loser!”  
“Man, Yer tough!”  
“I should be. I take after you in looks and attitude, so do what I said, Daddy. You can do it. Will you try?”  
“Yeah.”  
“And stop being so hard on Daddy. He loves you. Talk to him.”  
“I ain’t ready ta talk ta him, Rebecca. I got enough ta deal with right now.”  
“But you will….”

“Who are you talking to, Raph?” Don said, entering the room with a bowl of soup.  
“My daughter, Rebecca. Ya know the one I miscarried after that battle with tin can. It woulda been a girl if she’d lived and Leo and I loved the name Rebecca. She’s been watchin’ out for me. Can ya see her? She’s standin’ right near the bed.”  
“I don’t see anything, Raphie. Here’s some soup,” Don said, lifting Raphael’s head up and feeding him.  
Raphael swallowed and said, “I ain’t imaginin’ it. My daughter’s here.”  
“I don’t believe in ghosts and it’s understandable you’d see things. You’re suffering from PTSD and...”  
“Don’t fuckin’ patronize me, Don! I know what I heard and saw. I ain’t crazy.”  
“Heh. Eat your soup, Raphie. Then you can sleep.”  
“Don, do you believe in the afterlife?”  
“Nope. Do you?”  
“Yeah. I know I saw and spoke ta my daughter. I never believed in it before, but I do now.”  
“Eat your soup, Raph,” Don said, spooning soup into Raphael’s mouth.  
After swallowing, Raphael said, “Where do ya think we go when we die?”  
“We just simply stop existing. That’s what I think. I’m a scientist, Raph, and I don’t believe in Heaven or hell. There’s no proof of each and I need cold, hard facts. Give me proof and maybe you’ll change my mind. Eat up. We’re nearly done.”

Raphael dutifully finished the soup and said, “Now what, Don?”  
“I’ve asked April to bring over some adult diapers. I know it’s embarrassing, Raph, but would you like to pee on yourself instead? She’ll be here in a while. You get some sleep in the meantime.”  
“And rehab?”  
“We’ll start it after lunch today if you want.”  
“I do want. I ain’t gonna stay this way forever, Don. I’m gonna walk again and play ball with my boys. Take them hikin’, fishin’ and stuff like that.”  
“What changed your mind about rehab?”  
“Rebecca and my boys. I need ta fight and ta be strong for them. They need me.”  
Don rolled his eyes and said, “Rebecca was just a mass, not even….”  
“Don’t ya say it, Don!”  
“I’ll see you just now.”

She does exist, Raphael thought angrily, shutting his eyes. I wasn’t seein’ things. My daughter’s here with me and is always with me. I know she is. Screw Don and his science brain. And screw Leo too. I ain’t ready ta talk ta him. I only want my boys 'round me and I suppose Don, because he has ta look after me. And Brennan? If yer still out there, I’m gonna get ya and kill ya with my bare hands, so enjoy yer remainin’ days on earth while ya can! With that last thought, Raphael fell fast asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Raphie and poor Don. Don has so much on his plate: inventor, doctor, therapist and a host of other things.


	22. Don breaks down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don cracks, Raph bonds with his babies and Raph and Leo talk.

Raphael was woken by Don fifteen minutes later. “Raphie, I have the diapers,” Don said. “I’m sorry. I know how humiliating this must be.”  
“Ya know jackshit,” Raphael said irately. “Ain’t ya goin’ through it.”  
“You have a point. I need to give you a sponge bath first and..." br /> “How are my babies? I wanna see them.”  
“They’re good. You can see them when we’re done. It's not fun for me either seeing you like this, Raph, but I need to wash you and…”  
“Get it over with already.”

Don fetched a basin of warm soapy water from the bathroom and began to wash his brother. Raphael squeezed his eyes shut, hating every moment. I was a strong ninja. Now I’m a pathetic sack of shit, he thought. Helpless. Pathetic. Vulnerable. Everythin’ I never wanted ta be. “April’s brought a machine,” Don said. “And we’ll do some leg strengthening with it, as well as arms, so you don’t lose your muscle mass.”  
“A machine? The bars the doctors use on cripples at hospitals ta help them walk again?”  
“Yes. And weights and all kinds of things to keep your…”  
“Am I gonna walk again, Don? I want ya ta be honest.”  
“Some quads do recover, Raph. It took one guy seventeen years to recover and now he has a racing licence and runs in marathons.”  
“Wow. Then I can, right?”  
“I don’t want you to get your hopes up. It’s very likely you won’t.”  
“But I could? I’m determined and stubborn and all that jazz and I could, right?”  
“There’s a tiny chance you could, Raph, but you shouldn’t get your hopes up.”  
“Hope's all I got and I’m gonna cling ta it. Ya can’t deny me it. That and my kids are the only things keepin’ me goin'. Do ya understand?”  
“Yes. There. I’m done,” Don said, setting the basin on the desk. Then he spread Raphael’s legs open and expertly diapered him. He’d changed the kids many times.  
Raphael scowled at the large diaper between his legs. Fuckin’ hate this, he thought. Please let me recover. I can’t be like this forever. I wanna play with my babies and be the dad they need.

Don looked at his brother and said, “April and Casey are outside, Raph. They want to see you.”  
“No.”  
“But Casey’s your best friend.”  
“NO. I don’t want him ta see me like this. No. Only ya and the babies can see me. And that’s final.”  
“Raph….”  
“I SAID NO. TELL THEM I’M SORRY, BUT NO.”  
“All right,” Don said sadly. “I’ll be back now.”  
“Bring my babies with ya.”

xxxx 

Don went outside and told Casey and April what Raph had said. “But I’m his best friend,” Casey said miserably. “Why's he shutting me out, Don?”  
“It’s not personal, guys. Raph’s broken and hurting and he just needs some time to deal with things. I’m sure he’ll change his mind when….”

xxxxx 

“DON!” Raphael yelled. “Get in here.”  
“Excuse me,” Don said and went into the infirmary. “Yes, Raph?”  
“The pain’s back. Can ya get me some pain pills?”  
“Yes.” Don got him some pain pills and gave them to him.  
“Thanks. Bring my babies.”  
“I will now. I’m just talking to Casey and April.”

After Casey and April had left a few minutes later, Don took the eldest two babies in to see their dad. “Hey, sweet boys,” Raphael said, his face lighting up. The first smile Don had seen since Raphael had arrived home. "Daddy," Kane said and nuzzled his neck. “Daddy, play?”  
“Can’t now, buddy. Daddy’s sick, but he will soon. I promise.”

“Daddy, flu?” Leo jr asked.  
“No, sweetheart,” Raphael said. “Somethin' else, but I'll play soon. Have ya boys been good?”  
“Yes, Daddy. But not Kane.”  
“What did he do?” Raphael asked and chuckled. “Were ya a bad boy, Kane?”

“Broke Daddy’s doll,” Kane said. “Accident.”  
“That’s okay,” Raphael said, knowing Kane was talking about a doll from his childhood. “I don’t care. It was just a doll and ya didn’t do it on purpose. It’s all right. What matters is ya sweet guys. Where’s Raphie?”  
“Sleeping.”

Don watched Raphael with his boys and smiled. Raphael was an amazing dad and so was Leo. The kids were very blessed to have them. I hope Leo and Raph talk and work things out, Don thought. The boys need a united family.

Twenty minutes later, Don said, "Right. Uncle Don wants to talk to Daddy. You boys can go watch TV with your Daddy and Uncle Mikey.”  
“Want to stay here,” Kane said, flinging his arms around Raphael's neck.  
“You can come back later, Kane, but I need to talk to your Daddy.”  
“Fine,” Kane huffed in annoyance and stuck out his lower lip in a pout, causing Raphael to chuckle.

“Slugger, yer so like me, it’s scary,” Raphael said, and smiled. “I did that a lot when I was a kid.”  
“You still do,” Don said and grinned. “Kane’s so like you, Raph. Just wait until he’s a teen. I bet he’ll be as difficult as you. He’s Dad’s revenge for all the trouble you caused.”  
Raphael laughed. “Very funny, Don.”  
“Boys, kiss your dad and go to the lounge.”

The boys did as they were told. Then Raphael said, “Okay, Don. I haven’t asked ya before, but I wanna know what the extent of my injuries are, besides the quadriplegia.” Don told him and Raphael silently listened. When Don was done, Raphael said, “Will I ever be able ta have sex again, Don?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“What do ya know, Don?” Raph demanded. “So far, all ya say is maybe and unlikely. Can’t ya give a cripple some hope?”  
“I can’t lie to you and do that, Raph. It would be unprofessional.”  
“Fuck! I ain’t askin’ as yer patient. I’m askin’ as yer brother. Don’t treat me like a damn patient with yer facts. I’m a livin’ breathin’ person and not an object. Damn it. I need ya ta be emotional. Not a blank wall! Doctors are so cold and I don’t want that.”  
“How’s this for emotional, Raph?” Don demanded, tears in his eyes. “I’m fucking angry at the sick bastard, who hurt my big brother. I want to kill him. It breaks my heart seeing my strong, big brother lying there so helpless and there’s NOTHING I can do to fix him. I can fix objects and machines, but I can’t help my brother, who needs me, and I can’t give him hope, because there is probably none. That’s how I feel, Raph. So frigging useless and I’m sorry. I can’t give you what you need. I’m a scientist and not a doctor!”

xxxxx 

Don rushed out of the room, tears now sliding down his cheeks. I can’t look after Raph, he thought. Seeing my brother that way destroys me and I can’t be what he needs.  
“What’s wrong?” Leo asked. He’d been on his way to ask for an update on Raphael.   
“I can’t help…”

“DON!” Raphael yelled. “Don…”

“Go in there, Leo,” Don said. “Raph needs you.”  
“But he doesn’t want me. He wants you.”  
“I can’t help him. Leo. Not right now. Maybe later. I need time out. Seeing Raph like that…”Don choked back a sob and Leo placed a hand on his shoulder.  
“It’s okay, Don. What happened?”  
“He wants hope and I can’t give it to him, Leo. I’m a scientist. I deal in facts. I can nurse him and care for him, but I can’t give him the hope he needs. I want some time alone now. Please. I’ll come back later if you can’t…”  
“I got it. Go.”  
“So you understand?”  
“Yes. I’ll be with him. Go get some rest. You look exhausted.”  
“Thanks, Leo.”

xxxxx 

Leo squared his shoulders and went inside the infirmary. “Where’s Don?” Raphael demanded, glaring at Leo.  
“He needed a break.”  
“I don’t want ya here.”  
“Too bad I’m staying.”

Leo sat down on a chair by the bed and said, “How are you feeling, Raphie?”  
“Just peachy. How the fuck do ya think I’m feelin’, dipshit?” Raphael said sarcastically.  
“I have some good news. Jared’s dead and the cops are looking for Brennan.”  
“How'd the bastard die?”  
“I sliced his body in half. He bled out before he hit the floor.”  
“But Brennan’s still out there?”  
“Unfortunately, but I'll find him and will ensure he pays, Raphie.”  
“No. Ya won’t. That’s for me ta do. Not ya. How could ya have been so dumb trustin’ him, Leo?”  
“He seemed nice. I had no idea that he’d turn out this way. I’m stupid, I know. If I could go back in time, I’d...”  
“Even after I warned ya, ya still chose ta believe Brennan. Because ya thought I was jealous.”  
“You were.”  
“Maybe, but it wasn’t because of jealousy that I told ya, Leo. I told ya, because I knew he was trouble. My gut instinct and because of what I read online. My gut ain’t wrong, ya know. It’s saved us tons of times.”  
“I know that now, Raphie. I feel sick,knowing it’s my fault you’re hurt and that you may never walk again.”  
“I WILL walk again, Leo. Fuck Don and his facts. I’m gonna walk and…Ya believe me, right?”  
“I…”  
“YA DO, RIGHT?”  
“Raphie, I…”  
“Do ya believe me?” Raphael asked hopefully.  
Leo looked into Raphael's earnest face and said, “I know you want to walk again, Raphie, but it might not happen. No one can promise you that you will. It;d be cruel and unfair, especially if it didn’t happen. All that hope and then nothing happens. Do you understand?”  
“No. Ya don't understand," Raphael said evenly, his eyes flinty. “I need hope. It and the kids are all I got ta carry on.”  
Tears welled up in Leo’s eyes and grabbing Raphael's hand, he said, “You have me and I know you hate me right now, Raphie, but you have me.”  
Raphael rolled his eyes and said, “Do ya understand what I said?”  
“Yes and what I will say is.. If anyone can recover, it’s you, Raphie. You’re the strongest, most determined person I know.”  
“I can work with that,” Raphael and managed a small smile. “Why couldn’t Don say that?”  
“Give Don a break. He’s doing his best.”  
“When can I start rehab?”  
“Have a lie down and then we can.”  
“All right. Ya can go now.”  
“Nope.”  
“Hey, Leo? I don’t hate ya.”  
“You don’t?” Leo said in surprise.  
“I could never hate ya. Yer my babies’ daddy and a terrific one at that.”  
Leo watched Raphael close his eyes and fall asleep. I love you, Raph, Leo thought. I hope you can see that and know how much you're loved. Not just by me, but by the entire family too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone can recover, it's our Raph!


	23. The first shell transplant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don performs a ground-breaking operation that could be life-saving for the guys in the future.

Leo got up from his position beside Raphael’s bed and went in search of Don. 

xxxxxxx 

Finding Don in the lounge with Mikey and the kids, Leo said, “Do you have any books on psychology, Don, like what makes a person into a serial killer?”  
“Yes. I have plenty on my shelf in my room. Joel Norris’ The Killer next door is an excellent one.”  
“Thanks, Don.”  
“How is he? Still mad at me?”  
“No. Raph knows you’ve been under tremendous strain and you’re doing your best. Please don’t worry. Just relax and he needs you when you're ready.”

“Hey. I was wondering,” Mikey said from his position on the couch, baby Raphie in his arms. “They have all kinds of transplants, bros, from facial to penis, right? And no one thought they could be done, but they have been. One guy even wants to do a body transplant. Science has certainly advanced.”  
“What’s your point, Mikey?” Leo asked.  
“What about a shell transplant? Each one of us could give a section of our shells and Don could transplant it onto Raph. Dude, that could work.”

“You might have something there, Mikey,” Don said, impressed. “But the danger of that would be if Raph’s body rejects the shell, then we’re back to where we started.”  
“Raph’s been through enough right now,” Leo protested. “He needs to wait until he’s healed a bit.”

“I think it’s Raph’s decision, dude,” Mikey said. “There’s no time like the present. Come on. Don, you take baby Raphie. I’m going to see Raph.” Handing the baby to Don, Mikey raced to the infirmary eager to tell his big bro the news.”

xxxx 

Bounding into the nursery, Mikey said, “Raphie, wake up. I have some news to tell you.”  
Raphael opened his eyes and said grumpily, “What do ya want, Mikey?”  
“I have some awesome news, bro. Like you know the first penis transplant was done recently.”  
“So?”  
“So no one thought….”

Leo and Don entered the room, having gone to Splinter and he was caring for the children. “I think you should wait, Raph,” Leo said.  
“Wait for what?”

“Mikey thinks we could each donate an area of our shells,” Don said. "To attach to you, Raph, but it’s risky. Your body could reject it, get an infection and you could die.”  
“In my current condition I could die anyway, by gettin' an infection.”  
“True, but the shell transplant would be…I don’t know if it’d work.”  
“So ya’d basically glue it on?”  
“That’s right. I’ve never done it before. I want to donate some of my shell, but I can’t if I’m the doctor, so it’s down to Leo, whose shell color is very similar to yours. Mikey’s shell isn’t really your color and then there are the babies. Kane and Raphie have the same color shell as you, Raph. They’re very young and their shells will grow back fast, because it’s not a huge area I’ll be cutting out.”  
“No. Not my babies.They're too small." 

“Raph, it’s the only one way,” Leo said. “Don will take care of the babies. If it works, your spine won’t be exposed anymore and you‘ll be less likely to get an infection. I think you should do it. I know it’s risky, but think of the benefits.”  
“I don’t know. I’m worried ‘bout the babies. Raphie’s only two- months old, Leo.”  
“I know, I know,” Leo said, grabbing Raphael’s hand. “But think about this. If it works and if any of the rest of us have injuries to our shells, Don could perform this operation again and it'd help us. It could save our lives.”  
“So I’m the guinea pig.”  
“Yes, but…”  
“Will my injuries heal faster if I do this, Don?” Raphael asked.

“I don’t know, Raph,” Don said. “But it’s not good to have your spine exposed like that. And like Leo said, it could help us in the long run if you agree to do this.”  
“All right, but be careful with my babies. Please.”  
“I will. When do you want the operation?”  
“Today.”  
“Have you’ve eaten recently?”  
“Yeah. Not long ago.  
“It’s four p.m. now. We should do it tomorrow morning at seven, so no eating after seven tonight.”  
“Fine. Can I sleep now?”

“No, no,” Mikey said. “It’s my turn to be with you. Want to hear my latest joke?”  
“Do I got a choice?” Raphael said and groaned. 

“We’ll be outside if you need us,” Leo said, patting Raphael’s shoulder.  
“I wanna see the babies later,” Raphael said. “I haven’t seen Raphie. Please bring him.”  
“I will. Mikey, call me if you need me.”

“Okay, bro,” Mikey said. “Bye, guys.”  
“Bye,” Don and Leo said, as they left.

“Now where were we, Raph?” Mikey asked, plonking down onto a chair.  
“Ya were leavin’?” Raphael asked hopefully.  
“Nope. What’s green, then yellow, then green, then yellow?”  
“A yellow bellied turtle rollin’ down the hill. I told ya that one.”  
“Okay. What do you get when you cross a turtle with a giraffe?”  
“A turtle neck sweater! That’s my joke too.”  
“How about some people think turtles are poisonous, but I bite my nails all the time and I’m fine?”  
“Hahaha. That’s also mine,” Raphael said and smiled. “Ya need some jokes of yer own.”  
“Knock knock.”  
“Who’s there?”  
“I don’t know. I have no more jokes right now, dude, but I want you to know I missed you, big bro,” Mikey said, reaching out and squeezing his brother’s hand, tears in his eyes. “And I’m sorry for everything before.”  
“It’s okay, Mikey. Everythin’ is gonna be okay.”  
“If you’d died, Raph, all of us would have fallen apart. We need you and love you so much. Leo, especially. He’s been through hell and back.”  
“I love ya too, little bro. It’s okay.”  
“Are you and Leo going to work things out? You have to. You belong together.”  
“There can be love, but it ain’t enough sometimes, Mikey, okay?”  
“But it can be enough. You and Leo love one another.”  
“Maybe, but maybe it ain’t enough. I’m tired now, Mikey.”  
“Do you want me to leave?”  
“No. Stay with me and tell me a story, like Dad used ta tell us. Just until I fall asleep.”  
“Okay. There once were two turtles named Raphael and Leonardo, who lived in a magical kingdom.”  
“Ugh, Mikey!”  
“They were both stubborn as hell, passionate, strong warriors, who found love with one another and who soon had a young family.”  
“I want a different story.”  
“No. They fought a lot, but they still loved one another dearly. A lot of bad things happened, which caused them to drift apart and they went their separate ways. Raphael left the kingdom and thought he’d find a better life.”  
“I really don’t like this…”  
“Hush, bro.”  
“I'd slap ya if I could move.”  
“Raphael went through a lot and an evil man came to Leonardo’s kingdom, but Raphael was soon back, wanting to prove to his love how sorry he was. Leonardo was too blinded by the evil man and ignored his ex. The bad man kidnapped Raphael and did some horrible things to him, but Leonardo rescued him and brought him home.”  
“And how does it end, Mikey?”  
“That’s up to you, Raph. There are two endings. The bad man won and you and Leo never get back together or you swallow your stupid pride and tell him you still love him and your family’s whole once more. I know you love him, dude. I see the way your eyes linger on him and no one else when he’s in the room. You guys think I’m oblivious about things like that, but I see it, bro. All the time. And he feels the same way about you. Get some rest and think about it.” By the thoughtful expression on Raphael’s face Mikey could tell his brother was thinking about what he’d said.

 xxxx 

The rest of the day passed uneventfully and early the next morning, August 1, Leo, Kane and Raphie were wheeled into the infirmary. Don talked soothingly to the babies and then anesthetized them. “Ready, Leo?” Don said.

“Wait. I wanna say somethin’,” Raphael said. “Leo, if anythin’ happens ta me and I die, I wanna tell ya I don’t regret our marriage, the babies, nothin’. I had heaven on earth with ya and I’m sorry for everythin’.”  
“Me too,” Raphie,” Leo said, managing a small smile. “I wish things could have been different and I’ll always treasure what we had. I’m ready, Don.”

Don anesthetized Leo and he was soon passed-out. Don then carefully cut sections out of Leo’s shell and the babies’ and set them gently on a tray. Raphael looked at the pieces of shell and said, “Are my babies and Leo gonna be in much pain, Don?”  
“Some, but I only took small sections from the kids. Leo will be in more pain, but nothing morphine and pills can’t fix. Are you ready, Raph?”  
“I guess so.”

Don anesthetized Raphael and when he was out; Don took the pieces of shell and carefully glued them onto the exposed area of Raphael's carapace. He worked slowly and methodically and was finished three hours later. To his surprise, the shell had taken and the exposed area was now covered. There’s still a chance Raph’s body could reject the shell. We’ll know in a few days, Don thought. But this could be ground breaking for us if it works and help other turtles too.

A few hours later, the babies were sleeping peacefully, only having minor discomfort and Leo was dozing. Raphael and Don were talking. “So, was it a success, Don?” Raphael asked.  
“Yes. There’s still a chance your body could reject the shell, but if it doesn’t, it’ll fuse with the rest of your shell and your shell will look almost like normal.”  
“That’s incredible. And the babies and Leo are fine?”  
“Minor discomfort, but yes.”  
“So when I’m all better and walkin’ again, I could fight?”  
“In theory, yes. Get some sleep, Raph.”  
“Do ya think a couple can overcome anythin' if there's love?"   
“I don’t know, Raph. I’m not good at relationship advice.”  
“Mikey seems ta think people can.”  
“He’s a dreamer and a sap for happy endings. Me, I’m more realistic and deal with facts.”  
“So no?” Raphael asked disappointedly.  
“Every couple’s different, but who are we asking about here? You and Leo?”  
“Sh!”  
Don lowered his tone and whispered into Raphael's ear slits. “Yes. If anyone can, you two can. You guys are made for one another.”  
Raphael grinned and said, “Thanks, Don. That’s all I needed ta know. I’m gonna sleep now.”  
I’m gonna tell him I love him when I wake up, Raphael thought, closing his eyes. I want my family whole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to bring Mikey in. I'd been neglecting him. The jokes Mikey told are indeed Raph's jokes from the 1987 series in the episode called "Raphael knocks 'em dead". Think it's season 4 episode 16. In that series Raph's dream was to be a stand-up comedian.


	24. Healing hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After baby Raphie almost dies, Leo and Raph finally have a heart-to-heart. No violence here. Just tenderness and love.

Raphael woke later that day to the sound of frantic yelling. "What the hell's goin' on, Don?" he demanded.  
“Shit,” Don said, applying the defibrillator to little Raphie and pressing hard on his little chest “Come on, little one. Don’t die on us. Please don’t.”

“What’s going on?” Leo asked sleepily. “Don?”  
“It’s the baby, Leo. I came to check up on him and I found him not breathing. I’m doing all I can…”

“What happened?” Raphael asked. “He’s gonna be okay, right, Don?”  
“I don’t know. I think infection set in when I cut out part of his shell. He went into shock and his heart stopped. I’m doing all I can, but it doesn’t look good.”  
“Fuckin’ don’t give up on my son,” Raphael shouted. “Ya gotta save him, Don. Please.”  
“I’m trying.”

“Daddy?” Kane asked, waking. “What’s going on?”  
“It’s okay,” Leo said. “Baby, everything’s fine. Just stay in bed.”

Despite being in discomfort, Leo got out of bed and joined Don. The little baby’s eyes were closed and Leo felt no pulse. Blinking back tears, Leo said, “He’s gone, isn’t he, Don?”  
“I think so, Leo. I’m so, so sorry. I….”

“He ain’t fuckin’ gone,” Raphael shouted, his face darkening. “Ya can’t just give up like that. I won’t let ya. Leo, ya take over and save our son if Don’s gonna quit on him.”  
“It’s not about quitting, Raph,” Don said. “I tried, but there’s nothing we can do. He’s so small and his body…”  
“Leo! Stop gawkin’ at him, like he’s dead. He ain’t. He’s just restin’ and he needs yer help. Leo, he’s dependin’ on ya. So am I! Fuckin’ do somethin’, Leo, or are ya gonna let him die? I’ll never forgive ya if ya do!”

“Daddy?” Kane asked again. “What’s going on?”  
“The baby’s sick,” Raphael said. “And yer dad's standin’ there like a statue and not helpin’ him. Move yer fuckin’ ass, Leo!”  
“Daddy, you said a bad word.”  
Lowering his voice,” Raphael said, “Baby, it’s gonna be okay. Yer dad’s gonna make Raphie better, ain’t ya, Leo?”

Spurred on by Raphael’s words, Leo grabbed the defibrillator from Don and got to work. After ten minutes, Leo was about to give up, because there was no change in Raphael jr’s condition, when he felt a heartbeat and saw the baby’s eyes flutter open. “Raphie,” Leo said excitedly. “Raphie, you’re back, my sweet boy.” Leo bent down and kissed his beak. “Oh, Raphie. You scared us.”  
“Told ya, Leo,” Raphael said. “He’s too much like me ta just give up and die. Who says bein’ stubborn don’t pay? I wanna see him.”

Don hooked the baby up to an IV and moved his bed near Raphael, who studied him and said, “He’s gonna be okay, right, Don?”  
“I’m not sure, Raph and Leo. I’ll keep an eye on him.”  
“I hope it’s a better eye than before. He coulda fuckin’ died on yer watch!”

“Whoa, Raph,” Leo said. “Let’s….”

“Daddy?” Kane said. “Why are you fighting?”  
“Are you feeling better, Kane?” Don asked, not wanting an argument and feeling the parents needed to talk. “Any pain anywhere, Kane?”  
“No.”  
“Then how about you come with me and we can watch a movie.”  
“Is the baby okay?” Kane asked, looking at his sleeping baby brother.  
“He should be. What do you say?”  
“Can I, Daddy?” Kane said, looking at his parents.

Leo nodded and said, “Yes, but no running around. Your wounds are still tender and you could hurt yourself.”  
“Okay, Daddy.”

After Kane and Don had left, Leo said, “You need to stop giving Don such a rough time. He tries his best and all you do is scream at him, Raph.”  
“Ain’t much else I can do,” Raphael said flatly. “Besides, if I hadn’t shouted at ya or him, the baby would be dead. I didn’t give up on him, like ya morons.”  
“All right. You win, Raph.”  
“Wow. The great Fearless actually admitted I was right. That musta taken a dent ta yer ego.”  
“I think your ego’s big enough for the both of us,” Leo retorted. “And I’m not fearless, Raph,” Leo said, sitting down on a chair. “Many things scare me.”  
“Like what?”  
“Losing the kids, our family and you. I thought we’d lost you when Brennan went all mental and I was out of my shell with worry.”  
“So did I and I wanted ta die. The pain was so fuckin’ intense, but then Rebecca showed up and told me ta fight, so I gave all my all.”  
“Rebecca?”  
“Our daughter.”  
“I don’t understand…”  
Raphael rolled his eyes and said, “The baby I miscarried. She showed up twice and told me ta fight.”  
“But she was just a mass when you miscarried, Raph. How's that possible and showed up how?”  
“Just appeared. I saw her and I ain’t crazy, Leo. We were gonna name the baby Rebecca and she said that was her name.”  
“Are you sure you really saw her and didn’t imagine it?”  
“As sure as the shell on my back. She was real.”  
“How are you feeling?”  
“Yer dismissin’ me, Leo, and I don’t like it. Ya think I’m insane and made it up.”  
“I don’t believe in ghosts. I think you saw what you wanted to see. Have you run it by anyone?”  
“Only Don and he was as pessimistic as ya.”  
“Don’t tell anyone else. It’s loony. Now, how are you feeling?”  
“I thought it was nuts too, but wait until she shows up for ya. Ya will change yer mind.”  
Leo laughed and said, “I doubt it. Do you need me to…?”

Raphael blushed and said, “Yeah. I think so.” Leo moved the sheets and expertly cleaned Raphael with a cloth and put a fresh diaper on him. “There you go,” Leo said. “Do you need anything else, Raph?”  
“I’m a little hungry and I wanna hold the baby.”  
“Not tonight. He has to rest, but I can get you some food.”  
“Shouldn’t ya be restin’, Leo?”  
“I’m okay. I’ll be back with your food, Raphie.”

When Leo returned with a bowl of cheesy pasta, he fed Raphael, who swallowed and said, “Thanks for all yer doin’, Leo.”  
“You’re welcome. When you’re feeling better, we’ll do some exercises and try to strengthen your muscles.”  
“I’m gonna walk again. Rebecca says I’m a fighter and strong.”  
“What else does this Rebecca say?”  
“That we’re gonna have another baby.”  
“Is that so? Did she say which gender? She seems to know so much, I’d be amazed if she didn’t know,” Leo said sarcastically.  
“I’m gonna call ya doubtin’ Leo. I swear she said that and she said ya love me.”  
“I’ll have to hand it to her, she did get something right,” Leo said, spooning more pasta into Raphael's ’s mouth.  
“What’s that?” Raphael asked, after he’d swallowed.  
“You’re a fighter and strong.”  
“Oh,” Raphael said disappointedly. “Then Rebecca was wrong. But I’m gonna tell ya somethin’. I love ya, Leo, and I’m sorry for all I’ve done. I’ve fucked up so much. I destroyed our family and made ya sad and I regret it. If I could take back everythin’ and undo time I would. I had everythin’ and I fuckin’ blew it. I was a selfish bastard…”

Leo shifted his chair closer and covered Raphael’s mouth with his own, silencing him, while stroking his arm. Raphael’s eyes widened in surprise, but he eagerly kissed him back, inhaling his strong masculine scent of musk, mixed with mint tea and sandalwood. When the kiss broke, Raphael said breathlessly, “Is that a pity kiss, Leo?”  
“No, you fool. I love you. I always have and I never stopped loving you. I thought I wanted Brennan, but I didn’t really. I was reeling from everything and on the rebound and it took almost losing you to see that. You’re the only one I’ve wanted, Raphie, and the only one I’ll ever desire.”  
“Even like this? Hypothetically, what if I don’t get better?”  
“I’d still love you, Raphie, and I’d still be there for you as long as I live. I can’t imagine life without you and I don’t want to. You’re my missing piece, my heart and what keeps me going. My life began with you and it’ll end with you.”  
Raphael's eyes shone with happy tears and he said, “Leo, I love ya so, so much and yer the best thing ‘bout me. Ya gave me a family and love and a place where I belong and I’m so grateful. I know we have lots ta discuss and probably a long road ahead, but we can make it if we continue ta have love and communicate.”  
Leo nodded. “Yes, Raphie. We will make it, and I’ll never leave you. I promise. I want to be with you forever.”  
“Same here, Fearless. I’m everythin’ I am, because ya love me.”

Leo bent down, pressed his lips to Raphael’s and they shared another fierce kiss.

Up above, Rebecca clapped her hands and said, “Way to go, Daddy and Daddy!” She patted Raphael’s shoulder and said, “About time, Daddy.”  
Startled, Raphael opened his eyes and said, “Huh?”  
“Have fun, Daddy, and it’s going to be a girl.”

Raphael smiled and said, “I love ya, Fearless. Any girl names ya like?”  
“Why do you ask, Raph?” Leo asked, puzzled.  
“Just wonderin’. Hey. Don't stop. Keep kissin' me. We got a lot of time ta make up for,” Raphael said and smirked. Leo grinned and kissed him passionately. Eyes closed, Raphael thought, I kinda like the name Rachael and if we have another girl, Jade. I’m gonna get better and me and Fearless are gonna be together forever. Nothin’ will ever tear us apart again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awww. Finally they kiss and make up!


	25. Distressing news

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Raph get unwanted news that could change everyone's lives forever.

The same day, August 1, Brennan stretched out on his bed and closed his eyes. I have to move soon, he thought. But where can I go? My face is everywhere. His eyes lit up, as an idea hit him. He donned his disguise, left the motel and headed to his boyfriend’s apartment. After picking the lock, he went inside. Finding no one home, he snagged a beer and waited for his boyfriend to return home.

When Brennan’s boyfriend arrived home, carrying bags of groceries, he dropped them in shock upon seeing Brennan. “Bren!” Daniel Rosenberg said. “What a surprise and a pleasure. Where have you been the last few days, besides racking up your murder count?”  
“I bet it is. You look really great, Danny.”  
“So do you,” Daniel said, bending down and gathering up the groceries. When he was finished, he said, “What do you want? I take it this isn’t a pleasure visit.”  
“It is,” Brennan said. He strode towards Daniel and roughly kissed him on the lips. They kissed passionately until Brennan pulled away and said, “I still love you, Danny, and I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch the last few days.”  
“Yeah. Killing and conning people would take up time,” Daniel quipped. “I love you too, Bren. Seeing your name plastered all over the media worried me. I called you a bunch of times, but got no answer.”  
“Had to ditch my phones.”  
“You should have been more careful. I finally killed people,” Daniel lied, trying to impress his boyfriend. “Ten so far and no one’s suspicious.” Daniel had always been hesitant to kill people. He wasn’t ruthless like Brennan and he still hadn’t. “I’m impressed, Danny. You finally did it!” Brennan said and kissed him again. Then pulling away, Brennan said. “Have the cops interviewed you yet?”  
“Yeah, but I told them that I hadn’t heard from you in months.”  
“Thanks, Danny. I’m sorry I haven’t been in contact, but I love you. You know that, right? You’re my soulmate.”  
“I’m the only one who gets you, Bren. Hey. I heard on the news that Jared’s dead. I’m so sorry.”  
“Me too. Other than you, he was all I had. I’m pretty sure the turtles killed him.”  
“Turtles?” Brennan filled him in and Daniel said, “Do you like this Leonardo? Did you sleep with him?”  
“No. I’ve only ever been with you, Danny, but we could share him. What do you think? He’s hot. You’d like him, but we first have to annihilate the rest of his family. And then we can all move to the south or somewhere far away. What do you think? Make a fresh start?”  
“I’d go anywhere with you, Bren, but are you sure we can off these turtles? And that poor Raphael! He didn’t do anything wrong. Don’t you think….”  
“They killed my cousin. I loved him. They have to pay!” Brennan yelled.  
“How do we do that?”

The phone rang. “Hello?” Daniel said. “Yeah. This is he. I’ll be there now. Thanks, Dr. Moss.” Daniel disconnected the call and said, “Bren, I have to split. My doctor wants me to go there now.”  
“Bad news?”  
“I shouldn’t imagine so. I had my yearly physical last week and he wants to give me the results. I’ll be back later,” Danny said and planted a kiss on Brennan’s cheek. “We’ll discuss your plans when I’m back.”  
“Mexican for tonight? I’ll cook.”  
“Sounds great.”

xxxxx 

Daniel headed to his doctor’s appointment, went inside and sat down in the waiting room. When his doctor appeared, he went to his office and sat down. “So, Doc,” Daniel said. “What have you got to tell me?”  
“I’m afraid it’s not good news, Daniel,” Moss said. “You have HIV.”  
“W-what?” Daniel stammered. “You’re joking, right? I can’t have it. I’ve only ever had one partner and I’ve been faithful to him. Do the damn test again!”  
“You’re sick. I’m so sorry. I wish it had been a different outcome.”  
“How bad?”  
“There are drugs to stave off the symptoms. We’ll have to get you started on them right away.”  
“Do whatever it takes. I’m eighteen-years-old. I’m fucking way too young to die.” Fucking Brennan, Daniel thought, clenching his fists. He swore he was faithful. How could I be so fucking naïve and believe him?

The rest of the appointment was like a bad dream to Daniel, as he listened to the doctor, who explained what drugs he'd need to get. Taking his prescription, Daniel said, “Thanks, Doc. How long will the drugs prolong my life?”  
“I don’t know,” Moss said. “Could be five years. Could be twenty. Could be much longer, but make sure you take your medication every day, Daniel.”  
“I will. I don’t want to die. There’s still so much I want to do with my life.” Like taking it back, Daniel thought, angrily clenching his fists. Starting now.  


xxxx 

Daniel left, got his meds from a drug store and thought, Brennan deserves to be punished for handing me this death sentence and I’m done protecting him. I loved him so much and he cheated. Did he know he had this disease when he slept with me? How could do he that to me if he did? I’ve only ever loved him and been there for him. Heck. I even helped him cover up one of his murders and I’ve never turned him in, when I could have so many times. He has to pay.

xxxxx 

Daniel made an anonymous call to the cops, alerting him that Brennan was at his apartment. Then he headed down into the sewers. If this Leonardo had a relationship with Brennan, Daniel thought. Then it’s my duty to warn him that Brennan may have infected him with HIV. And if he has a family, they could all be at risk too.

xxxxx 

Sometime later, Daniel was shocked when he saw a figure up ahead. The figure saw him too, and stopped. “Who are you?” the figure demanded, stepping out of the shadows.  
Daniel gasped when he saw a sea green skinned, blue-eyed and orange masked turtle in front of him, wielding what he guessed were nunchucks, and looking annoyed. “Name’s Daniel Rosenberg. I was looking for Leonardo. Do you know him?”  
“Maybe I do and maybe I don’t, dude. Why are you asking?” Mikey demanded.  
“I need to tell him something. If you know him, please take me to him.”  
“I’m Mikey, Leo’s brother. What do you need to tell him?” Mikey asked, contemplating whether Daniel could be trusted.  
“I got diagnosed with HIV today and Brennan's the only one I've ever been with. If Leonardo….”  
Mikey’s eyes flew wide with shock at the mention of Brennan’s name and he sucked in a deep breath. “You know Brennan?”  
“My boyfriend, Brennan Worthington. He told me he was with someone called Leonardo, who lived in the sewers and I thought Leonardo should know about my status, especially as he more than likely had sex with my boyfriend and could be infected.”  
“You did right, dude,” Mikey said, placing his nunchucks back in his belt. “Follow me.”

xxxxx 

They headed back to the lair and when they arrived, Daniel saw little children playing in the lounge. They looked up when they saw him and came over to investigate. “Daniel, these are my nephews, Leo jr and Kane,” Mikey said. “Guys, meet Daniel.”  
“Oh. Are you a bad man?” Kane asked, studying Daniel.

“No,” Daniel said. “I’m not. You guys are so cute. How old are you?”  
“I’m three,” Leo jr said. “He’s two.”

“Kane, go get Daddy Leo,” Mikey said. The little boy raced off and returned a few minutes later with Leo.  
“Who are you?” Leo asked, narrowing his eyes and pulling his kids close.

“My name’s Daniel Rosenberg. Are you are Leonardo?”  
“I am. What do you want?  
“I dated Brennan Worthington and I just discovered that I have HIV. I never cheated on him, so it’s obvious he infected me. Brennan told me he dated you and I felt you needed to know in case you were infected too. I also alerted the cops about Brennan’s whereabouts. He came to stay with me, but I…He’s evil, so I had to tell the cops. And what Brennan did to you and your family…I’m so, so sorry, especially about Raphael. I loved Brennan, but when he told me what he did, I…I realized he needed to be locked up.”  
“Thanks. I appreciate your telling me. I need to go be with my family.”

“Leo, he just rolled on Brennan,” Mikey said. “His life will be in danger too, bro. Don’t you think he should stay here until Brennan’s locked up? He doesn’t seem like a bad guy.”  
“I guess, but you keep an eye on him, Mikey. I'm wary of people after what happened with Brennan. Come on, kids.”

xxxxx 

Leo left his kids with Splinter in his bedroom. Then he found Don in the lab and told him about Daniel. Don took a blood sample from him. 

xxxx 

Going into the infirmary, followed by Don, Leo said, “Raphie, Don needs to take a blood sample from you.”  
“Why?”  
“Brennan had a boyfriend named Daniel, who was diagnosed with HIV. He swears blind he was faithful to Brennan. Don took a blood sample from me.”  
“How long will it take ta know the results?” 

“April will come over later and pick them up," Don said. "And take them to a lab. We should have the results in a few days, Raph.”  
“And then what? What if me and Leo are sick?”  
“We’ll cross the bridge when that happens, but it’s quite possible that you won’t be infected. Just because Brennan has HIV doesn’t mean you or Leo will have it.”  
“Fuckin’ Brennan. Look how many lives he’s destroyed. I’d like ta ram my sai up his fuckin’ ass and now he’s potentially infected both of us? Fuckin’ prick. What 'bout our babies if we die?

“I didn’t sleep with him, Raphie,” Leo said. “I only kissed him, but I’m having my blood tested just in case. It’s pointless worrying until we know for sure. It’s possible, like Don said, that we don’t have it.”  
“And it’s possible we do have it. Yer only sixteen and I’m only fifteen, Leo. Way too young ta die.” Raphael started to hyperventilate, as he pictured his fatherless kids and Leo on his deathbed. “Raphie!” Leo said. "Calm down, Raphie!”  
“Don’t wanna die,” Raphael said, gasping for breath. “Wanna live.” 

Don looked at his panicked brother and said, “I’m sorry, Raph, but I have to do this.”  
Don injected Raphael with a tranquilizer and Leo said, “What did you do, Don?”  
“Gave him something to calm him down and sleep.”

Leo grabbed Raphael’s hand and said, as the medication began to take effect, “I love you, Raphie. No matter what happens, we’ll get through it.” Leo and Don left the room when Raphael had passed out and headed to the lounge, determined to get more information about Brennan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does Raph have HIV or did he get lucky and not contract it?


	26. Brennan's arrest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brennan's finally nabbed and the guys learn more about Brennan and Daniel.

Brennan was so sound asleep at Daniel’s place he didn't hear the front door open and the SWAT team enter. He was startled, when he suddenly heard, “Freeze!”  
Opening his eyes, Brennan was shocked to see several cops, their weapons pointing at him. “Whoa,” he said. “What’s going on?”  
“Brennan Worthington, we’re taking you downtown for some questioning in the connection of…” The cop started rambling off names of the victims.  
“Bullshit,” Brennan snapped, as he was handcuffed and led out of the house. “I did nothing. I’m an innocent man.”  
“Then you’ll have no problem telling us downtown!”  
“I’ve been framed,” Brennan yelled, as he was shoved into a police car and driven downtown to the station.

xxxxx 

Shortly after Don had taken the samples from Raphael and Leo, April and Casey arrived. They were introduced to Daniel and went into the infirmary. “How’s Raph doing, Leo?” April asked, studying the sleeping golden eyed turtle.  
“He’s freaking out. Finding out he’s quadriplegic and now that we may have HIV’s really doing a number on him.”  
“How are you, Leo?”  
“I’ve had better days and I’m scared, but it’s Raph I worry about. He’s so vulnerable and he started hyperventilating when he found out that we may get sick. Don had to sedate him.”

“Know we’re here for you, Leo,” Casey piped up. “If there’s anything you need and I mean anything, we’re here. It kills me seeing Raph like that.”  
“Thanks, Casey. I appreciate it and I know Raph does too. If Raph and I get sick, please promise me that you’ll be there for Mikey, Don and my babies.”  
“Of course, Leo. I love those munchkins like my own.”  
“Thanks. That makes me feel a bit better.”

“Do you have the samples, Don?” April asked.  
“Right here,” Don said, handing the vials of blood to her. “How long will it take before we have the results?”  
“A few days. Leo, try not to worry.”

“Easier said than done,” Leo said. “Thanks for everything, guys. Better not hug me April,” he added, when she tried to after giving the vials to Casey to hold. “Don’t want you infected if I have it.”  
“Leo, HIV's only transmitted through bodily fluids, like blood and semen. You can’t catch it from hugging and I know you need a hug.”  
Leo rested his head against her shoulder, as she hugged him and said, “Thank you. We’re grateful to have friends like you two.”  
“No problem,” April said, pulling apart. “Want me to cook tonight?”  
“Mikey has it under control, but thanks.”  
“Then we’ll be going. Stay strong and give my best to Raph.”  
“Will do.”

“Tell Raph I’ll be over tomorrow, Leo,” Casey said.  
“I told ya I didn’t want them seein' me this way, Leo,” Raphael groused, waking and glaring at his mate.  
“Too bad,” Casey said, before Leo could interject. “We’re buds and I'm staying now that you're awake, even if you don’t want me to. You’d do the same for me, Raph, so suck it up. The game’s on soon and we’re gonna watch, it like old times.”  
“But it ain’t like old times. I’m stuck in this bed. Go. Please. It’s embarrassin’.”  
“I’m not going anywhere, so swallow down your pride,” Casey said, laying a hand on Raphael’s shoulder. “I’ve missed you and we’re going to hang out and have some popcorn and beer. That is, if Leo’s fine with it.”

“No beer,” Don said quickly. “Raph’s on medication, but soda’s fine.”  
“Soda then,” Casey said. “Raph, it’ll be fun. You don’t mind if I stay over, Ape?”

“No, Case,” April said, “Fine by me.” April kissed him and said, “I’m going. See you all tomorrow.”  
“Bye, April,” everyone said in unison.

“What game’s on, Case?” Raphael asked.  
“Exhibition game between the Panthers and Seahawks at Wembley Stadium, London. I’ll get the popcorn or pizza. What do you want?”  
"Pizza and maybe ice cream after. Is that okay, Leo?"

"Of course," Leo said and tenderly kissed Raphael's beak. "We’ll be back in a few minutes.”

xxxxx 

Going outside, Don and Leo saw Daniel by the door. “Leo?” Daniel said. “I’d like to go in there and talk to Raphael.”  
“I’ll come with you. Case, you and Don go to the kitchen. I’ll be there shortly.”

“All right,” Casey said. “But the game’s on in forty minutes, so don’t be too long, please.”

xxxxx 

Leo and Daniel went inside the infirmary and Leo said, “Raphie, this is Daniel Rosenberg, Brennan’s boyfriend.”

Before Raphael could speak, Daniel said, “Raphael, Brennan told me what he did to you and I’m so, so sorry.”  
“Did ya know he was a psycho when ya got together?”  
“I did.”  
“Did ya know he murdered innocent people?”  
“Yes, but getting sick’s made me see things in perspective. I was protecting him and allowing him to kill again by not telling anyone. I’m just as guilty, even though I didn’t murder anyone. I’m paying for it, Raphael.”  
“Not like his victims. I saw a girl killed in front of me. A young girl, who wasn’t much older than me. Do ya know how old I am? Fifteen. Leo’s seventeen. Leo, I said ya were sixteen, but I know yer actually seventeen. I musta had a brain fart or somethin’. We’re kids and so was she. She had the rest of her life ahead of her and now she’s rottin' somewhere. I’m the only survivor. Lucky me, hey? Don’t look at me that way. I don’t need yer pity. Nor do I want it. Not by an asshole like ya. I don’t feel sorry that yer sick either. Ya deserve it for protectin’ that fuckin’ bastard. It don’t matter that ya loved him. Ya should have done the decent thing and gone ta the police the first time ya knew anythin’. But ya didn’t. Ya have blood on yer hands and nothin’ can ever wipe that off. He slaughtered thirty-two people. Countless lives have been destroyed and broken hearts all round, all because ya said NOTHIN’! Ya make me sick just lookin’ at ya. And it’s yer fault I’m like this. Do ya know what it’s like feelin' so fuckin’ useless? I can’t feed myself or hug my babies, and it’s killin’ me. It’s killin’ Leo seein' me this way and yer sorry now? Too late. Sorry doesn’t fuckin’ cut it.”  
“You’re right, Raphael,” Daniel said, hanging his head in shame. “I’m scum, but how can I fix this?”

“Perhaps Casey should go home, Raph,” Leo said. “You’re looking tired.”  
“Don’t fuckin’ baby me, Leo. I’m dealin’ with this jerk and yer gonna let me finish. Daniel, it’s simple. Ya go ta the police and give yerself up. Tell them what ya know. Fuck an anonymous call if that’s what ya did. Ya go ta the station and tell them what ya know. Be a man and fess up.”

“I’m scared, Raphael," Daniel said.  
“Yer lucky I can’t move, because I'd kick yer ass there if I could. And ya will go there. Ya wanna give closure ta people, who’ve lost their babies because of Brennan, don’t ya? I’m bettin’ that many relatives don’t even have bodies ta bury and sicko maybe told ya where some are buried.”  
“Yes, but I’m going to die, Raphael. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in prison.”  
“Ya owe it ta me, Leo, and all the people who’ve died, Daniel. Don’t ya want a clean conscience?”  
“Well, yes, but…”  
“My dad always told me that ya need ta atone for it if ya've done wrong. It don’t always make things right, but ya gotta try at least and show remorse. Ya will do it if yer truly sorry."  
“Wise man.”  
“He is.”  
“I’ll do it, Raphael. I don’t want to go to prison, but I need to. To atone for protecting him, but first, let me tell you about Brennan and his background.”  
“I’d like ta hear it, but it better not be a sob story ta make me pity him. I don’t.”

Daniel sat down on a chair and Leo did the same. “There are many theories about why people become psychopaths, Raphael," Daniel said. "Some say it’s due to trauma, mental illness and childhood abuse, but there are countless people, who’ve endured that and have never become murderers, so it all depends on the individual, I guess. Brennan didn’t have a shitty life. He had parents, who adored him, and he was a good student, but he was always troubled. His dad’s wealthy and when Brennan got arrested for abusing a sibling, his father asked the Governor to seal the record, because he loved Brennan more than his sibling.”  
“Sick,” Leo said furiously.  
“I suppose. My story’s different. I grew up in eight different foster homes and I never knew my bio parents. I was a troubled kid and student an we clicked when Brennan and I met. I witnessed his first killing. I was horrified, but I loved him and he was the only one who got me, so I never said a word. We spent every waking moment together after I ran away when I was fifteen. He was good to me and loved me, like no one had ever done. It was wonderful having that and I DIDN’T want to lose him. I never killed anyone myself. I didn’t have the guts. Brennan would come home and tell me about his killings. It nauseated me, but I loved him, so I said nothing to anyone else. But when I got sick and Brennan told me about Raphael, I had to change that and atone, so I called the cops and I’m so glad I did and Brennan…

“I don’t feel sorry for him or ya,” Raphael snapped. “Ya had choices, Daniel, and yer shitty life don’t excuse ya for protectin’ him!”

“Leo, turn on the TV now,” Mikey said, suddenly entering the infirmary. “Quick.”  
“What’s going on?”  
“Just do as I ask and turn to channel two, bro.”

Leo did as he was told and everyone gasped when they saw the news: “And in breaking news Brennan Worthington, a suspected serial killer, has been apprehended, thanks to our brave officers and an anonymous call that came through to the station.”  
“Raph, he’s in custody,” Leo said happily and kissed his mate. “Isn’t this fantastic?”

“Yeah,” Raphael said. “Awesome. No one else will lose their life, but it doesn’t let ya offa the hook, Daniel. Mikey, ya will go with him. It’s after dark and ya can wear yer disguise and take him ta the police station.”  
“Will do, bro.”

“Raphael, I’ll go to the station,” Daniel said. “Don’t you believe me?”  
“No. How do I know ya won’t do a runner now that he’s in custody?”  
“I promise…”  
“Not good enough. My brother will take ya and ya will stop arguin' if yer really sorry.”  
“All right, Raphael, and I’m sorry again. I hope you make a full recovery and you and your family are happy. You have gorgeous kids.”  
“If yer tryin’ ta butter me up by complimentin’ my babies, it ain’t gonna work. Get out.”  
“Are you always so hardass?”  
“Yeah. Ta those I despise. Take him outta here, Mikey.”

“Will do, bro,” Mikey said. “Want me to pick anything up for you, Raph?”  
“Don't want pizza. Changed my mind. Can ya get chili dogs?"  
“Anything else?”  
“Nope. Thanks, Mikey.”  
“Later, bro.”

xxxxx 

Mikey donned his trench coat and fedora and personally escorted Daniel into the police station, keeping his hat tilted down, so no one could see his face. “This is Daniel Rosenberg,” Mikey said. “And he has information on Brennan Worthington.”  
“Oh, yeah?” the cop at the front desk said. 

“Yes,” Daniel said. “I want to speak to someone about him and the murders he’s committed.”  
“I’ll get my boss,” the cop said and disappeared into the back. He re-emerged a few minutes later with his boss, but there was no sign of Mikey. He’d slipped outside and when he didn’t see Daniel emerge, he bought the chili dogs and headed home.

xxxx 

Don had put the kids to bed, so when Mikey arrived home with the food, all four brothers and Casey settled down in front of the TV in the infirmary and watched the game, while munching on the chili dogs. Leo watched his mate laugh, as he enjoyed the game. It’s good seeing him happy, Leo thought. And now Brennan’s locked up, we can move on with our life and heal. We’re safe and he’ll never get near us again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this the last of Brennan? Did Daniel give himself up?


	27. Daniel's return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel returns with a cop named Detective Joaquin Gonzalez, who wants Raph's testimony about Brennan.

Daniel sat across from Detective Joaquin Gonzalez in the interview room at the police station, and said, “In exchange for information on Brennan Worthington, I’d like immunity. I’m HIV positive and probably only have a few months to live. I’d like to live my remaining days in peace.”  
“Tell me what you know,” Gonzalez said. “And I’ll see what I can do.”  
Daniel spilled his guts and when he was done, he said, “That’s everything I know. I can take you to some locations, where the victims are buried. And there's a survivor, who was brutally tortured. His name's Raphael. I can ask him if he’d be willing to talk to you.”  
“Where does this Raphael stay and does he have a last name?”  
“I don’t know his last name and I can’t reveal his location.”  
“Why not?”  
“Because he’s not… He’s not human.”  
Gonzalez raised an eyebrow. “Are you telling me he’s an alien?”  
“Sort of. He’s… You have to trust me. He’s not human, but he and his family are good people. I can take you to him, but you can’t tell anyone his location and I’d have to blindfold you.”  
“Is this some kind of joke, young man? You want to take me to see an alien, but I can’t tell anyone where they are?”  
“That’s right. I know it sounds insane, but I’m telling you the truth. Raphael will give you more information to help put Brennan away for good.”  
“How do I know you won’t do a runner?”  
“I won’t. I want Brennan locked up too. Please trust me on this, Detective Gonzalez.”  
Something told Gonzalez that the kid wasn’t bullshitting him and he said, “Okay, kid, but I have to take two of my men as backup.”  
“No, no backup. You bring the cops and you’ll scare Raphael and his family. Just you. Please. I won’t do a runner.”  
Gonzalez nodded and said, “Come with me.”

xxxx 

It was late and there weren’t many of his men around, so Gonzalez and Daniel were easily able to slip out of the police station. “Climb down here, Detective Gonzalez,” Daniel said, pointing at a manhole. “The sewers really?” Gonzalez said in surprise.  
“Yes.”

They climbed down into the sewers and Daniel said, “It’s not far from here, Detective. Give me your belt. I need to blind fold you. I don’t need you harassing Raphael and his family.” Gonzalez allowed Daniel to blindfold him and they headed to the lair.

xxxx 

Don sprang out of bed, instantly alert, as the intruder alert alarm went off. “Shit,” he said, racing to his lab and staring at the security cameras. Intruders. Who can it be, he thought? It looks like Daniel, but who's with him? Got to get the guys.

xxxx 

“What is it, Leo?” Raphael asked sleepily, hearing the alarm.  
“I don’t know. I’ll be back soon,” Leo said and kissed his beak.

xxxxx 

Leo joined Don in the lab and said, “What is it, Don?”  
“Intruders approaching the lair. Get the kids, take them to the infirmary and stay there. Lock the door. Mikey and I’ll handle the intruders!”

“You bet we will, bro,” Mikey said, twirling his nunchucks.

“But I should help,” Leo protested.  
“No,” Don said firmly. “Your priority is your family. We'll handle this, Leo. Go now.”  
“Okay.”

xxxxx 

Don and Mikey opened the lair door and waited. Daniel and Gonzalez appeared a couple of minutes later. “What the hell are you doing here, Daniel?” Don demanded, wielding his bo. “And who's that?”  
“His name’s Detective Gonzalez. He’s working Brennan’s case. I brought him here to speak to Raphael.”

“Why, Daniel?” Mikey asked.  
“Because I thought Raphael could help with the case. He’s the only survivor and his testimony could help send Brennan away for good.”

“Can you untie me?” Gonzalez asked.

Ignoring him, Don said, “Raph’s been through so much already, Daniel. Have you any idea what he’s endured? He doesn’t need more shit. Take your cop pal and fuck off.”  
“Don,” Mikey said. “Don’t you think Raph should be allowed to make up his own mind? I know you’re concerned about him, bro, and so am I, but I think Raph should be allowed to decide for himself if he wants to talk to the police. I know he’d want to help with the case.”

“I agree,” Leo said, suddenly appearing.  
“Leo, I thought….” Don began.  
“Dad’s with the kids and Raph, Don. Let me talk to Raph. Stay here with them, guys.”

xxxxx 

Leo went into the infirmary and said, “Dad, take the kids to your room, please. I’d like a word with Raph privately.”  
“Of course,” Splinter said, picking up Raph jr. “Come, kids.”

“Wanna stay with Daddy,” Kane whined. “Please.”  
“Ya can come back later, squirt,” Raphael said. “I promise, but Daddy needs ta talk ta me now. Go with Grandpa. He’s gonna tell ya some stories and maybe he'll let ya watch a cartoon if yer real good.”  
“Okay. I love you, Daddy.”  
“Love ya too, baby. Go now.”

When Splinter and the kids had gone, Leo said, “Raph, Daniel’s here and brought a cop with him. He thought you’d want to talk to the cops about Brennan and help him put him away, but I'll tell them to go away if it's too difficult for you. You don’t have to do it.”  
“I do, Leo. I want him ta be locked up, so that he can never hurt anyone else. I wanna help get justice for all the victims and their families. I gotta do it, but it has ta be audio only for obvious reasons and that cop’s gotta stay blind folded the entire time.”  
“The jury will want visuals and we'll be hunted and we'll have to leave our lair if that happens. How will you get around that?”  
“I’m still a kid, right? The cop could say I that am and that I’m fearful for our family’s safety, so I don’t wanna show my face, but anyway, kids testify on camera with their faces fuzzed out. I could do that.”  
“All right. If you’re sureyou want to do this.”  
“I am. Get the cop.”

Leo joined the others and they all went back to the infirmary. Gonzalez was still blindfolded. “Can I take the blindfold off?” Gonzalez asked.  
“Okay,” Raphael said. “But ya gotta promise ya won’t tell anyone ‘bout us ever. We'll be hunted and locked up if ya do. Promise now. My brothers won’t let ya go if ya don’t promise.”  
“I promise,” Gonzalez said immediately. 

Daniel took off the blindfold and Gonzalez gasped when he saw Raphael and his family. “You’re a turtle?” he said in amazement.  
“No shit, “Raphael said dryly. “I hadn’t noticed. “I’m Raphael. That’s my mate, Leo, and that's Don and that's Mikey over there. And ya know Daniel.”  
“Detective Joaquin Gonzalez. Am I seeing things? I must be. Mutant turtles don’t exist.”  
“I ain’t no illusion. Can we start? I’m kinda tired.”  
“Are you prepared to go on camera, Raphael? And what did Brennan Worthington do? How did you come to exist?”  
“Our origin story ain’t important.”

“Raph, are you sure you want to do this now?” Leo asked. “It’s late.”  
“Yeah. Don’t baby me, Leo. I wanna do it. My brothers are stayin’ with me. It’s gonna be on camera with my face fuzzed out. I’m fifteen and that’s the way it’s done for kids, right? I also got a family I’m worried ‘bout and…”

Gonzalez nodded and said, “That’s fine, Raphael. You’re very brave to talk to me.”  
“Can we start? Don, get a video camera set up.”

Don did as ordered and the camera was turned on when everything was set up. Gonzalez said, "Raphael has agreed to talk about Brennan Worthington on condition that his face is fuzzed out. He’s only a kid and is entitled to that option and he’s also fearful for his family’s safety. Brennan Worthington is highly dangerous and he knows dangerous people, who would not hesitate to go after Raphael and his family. Raphael, are you ready?”  
Raphael took a deep breath and said, “I'm Raphael and I'm the only known survivin' victim of Brennan Worthington and his deceased cousin, Jared. I’m fifteen-years-old and no one should have ta endure what he did ta me and others. He tortured me with every kind of torture ya can imagine: from makin’ multiple incisions in my body and placin’ bamboo into them ta make them infected and hurt, ta the goat and salt torture, ta bindin’ my limbs with rope and makin’ them useless. But the worst possible thing he coulda done was slicin' through my spinal cord. I’m a quadriplegic. Fifteen-years-old and I can’t walk or run or hug my bros or my kids. I got three kids I love so much and it hurts me that I can’t hug them. They don’t understand and want me ta play, but I can’t because of that Brennan. He’s a monster and needs ta be locked up, so that others can’t go through what we did. I want justice.”

Tears pricked at Leo’s eyes, as he watched his mate talk. He’s so brave, Leo thought. And I’m so proud of him. Raphael paused and his and Leo’s eyes met. Leo smiled at him and mouthed, “You’re doing great, Raphie.”  
Raphael smiled weakly and said, “Brennan told me he killed thirty-two people and I saw a girl killed in front of my own eyes. She wasn’t much older than me. Maybe seventeen. She had hopes and dreams and they were all gone in an instant. That’s how fast it was. I wanted ta help, but I couldn’t. All I could do was watch and see the light die in her eyes and hear the bastards laughin'. They got off on it and I can tell ya now that if Brennan ain’t locked up, he will kill again and he’ll go after my family. I can’t protect them, because of my condition, but ya can. Ya can send him ta prison and prevent him from hurtin’ my family and others.” Raphael spoke for a long, long time and ended with, “Please send him ta prison. No. Please give him the death penalty. He don’t deserve a life. He gave others the death penalty and never flinched. He deserves the same thing. I may never walk again thanks ta him, but knowin’ that he'll never be free again and will pay for his sins will bring me some comfort. That’s all I gotta say. Please listen ta me. Please.”

Gonzalez had listened to the testimony with tears in his eyes. He turned off the camera when Raphael was finished and said, "Thank you, Raphael. You were extremely courageous and I’m so sorry for what happened to you.”  
“Will it be enough for the jury?”  
“I hope so.”

Gonzalez’s phone rang. “Yes? He what? I’ll be there now.” He disconnected the call. “Brennan Worthington’s in custody and he’s agreed to talk. I have to go.”  
“Promise me ya won’t tell anyone ‘bout us,” Raphael pleaded. “Please.”  
“I have a boy a year older than you, Raphael, and I’d die if anything happened to him, so I give you my word I won’t. Your testimony should be fine, but here's my number if you need to talk to me again.” Gonzalez handed it to Leo and said, “Blindfold me again if you need to, but I swear I won’t tell anyone about you and your family.”  
“Blindfold him,” Raphael said, not taking any chances. “And take Daniel with ya. He ain’t welcome here.”

“But I could have people after me too,” Daniel protested.  
“Not my problem,” Raphael snapped. “Ya have blood on yer hands. I don’t want ya 'round my family, ya psycho.”

“I’ll arrange witness protection, Mr. Rosenberg,” Gonzalez said. “So you’ll come with me.”  
“Very well,” Daniel said. “I guess it’s goodbye, guys.”

“Hopefully,” Raphael said angrily.

Daniel and Gonzalez left with the video testimony and Raphael said, “Do ya think Gonzalez can really be trusted? He seems ta be on our side, but what if he ain’t?”  
“I’ll follow him, bro,” Mikey said. “You get some rest. Been a long day. Later, bro.”

“I’ll be in my lab if you need me,” Don said and left.

Leo sat down beside Raphael’s bed and said, “You did good, Raphie. I’m so proud of you.”  
“Had ta be done. I just hope it was enough ta send that asshole away.”  
“It will be. You’re my hero, Raph. So brave and I love you,” Leo said and kissed his beak.  
“I love ya most,” Raphael said and smiled. “Ya give me strength, Leo. Ya and the kids. I’d be lost without ya guys.”  
“We will always be with you. Get some sleep.”  
Raphael closed his eyes and thought, it was so damn hard talkin’ ta that cop, but I’m glad I did it. I hope my testimony helps with the case and I really hope Gonzalez don't tell anyone ‘bout us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is Gonzalez a foe or a friend?


	28. Brennan's interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brennan's interrogated at the police station, the District Attorney insists on meeting Raph and Daniel can't face all he's done.

Gonzalez took Daniel to the police station and left him with his superiors to organize witness prosecution. Then he went into the interview room, where Brennan sat at the table, angrily drumming his fingers on it. “About time,” Brennan said crossly, leaning back in his chair and placing his feet onto the table. “I have things to do and you’re keeping me from them.”

“I’m Detective Gonzalez, Mr. Worthington, and you mean more killing?” Gonzalez demanded sarcastically.

“What? No,” Brennan said in shock. ”I’ve never killed anyone.”

“You’ve waived your rights to a lawyer.”

“I don’t need one, because I’m innocent.”

“Does the name Raphael mean anything to you? You tortured him for hours, rendering him a quadriplegic, and nearly ending his life.”

“Raphael? I don’t know anyone by that name. The only Raphael I know is in the Bible, which I read all the time. I’m a good, loyal, law-abiding person, who goes to church each Sunday. Why would I kill anyone? I think you have me confused with someone else.”

“Right. A doppelganger, who goes around killing people. Suuure.”

“I do have a twin brother, you know.”

“Sure you do. I’ve read your family history and you don’t. One brother, whom you molested…”

“Allegedly. There’s zero proof it happened.”

“Your parents wanted your record sealed. Why? Why didn’t they support your brother?”

“He was an attention whore and it never happened, but he was believed, because he manipulated the judge and jury. My parents thought it unfair, having believed me, had my record sealed and it’s going to be expunged soon, leaving me with a clean slate. So you can put that in your pipe and smoke it, Detective. Now, who is this Raphael? I’m curious. I’m so bad at remembering names.”

“Raphael, a mutant turtle.”

“A mutant turtle? Really? Here in New York?” Brennan said and laughed. “I think you’ve been smoking something, Detective. Mutants don’t exist. You should go and see a shrink.”

“There’s nothing wrong with me, Mr. Worthington,” Gonzalez snapped. “And I don’t buy your act. You know exactly who I’m discussing.”

Brennan rubbed his chin thoughtfully and said, “I don’t.”

“Perhaps this video will jog your memory,” Gonzalez said, going over to the TV and popping in the video of Raphael with his face blurred out and turned it on. Raphael’s voice could be heard clearly detailing all that had happened to him.

“Hmm. Fascinating video,” Brennan said. “Thanks, but again…”

“Cut the BS, Mr. Worthington,” Gonzalez said irately. “You know the mutant and tortured him. Just like you did to others, except Raphael survived.”

“Oh,” Brennan said, slapping his forehead in frustration. “That Raphael. Yeah. I know him, but it’s not like what he said. Not at all. Raphael’s lying. Jared and I were out one night when we came across Raphael murdering a young girl. We should have left him for animal control after we got a bit carried away and beat him, but Jared’s temper was out of control and he rendered Raphael a quadriplegic.”

“And your cousin can’t dispute it, because he’s deceased. How convenient.”

Brennan shrugged and said, “That’s what happened, Detective. Raphael’s the killer. Not me. I come from a good family. One of my uncles is a senator, so why would I kill anyone? You know Senator Chad Worthington, don’t you? That’s my beloved uncle and he’ll have your balls if you persist in interrogating an innocent like me. Raphael’s dangerous and so is his family. Bunch of mutants, who go around terrorizing innocent civilians. The police would be wise to round them up and send them somewhere, where they’re locked up, so they can’t wreak more havoc. Can I have a smoke?”

“No. But if Raphael’s innocent, why would he say you’re a murderer?”

“That's easy. He’s pissed, because Jared turned him into a quadriplegic and now that that Jared’s dead, he wants me to pay for his actions. Little unfair, don’t you think? How would you feel if you were blamed for something you didn’t and would never do? I love animals and turtles are my favorite animals. I owned a couple when I was a kid and…”

“I think you’re full of shit.”

“As do I. All you have is a video of a mutant turtle stating that I killed people. That’s hardly sufficient evidence. You need concrete, like fibers and blood and all that, but wait-you have none of that, do you, Detective?” Brennan said and smirked. “And you can’t hold me longer than forty-eight hours, which means I’ll soon walk. I suppose you can use the video, but no one’s going to believe a mutant turtle.”

“You’d be surprised and I will find further evidence linking you to those crimes.”

“Good luck with that. You can’t find evidence that doesn’t exist.”

“I will. I’m sure Mr. Rosenberg will be happy to assist me.”

“Daniel? Hahaha. That’s funny. A mutant turtle and my lover? Well, let me tell you something, Detective,” Brennan said, leaning in conspiratorially. ‘Daniel’s an alcoholic and a drug addict, so anything he says is hardly credible and he’s a pedophile. Oops. Didn’t tell you, did he? I can see he didn’t. I think we’re done here and I’m owed a phone call. I’ll make it now. I think Uncle Chad...”

“The jury will believe Raphael. I do and I’m going to ensure you’re put away, Mr. Worthington, so you can’t hurt more people.”

Brennan smiled and said, “Again, good luck, Detective. Direct me to the nearest phone.”

XXX

While Brennan was on the phone, Gonzalez was talking to his superiors and the District Attorney and showing them Raphael’s video. “This is very moving,” a blonde haired and dark eyed woman said. “But why is his faced fuzzed out, Joaquin?”

“To protect his family,” Gonzalez said. “Raphael and his family are mutants and constantly hunted by scientists and bad people, but you have to believe me, they are good people and wouldn’t hurt anyone. I met them and I have good instincts. You have to allow this video.”

“But what about Rosenberg?” a blond and blue eyed man in a dark suit said. “His testimony can't be used if Worthington was telling the truth about him."

“I don’t know,” Gonzalez admitted. “But going back to Raphael, what possible reason would he have to make up such a story? Do I need to play it again?”

“No,” a brunette woman in a short, navy skirt said. “I think the video should be allowed and I kind of believe Raphael too. I passed Worthington in the hall earlier and he gave off a cold vibe. There’s no doubt in my mind that Worthington committed the murders, but we have to find more evidence. What do you think, Grant?”

The District Attorney, Grant Fisher said, “I’ll allow Raphael’s testimony on one condition. I want to meet the young man and listen to him in person.”

“He’ll never agree to that,” Gonzalez said.

“Joaquin,” Fisher said. “I respect you, but I need to meet him, so I can make up my own mind independent of the video.”

“I’ll see what I can do, but I don’t think he will,” Gonzalez said. “Raphael’s been through so much and the video was extremely taxing on him. He’s had enough and just wants to be left alone.”

“I understand, Joaquin, but give me his phone number and I’ll talk to him.”

“I don’t have his phone number, but they have mine.”

“Swell,” Fisher said sarcastically.

“But Rosenberg knows how to find them and he can lead us to them.”

“Then we’ll head to the safe house now.”

XXX

Ten minutes later, Fisher, Gonzalez and a few other officers arrived at the safe house and went inside. They were all introduced and Daniel said, “I doubt Raphael will talk to you, Mr. Fisher.”

“Well, no harm in trying, Mr. Rosenberg. And I want to ask you a few questions. Is it true you’re a pedophile?”

Daniel’s face paled and he said, “Yes. I’ve been convicted of two offences and spent some time in jail.”

“And you failed to mention this.”

“Yes, because I knew my credibility would be in question.”

“And are you an alcoholic and drug addict.”

“Yes.”

“Did you commit any murders?”

“One, but I didn’t want to…”

“We’ll discuss you later, but first, take me to Raphael.”

“I’ll tell you whatever you want to know, but don’t send me prison. I’m dying and I want…”

“Raphael,” Fisher said coldly.

“All right.”

XXX

Half an hour later, they reached the entrance to the lair and Don sprang out of bed, as the intruder alarms went off. “Shit,” he said. “Not again.”

“What’s going on?” Mikey asked, coming out of his room.

“Intruders again. Tell Leo to stay with Raph and take the kids to Dad’s room. Then meet me at the entrance.”

xxxxx 

Mikey went to the infirmary, where Leo and Raph had woken up. “What’s going on, Mikey?” Leo asked.

“Intruders, Leo. Stay here with Raph. The kids will be with Dad, okay?”

“Who the fuck would come here in the middle of the fuckin’ night?” Raphael demanded.

xxxx 

Mikey left the room, took the kids to Splinter’s room and told them to stay there. Then he joined Don at the entrance.

xxxx 

Gonzalez, Fisher and Daniel entered the lair a few minutes later. The others had stayed above ground. Don and Mikey wielded their weapons menacingly and Don said frostily, “Who the fuck's this, Daniel?”

“District Attorney Grant Fisher. He wants to speak to Raphael.”

“I thought we made it clear that Raph’s done talking.”

“Yes, but he wants to meet Raphael. I told him no, but…”

“Wait here, Mikey,” Don said. “I’ll be back.”

“You try anything and you’ll feel my wrath,” Mikey warned, twirling his nunchucks and snarling.

XXX

Don went into the infirmary and said, “It’s Daniel and the District Attorney, Leo and Raph.”

“Grant Fisher?” Leo asked in surprise. “Why’s he here, Don?”

“Wants to talk to Raph. Raph, you don’t have to do this. Your video testimony should have been enough.”

“I got a lotta respect for Fisher,” Raphael said. “He’s handled a lotta high profile cases and has always done an outstandin’ job. I know it'll go well if he's in charge of this case. I'm willin' ta talk, but I don’t want him comin’ back down here and he’s gotta promise he won’t tell anyone where we stay.”

“I’ll tell him,” Don said.

<>xxxxx

Don went back to the others and told them what Raphael had said. “I agree,” Fisher said. “Now take me to Raphael.”

XXX

After being introduced to Leo and Raphael, Fisher stood in the infirmary and said, “Thank you for agreeing to meet me, Raphael.”

“Yer welcome. I don’t understand why ya had ta, though. Wasn’t my video testimony enough, Mr. Fisher?”

“It was extremely moving, but I wanted to meet you, so I could judge for myself whether your testimony was credible.”

“And?”

“I get a feeling everything you said was honest and sincere. I don’t see you as a killer.”

“I ain’t, but Brennan Worthington is.”

“I believe you, Raphael. I briefly met him and I swear I stared evil in the face. I have a favor to ask and I realize it’s a lot, but I can assure you that you’ll be protected.”

“What?”

“Raphael, I’d like you to come to the court house and give your testimony there.”

“No!” Leo yelled, placing a hand on Raphael's shoulder. “No, no. He’s been through enough, Mr. Fisher, and there'll be humans, who hate us and he could be-we could all be killed. He’s not doing it.”

“It’s Raphael’s decision. No offence, Mr. Hamato. Raphael, will you?”

Raphael swallowed hard and said, “Leo’s right. There'll be humans and they hate us. I can’t.”

“I’ll have the army and whatever you need, but I need your presence,” Fisher said. “Please, Raphael.”

Raphael thought for a minute and said, “If I do it, I want complete protection for me and my family and I want privacy durin’ the trial and afterwards. Don’t want anyone comin’ down ta the sewers ta look for us.”

“No one will. Raphael, the victims are counting on you and so are their families.”

Raphael swallowed thickly and said, “I’ll do it, but ya gotta sign an agreement agreein’ ta my terms. Donnie will draw it up and email ya.”

“You’re so brave, Raphael. Thank you.”

“I respect ya and yer reputation, Mr. Fisher. That and that I wanna help the victims’ families get closure is why I’m doin’ it. And I don’t want no recompense for it either. Can ya send that Brennan a message?”

“Thank you, Raphael. And yes.”

“Tell him that I’m gonna walk again and that if he’s out on the streets, what he did ta me is a fraction of what I’m gonna do ta him, so he’d better pray he goes ta prison.”

“It’ll be my pleasure,” Fisher said with a smile. “I’ll be in touch, Mr. Hamato,” he added, looking at Leo.

“Leo, seeing as Raphael trusts you and he doesn’t easily trust humans. You can understand why after all they’ve done to us.”

“Yes. I’m sorry about that. I truly am and I’m honored that you trust me. I won’t let you down and I’ll do my utmost to ensure Worthington does time.”

After giving his e-mail address to Don, Fisher, Gonzalez and Daniel left and headed to the police station.

 

XXX

Daniel sat inside the interview room in the police station, being grilled by Gonzalez, who interrogated him about his involvement in the murders and his past. After barely ten minutes of questioning, Daniel broke down and said, “It’s all true, Detective Gonzalez. I’m an alcoholic, a drug addict, a pedophile and a murderer. I murdered one person with Brennan and his cousin. Just send me to prison.”

“Your testimony isn't credible then and you'll do time for your involvement in Helena Bollings' murder.”

“I understand. So Brennan will walk free.”

“He won't if Raphael still goes ahead with the testimony. If he doesn't, Worthington could walk. I'll take you to your cell. You’ll be arraigned in the morning.”

XXX

Left alone in his holding cell, Daniel sobbed uncontrollably at the thought of spending his days in prison. He knew the pecking system in the prison and pedophiles were regarded as the lowest of the low. The prisoners had their own justice system and what had happened a few years back would happen again to him. Daniel shuddered at the thought and thought, I can’t go through that. A worn-out Gonzalez had been sloppy and hadn’t removed Daniel’s belt before taking him to the holding cell. Daniel removed it, tied one half to the ceiling, the other around his neck, climbed onto a chair and stepped off of it, his eyes bugging out, as he was slowly suffocated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did Daniel die?


	29. Delta

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Delta Breau and her cousin, Liz, head to New York determined to see Brennan pay for his crimes.

Eighteen-year-old athletic, blonde, spikey haired and green eyed Delta Breau, who hailed from Louisiana, nearly dropped her glass in shock, as she studied the TV screen above the bar and the words flashing across it, “Suspected serial killer, Brennan Worthington, has been arrested and is in police custody

“Liz,” Delta said, turning to her twenty-two-year-old black haired and blue eyed cousin, who’d just returned from the bathroom. “Brennan Worthington’s finally been arrested. Look. Now there’ll be justice for Yancey. The cops never believed me when I said I saw Brennan kill him. Me only being five at the time and there was no concrete evidence to arrest him, so he walked. Look. This is fantastic news. We have to go to New York. I want to attend his trial and see him put away. I’m the only one left of my immediate family and I need to do it. For my parents and for Yancey,” Delta added, her green eyes flashing and her mouth set in a firm line.

“Of course,” Liz, a nurse, said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “We’ll go home and pack. And don’t worry. I’ll be there with you every step of the way. That monster’s finally getting what he deserves.”

“No. What he deserves is the death penalty. He took everything from me. Mom was never the same after Yancey’s death and wallowed in alcohol and prescription drugs until she committed suicide. Dad drank himself to death and died when I was twelve. I'd have been foster care if your mom hadn't taken me in”

“What about your job?”

Delta snorted contemptibly, “That dead end job as a librarian isn’t for me, Liz. I want something better and anyway, I have enough in my savings to tide me over for a while until I decide what I want to do.” She touched the tattoo on her shoulder of a Fleur de Lis, in which her brother’s fingerprint was hidden as a memorial, and said, “Let’s go. It’s a long drive.”

XXX

Back at the apartment they shared, the girls quickly packed and Delta dressed in her blue cut-off jeans, pink T and matching pink converse tennis shoes. She was more of a tomboy than Liz, who chose a blue summer dress and white sandals. Delta didn’t wear makeup either and despised the stuff, while Liz enjoyed being a girl and loved looking her best, always wearing makeup wherever she went, even if it was just to the store.

Packed, the girls hopped into Delta’s truck and headed for New York. I want to watch him fry if he’s given the death penalty, Delta thought. I want him to suffer and beg for his life. Nothing will bring my family back, but that’ll give me some peace and closure.

As Delta drove, she thought back to the night when her life had been irrevocably changed.

FLASHBACK: THIRTEEN YEARS EARLIER

Six-year-old friends, Brennan Worthington and six-year-old Yancey Breau, were playing cops and robbers in the garden, while Yancey’s five-year-old sister Delta played with her action figures. “Ever seen a dead person up close?” Brennan said. “It’s so neat. Want to see it, Yancey?”

“Yeah!”

“Old man Thomas died. I usually play in his garden and no one knows he’s dead yet, because his family don’t visit. Want to go see?”

“You bet! Delta, you coming?”

“Sure,” Delta said, leaving her toys and standing up. “But Mom said we should never leave the house alone.”

“It’s only for two minutes,” Brennan piped up. “Or are you a fraidy cat, Delta?”

“Am not,” the little girl said and pouted. “I want to see too.”

XXX

At old man Thomas’s place, the friends went inside, their jaws dropping in amazement, as they studied the old man, who lay on the couch, his face a death mask, a slight grimace upon it and his eyes open, staring vacantly around him. “Isn’t it cool?” Brennan said excitedly, clapping his hands. “A real dead person.”

“It’s creepy,” Delta said and shivered.

“Baby!” Brennan said. “Go home then.”

“Yeah, it’s cool,” Yancey said. “But we should go home now. Mom will be wondering where we are.”

“All right. Are you scared, Yancey?”

“Not at all,” Yancey lied. In truth, he was and wanted to go home, but he didn’t want to appear a wuss in front of Brennan.

“Then let’s go upstairs and look around. Maybe he has some money. Come on.”

“I’ll wait downstairs,” Delta said, moving towards the front door and away from the old man.

XXX

Upstairs, Brennan and Yancey rifled through drawers and finding some cash, Brennan said, “It’s mine.”

“But we should share,” Yancey said. “That’s what friends do.”

“No. It’s mine! All mine!” Brennan screamed, his face darkening in fury and his eyes blazing. He grabbed the paperweight off of the desk and smashed it over his friend’s head in a fit of rage. Stunned, Yancey collapsed to the ground in a heap, blood oozing from the wound and staining the once pristine white carpet scarlet.

Hearing raised voices, Delta rushed to the top of the stairs, peeped through the open door and saw Brennan attacking her brother. Fear creeping into her heart, Delta went downstairs and ran for her life.

xxxx 

Once home, Delta told her mom what had happened and they went to the police, but Delta’s story was disbelieved. She was a bit of a storyteller and told fibs, so no one believed her. They believed Brennan, who didn’t make up stories. He said he’d been in another room and had heard yelling. Afraid, he’d hidden in a closet and when he deemed it safe, he’d come to look and had found his friend dead. There was no blood spatter on Brennan and he was deemed not a suspect and shortly afterwards, his family moved away. Delta didn’t know where, but she’d vowed that she would someday find him and would make him pay for her brother’s death. She knew he was a murderer and she wouldn’t rest until the world knew it too.

XXX

Meanwhile, back at the holding cell, Jim, one of the warders, was doing a routine check on the prisoners, when he saw Daniel’s hanging body, his eyes vacant and his jaw slack. He quickly radioed for help, unlocked the cell and went inside, cutting down the noose and checking for a pulse. Finding none, he immediately began CPR. Help arrived and they took over, but there was no change in Daniel’s condition and he was declared deceased.

“How the hell did this happen, Jim?” the warden Chuck Mantooth, asked. “How did Rosenberg smuggle a belt into his cell and strangle himself?”

“I don’t know. I just came on duty.”

“Someone has to know!” Mantooth barked. “I want answers and I want them now. Do you hear me? And don’t let the press get wind of this. Last thing I need is another scandal after my department was accused of corruption! I want a detailed report of everyone, who had access to the prisoner. Now, Jim!”

“Yes, boss,” Jim said and left the room.

xxxxx 

Mantooth instructed one of his men, a guy named Brian, to take Daniel down to the morgue, where a toe tag was quickly applied and he was placed onto a stretcher, his body beginning rigor mortis.

“Another one?” the ME, Paula Lake said sadly, gazing at Daniel. “He looks so young.”

“Eighteen or nineteen,” Brian said. “Most of them are in this place. It’s kind of depressing. Kid’s about the same age as my boy. My boy would have suffered the same fate but for the grace of God. He's at university instead.”

“Tragic,” Paula agreed. “I’ve seen so much over the years, but it still gets to me. My heart aches for them and their families and what could have been. It never gets any easier telling the families. Those of them, who have families. The mothers crying and the fathers ranting in anger and grief. I sometimes think I should quit and retire up country. It would be less emotionally draining. I know these prisoners have committed crimes, but they’re still human. They're still people with families. This guy will be buried in a pauper's grave if he isn't claimed in a few days. How terrible is that?”

“You’re a softy,” Brian said with a smile. “I feel bad that they could have had different lives and gone down other paths, but I’m not sorry they’re dead. Less evil in the world and my heart’s with the victims and their families. They’re the real innocents. I have to check and see if he has a next of kin, so see you later.”

Paula sighed, stripped Daniel and gently began to clean him with a sponge. Then she turned around to get another cloth, not aware that brown eyes had opened, were gazing around the room and she was no longer fully alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thanks to you all for your feedback and kudos. :)
> 
> Mikey's going to adore Delta the most. About time Mikey has a girlfriend. And will Don like Liz?


	30. Cell mates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brennan makes a new pal.

Brennan was on the phone to his uncle. “Honest, Unc. I never killed anyone,” he said. “It’s a bunch of baloney. When can you bail me out?”

Chad Worthington gritted his teeth and said, “Brennan, there’s nothing I can do this time. My hands are tied. Think how it’ll look if I bail you out. My career. I’ve worked my butt off to get where I am and it’s not going down the crapper because of you.”

“Is that all you care about, Unc? Your career?” Brennan snapped.

“Of course not. I love you, Brennan, but you have to take some responsibility for your actions sometime.”

“But I did nothing and they have no evidence. Lean hard on the DA, Unc. Promise him a promotion to chief of your household or something. Anything. I can’t do time.”

“You have nothing to worry about if you're so innocent and there's no concrete evidence. I have to go.”

“So you won’t help me?”

“No.”

“You’ll be sorry, Unc!” Brennan shouted, his face darkening in rage.

xxxxx 

Chad Worthington made a call to his old pal, Gary Glover, who worked at the NYPD. They’d been high school friends and still kept in touch. “Gary,” he said. “I have a couple of questions. It’s about my nephew.”

“Chad, you know I can’t discuss the case.”

“Please make an exception just this once. Have they got a concrete case against my nephew?”

“DA believes so,” Glover said and lowered his voice. “Fisher has a tape recording of a guy named Raphael, who was tortured by your nephew and rendered a quadriplegic. Raphael says that Brennan and his cousin, Jared, boasted about murdering over thirty people and Raphael saw a girl being killed in front of him.”

“Have you watched the tape?”

“Saw it about five minutes ago. Made me sick to my stomach. This Raphael’s just a kid, Chad. Fifteen-years-old and has three kids. His face was fuzzed out, because of his age and because he’s terrified of Brennan. DA believes the recording will be golden with the jury and Brennan will get the needle.”

“What’s your gut feeling, Gary?”

“Brennan’s guilty. I’m sorry, Chad.”

Chad sucked in a deep breath and said, “He wanted my help. I told him to forget it. I don’t want any part of this thing. I helped him years ago when he was….I believed him. Do you think he was guilty back then? I'm a moron to have been manipulated by him if so.”

“Pointless blaming yourself, Chad. It’s the past. All we can do now is focus on the present and Brennan will get what he deserves if he's guilty. Sociopaths are born manipulators and there was always something off about Brennan, even as a kid. I mean, look at the Yancey's death. That was a tad suspicious.”

“Brennan was just a kid then. You can’t possibly think he was responsible?”

“It wouldn’t surprise me. I’ve seen his cruel side. Saw him tying fireworks to a dog’s tail and setting it off. The poor dog howled agony and Brennan was laughing.”

“You never told me.”

“You adored your nephew, Chad, and thought he was the greatest. You wouldn’t have believed me. No one likes knowing that people they love aren’t what they project. Killing animals is often the precursor to killing humans. Getting a taste for the kill, the blood, seeing the anguish and the light die out in the victims’ eyes and child killers aren’t that rare either. There have been several. Most notably Jesse Pomeroy. Have you read about him?”

“Can’t say I have.”

“Spent the majority of his life in prison. Killed from an early age and was never remorseful up until his dying day.”

Chad shuddered and said, “What makes people become killers, Gary?”

“I honestly don’t know. Some say it’s genetic disposition, others due to maltreatment and child abuse and trauma of some kind, but Brennan never had any of these and neither did his brother, so it’s a mystery why he is the way he is. How is Jack by the way?”

"Don’t know. Kid’s on the road with his band. Rest assured I’m not pulling any strings for Brennan. Is it possible you can get me a copy of the recording?”

“I’ve already said more than I should have, Chad. Can’t do. Sorry.”

“I understand. Later, pal, and thanks.”

Chad poured himself a double whiskey from the decanter and thought, I got it so wrong. Brennan must have hurt Jack and I…How could I have believed Brennan when it was so obvious he molested Jack? It’s my fault Jack is the way he is. A druggie and alcoholic. I must make it right somehow and talk to him.

 

XXX

After Brennan’s call, the villain was led to his holding cell, where he spotted a biker type doing press ups. The biker saw him too and stood up. “Yo,” he said, extending a hand. “I’m Tadhg.”

Brennan shook it and said, “Brennan. What are you booked for?”

“Murder and you?”

“Same, but I’m innocent.”

Tadgh laughed and said, “Me too. They got any solid evidence on you?”

“Just a video testimony of my last victim.”

“Oh. That’s pretty solid.”

“Really? Well, it’s of a mutant turtle. Mutant turtle. Who’d believe a mutant turtle anyway? For one, they don’t exist and two, I never touched him. Fucking thing is lying. It was murdering someone else and I stopped him. Well, my cousin did and went too far and rendered him quadriplegic, but me? I’m an innocent and have never hurt anyone! Fucking animal. I’d like to choke the thing and watch it slowly die for making up such shit! And I’d like to kill my uncle. I’m innocent and he won’t help me. He values his career more,” Brennan said and spat, his glob landing on the floor.

Tadgh’s eyes widened. “Mutant turtle?”

“Yeah. Preposterous, isn’t it?”

“Not really. I’ve seen….Did it have a name?”

“Raphael.”

“Let me guess. His mate’s name is Leo?”

“Whoa. How’d you know that?” Brennan said in surprise.

“Because I’m married to Raphael and the bastard said I killed some people and I was sent here. I never harmed a soul! So we have a common enemy.”

“Sounds like we do,” Brennan said, clapping his hands gleefully. “Isn’t life funny, Tadgh? We were meant to meet, so we could exact revenge on that freak.”

Tadgh nodded and said, “You help me with Raphael and I’ll help you deal with your uncle. I have access to…some powerful equipment and I have a perfect location, where their bodies can be disposed of. And if Raphael’s a quad, he’ll be a sitting duck.”

“Of course, we’ll have to eradicate his entire family, including his kids, so there are no witnesses. Does the powerful equipment include an electric chainsaw?”

“Of course and yes.”

“Fabulous. Chefs love slicing and dicing and I do too. That is of limbs. It’s going to be so much fun. You aren’t squeamish, are you?”

“Nope.”

“Excellent.”

“Do you know where Raphael stays?”

“Yes. Been there several times when I was romancing his mate after they had a fall out. But, first, we’ll need to think of a way of breaking out of here,” Brennan said, pointing at the walls.

Tadgh lowered his voice and said, “I’ll think of something, buddy. We’ll soon be out.”

Brennan grinned and said, “It’ll be so much fun listening to the cracking sound of their bones, as they break. I love a good murder. If things go our way, will you join me and be my partner?”

“I’d be honored.”

“Awesome. We’ll be the most fearsome team on the East Coast. No. In the whole of the States. Nothing will stop us.”

You’ll soon be no more, Raphael, Brennan thought and smiled. I'll enjoy destroying you. Maybe I’ll keep your corpse for a while. No. I’ll take your shell and keep it as a souvenir and the limbs and other body parts will be terrific in stews. Yummy. I'll roast your head, I think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Long overdue, sorry. Been stuck. Had a birthday and life getting in the way. Will try and be more consistent.
> 
> Thank you for all your reviews and feedback :)


	31. Knocked down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel's hit by a car and Leo and Raphael chat. Lots of fluff between the mates. Aw. They're so sweet together.

Paula turned around to get something, but Daniel had his his arms tightly wrapped around her throat and began to squeeze before she could scream. She fought futilely-he was too strong-and it wasn’t long before her eyes bugged out, her lips turned blue and she was no more. Daniel released her, checked her pulse and satisfied that she was dead, he undressed her and stuffed her in a closet. He donned her lab coat and thought, I have to get out of here before anyone notices that she’s missing. He quickly left the room and headed for the exit, praying that no one recognized him.

He was lucky and managed to get out of the hospital unnoticed. Where to now, he thought? The turtles won’t help me and I can’t go home. An idea came to him and he thought, that’s my only hope. She’d never turn me away. He walked as fast, as he could and thought, all I want is to spend my final moments in peace. Don't I deserve that after the crappy life I've had?

Daniel crossed the street, but his mind focussed on other things, he wasn’t looking where he was going. There was a screeching of tyres and a car hit him dead on, sending him flying into the air and lying in a crumpled heap, his eyes closed. The car had killed him on impact, shattering multiple bones, and he was a bloody mess.

A woman jumped out of the car, rushed to him, and seeing that he had no pulse, said frantically, as she wrung her hands, “Delta, we killed him. Oh, my gosh. What the hell are we going to do?”

“We pulled on the breaks, Liz. It’s not our fault. He wasn’t looking where he was going.”

“Yeah, but the cops won’t buy that. What the hell are you doing, Delta?” Liz demanded, seeing her cousin yank out her cell phone from her bag.

“Calling the cops.”

“But they’ll send us to jail,” Liz wailed. “No one else saw the accident. Let’s just get into our car and drive away, okay? No one will know.”

“We will, Liz, and not reporting an accident's a crime.”

“But we’ll go to jail. I’m too pretty and young to spend my life in prison!”

“It won’t come to that. They’ll conduct an investigation, see that it wasn’t our fault and everything will be fine.” Delta dialled a number and stated what had happened. Then she said, “They’ll be here shortly.”

Liz turned her back on her cousin and thought furiously, just what we need. Fucking jerk should have looked where he was going. Now, we’ll go to jail and we can’t get justice for Yancey!

Gonzalez arrived a few minutes later and approached them. “Miss Breau?” he said.

“That’s me,” Delta said. “My cousin and I were driving, when he appeared out of nowhere. I pulled on the brakes, but it was too late.”

“Were you drinking?” Gonzalez asked.

“Nope,” Liz said. “Like she said, it’s his fault, Officer. We’re innocents, so we’re not going to go to jail, are we?”

Gonzalez studied Daniel’s prone body, stepped closer, and recognizing him, said, “I need to make a call. Stay here.”

“We’re done for, aren’t we?” Liz said in dismay. “I told you to say nothing, Delta!”

Gonzalez walked a few feet away, dialled a number and said, “It’s Daniel Rosenberg. Yes, the one, who should have been in the morgue. What the fuck happened? I just found him dead in the street. He was knocked down by a car. Get your butts down here fast and bring an ambulance.” Gonzalez ended the call and returned to the girls. “I need formal statements from you two down at the station.”

“But we’re not going to be charged, are we?” Liz asked.

Gonzalez said, “Statements back at the station and there'll be an investigation of course, during which we’ll decide if you’ll be charged or not. You'll wait here until my men are here. Then they'll drive you to the station.”

Liz hung her head and fretted that they’d be jailed, while Delta thought, I’m sorry about this guy, but it had better not stop us from getting justice for my brother.”

XXXX

The girls sat in the interview room an hour later, writing down their statements. They’d also undergone breathalyzer tests and no alcohol had been found in their systems. Daniel’s body had been carted away in an ambulance destined for the morgue. When they were done, they handed their statements to Gonzalez, who said, “Now you wait here. I have forty-eight hours to decide whether to charge you or not.”

“Right,” Delta said. “Is it possible to get some coffee, please, and maybe something to eat?”

Gonzalez nodded and left the room.

“We’re screwed,” Liz sobbed. “I told you…”

“I know, Liz,” Delta said. “But driving away and leaving him would have been wrong. We did the right thing.”

“Keep telling yourself that when you’re locked in a cell with Bertha,” Liz snapped.

“Bertha?”

“Yes. The obese woman, who makes you her slave! I want to throw up. Damn it. This is a fine mess you’ve gotten us into, Delta!”

Delta chose to say nothing and thought, surely the cops will see it wasn’t our fault. They have to. The evidence shows it.

XXX

Raphael whined in his sleep, and Leo, who’d fallen into a light slumber, his head on the stretcher, was instantly awake. “Raph,” he said, grabbing his mate’s hand. “Raph. I’m here. You’re dreaming and are safe. Raph.”

Golden eyes opened and Raphael said, tears running down his cheeks, “I’m safe? Really? Ya and the kids too?”

“Yes, my love,” Leo said and kissed his beak. “We all are.”

“Good. Then, it was just a bad dream,” Raphael thought and heaved a sigh of relief.

“Want to talk about it?”

“Chainsaws, blood, gore. So much, Leo,” Raphael said, his lower lip quivering. “Our babies vivisected, their entrails hanging out of their bellies, their jaws slack. Dead. They were murdered first and then Sensei, Donnie, Mikey and ya. Makin’ me watch it all, knowin’ I was powerless ta do anythin’. Then, after torturin’ me, they killed me and they used our organs in stews and hung our shells on their walls. It was….”

“Just a bad dream, my sweetheart,” Leo said and kissed the knuckles on Raphael’s hand. “Nothing is going to happen, Raphie. Brennan’s in prison and the jury will find him guilty. He’ll be sentenced to death and will never walk the streets again. We’re safe.”

“Ya know that Tadgh? We had a ceremony and he’s in jail now, but what if he gets out? He’s gonna be hell bent on findin’ me. And God forbid, he and Brennan ever hook up. The destruction they’d leave in their wake would be… It’s too fuckin’ scary ta think ‘bout. Brennan knows where we stay and they’d immediately come here.”

“Tadgh’s evil too, my love, and won’t be getting out, but I'll have Donnie check our security and upgrade it if you're that worried, okay? But honestly, my takara. They’re locked up and will never get out. You’re safe and so is our family,” Leo said and kissed his beak again.

“I hope yer right, Leo.”

“I am, my sweetheart. Now rest and know I’m with you and the babies are sleeping with Dad.”

An acid smell suddenly permeated the room and Raphael turned his head away in embarrassment, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I’m sorry,” he said.

“You have nothing to be sorry about, my takara,” Leo said, pulling back the covers and removing Raphael’s sodden diaper. “It’s all right. You’d do the same for me.” He got a couple of wet wipes, wiped Raphael and when he was satisfied he was clean, he got a fresh diaper and diapered his brother. “All done,” he said. “Look at me, sweetheart.”

“Thanks, but I don’t wanna. I’m mortified at havin' ya feedin' and changin' me, like I'm a baby, Leo. I guess I am. I'm a fuckin’ useless piece of shit and not the protector I was. I'll understand if ya don't wanna be my mate no more, because there's a chance I could be this way forever and ya don’t need a burden like me. Ya already have the kids and…”

Leo cut off his sentence by turning Raphael’s head and saying firmly, “Stop that shit, Raphie. I love you and nothing will change. Not this. Nothing. We’ll get through this together and you might walk again. Don’t give up, my love. You’ve never been a quitter.”

“No, but this is…I just don’t want ya ta think I’m a burden.”

“You aren’t. You’re my soulmate, my love and my babies' daddy. And this? It's tough, but our love's rock solid, Raph. We’ve endured a lot and our bond's never been broken. Not permanently. How can it when we’re two sides of the same coin? Our love will get us through this. I promise and we’ll even stronger than before. I'll be your strength if you sometimes feel weak. Just like you’ve always been mine, so stop talking crap and accept you have me for life.”

Raphael smiled and said, “I love ya too, Leo. So much. How'd I get so lucky ta have ya for my mate? And how could I throw us away?”

“That’s the past, Raphie, and we both got lucky,” Leo said and captured Raphael’s mouth in a gentle kiss. When they broke apart, Leo said, “Rest, my treasure, okay? Think you can now.”

Raphael nodded and said, “Maybe, but don’t leave me.”

“Never,” Leo said and grabbed his hand. He watched, as Raphael closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. Yes, Leo thought. We'll survive this, like we have everything else. Nothing or anyone can sever our bond and love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thanks for the support. Much appreciated. :)


	32. The cold, hard facts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Raphael learn more about Raphael's condition and the challenges facing them. And Raphael asks for Mikey's assistance.

Raphael woke up early the next morning, August 3, and saw Leo with his head slumped on the stretcher, one hand resting on Raphael’s plastron. He'd obviously fallen asleep at some point. He ain’t gettin’ much, Raphael thought and he barely eats. All he does is watch over and care for me. That’s Leo to a T. Always there for others, even when he’s bone tired. Leo stirred a few minutes later, and raising his head, saw his mate staring at him. “Morning, Raphie,” he said and kissed him on the lips.

“Mornin’, Fearless. Ya look exhausted. Look at those dark circles under yer eyes. And are those wrinkles?”

“I’m fine,” Leo said and stifled a yawn. He sat up and added, “How are you, my love?”

“Yer not fine. When was the last time ya ate a proper meal or had a good rest? Why don’t ya go get somethin’ ta eat and go take a long nap, okay? One of our brothers will come sit with me.”

“No. I nearly iost you, Raph. I’m not leaving your side, so stop nagging.”

“Obstinate bastard.”

Leo smiled and kissed his hand. “Call me what you want, but I’m staying put.”

Don entered the infirmary and said, “Good morning, guys. Sleep okay?”

“Morning, Don,” Leo said. “For the most part. Is the security upgraded?”

“Going to work on it after breakfast. Just a few things to modify.”

“Please get ta it pronto,” Raphael said. “I’m scared that Brennan will get out and come after us.”

“Will do,” Donnie said. “Now regarding Raph’s condition. It’s not just about changing diapers. The degree of quadriplegia determines what care he needs. I was reading up on it earlier. There’s C-1 to C-3 Tetraplegia with total loss of muscular and respiratory function…”

Raphael cut him off and said, “What am I, Donnie?”

“You fall into the C-4 to C-5 Tetraplegia with impairment, reduced pulmonary capacity and complete dependency. Amazingly, you’re breathing fine on your own, but that could change, so I’ll ask April to see if she can get a ventilator. Raph must sit up when eating and lifted and rolled over when bathed. He must also be lifted and rolled over to eliminate bedsores, because they can become ulcerated if they develop and aren't properly treated. We'll need a wheelchair too, so he can be somewhat mobile. I’ve asked April to look into that. An electric one would probably be best. He'll also need to do respiratory exercises and occupational therapy to try and strengthen his limbs and to prevent muscle wasting.”

Raphael swallowed hard and thought, as tears pricked his eyes, a baby. That’s what I am. A fuckin’ baby reliant on them for everythin’. I fuckin’ hate it. I wish I’d died. This is hell.

“I can do it,” Leo said and squeezed Raphael’s hand.

“Leo, no offence,” Donnie said. “But you can’t do it alone. It’s emotionally draining. May I suggest shifts? I have more nursing experience than you. There’s also the risk of clots. They could occur due to lack of movement and excessive bed rest, so he'll definitely need to be upright and need occupational therapy. I can’t stress enough how important those are. We could ask April to get a special type of support hose that maintains pressure on the legs. Some patients also use blood thinners.”

“Too much fuckin’ work,” Raphael hissed. “I get Leo loves me and he wants ta help, but this…Donnie, how the fuck are we gonna get all I need, even with April’s assistance? And even if we do, the equipment's fuckin’ expensive. We don’t got that kinda cash.”

“Let us worry about that, Raph,” Leo said. “You focus on getting better, my love.”

“Get better?” Raphael scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Leo, ya heard Donnie. I’m totally dependent. How the fuck can I get better?”

“Miracles happen, my takara. Please don’t give up. What are the warning signs of clotting in legs, Don?”

“Swelling, redness, bluish or whitish discoloration of skin, warmth to the touch and pain. Be proactive and examine his extremities daily for signs of a possible clot. I'll help you.”

“Any other risks?”

“Autonomic dysreflexia.”

“What’s that?” Raphael asked,

“Autonomic dysreflexia (AD) is a medical emergency,” Don said. “That must be treated immediately. It usually occurs with injuries at T6 level and above as an over-activity of the autonomic nervous system causing an abrupt and dangerous rise in blood pressure. It's triggered from an irritating, painful or uncomfortable stimuli below the level of injury. The symptoms may include sweating above level of injury, nasal congestion, hypertension (blood pressure significantly above the patient's baseline pressure), slow pulse (less than sixty beats per minute) and a flushed face and clammy skin. Raph, you'll have to learn to recognize the symptoms to start treatment, which will consist of identifying and removing the stimulus causing the discomfort, checking the bladder or catheter for fullness or kinks in the tubing, checking the bowel for impaction and checking the skin for abnormalities, such as bruising, pressure sores, ingrown toe nails, broken bone and extreme hot and cold temps.”

“Can we get medication to help lower his blood pressure during an AD event?” Leo asked.

“We’ll do our best, Leo,” Don said. “Casey and April are looking into it. There’s also the risk of spasticity, hypotension, urinary tract and bladder infections and pneumonia. Oh, and pain. Neuropathic. The body sends a jumbled transmission of sensory signals from below the injury level through the injured cord. It might be felt as a burning stinging, tingling sensation, which may be sporadic or chronic. Treatments include: antidepressants and anti-epileptic drugs, non-steroidal and anti-inflammatory agents and narcotic painkillers. Pain can also cause AD. And to minimize urinary and bladder infections, the best way is maintaining a proper bladder management routine, drinking the proper amount of liquids and using sterile equipment. Treatment for a UTI is usually oral antibiotics. In severe cases with a fever, the infection can affect the kidneys and may require injectable antibiotics.”

“Fuck, Leo,” Raphael said in dismay. “This ain’t what ya signed up for, baby.”

“My love, I'll always be here and I can cope. We'll get through this,” Leo said and kissed his beak. “Is that it, Don?”

“No. We need to discuss bowel management. If the injury's above T12, there's resultant spastic bowel. The ability to sense a full rectum may also be lost. Flaccid bowel is common below T12 injuries and results in an inability to have a bowel movement. Flaccid bowel means that there's damage to the defecation reflex that causes the anal sphincter to relax. The best way of preventing bowel issues is following a schedule, since bowel issues can lead to other issues, such as AD. Bowel movements usually requite thirty to sixty minutes at least every other day. The different options are…”

Raphael’s cheeks flamed, as Donnie rambled on about laxatives, digital stimulation and a bunch of other things. I’ll never be able ta piss by myself again or take a crap, he thought despondently. Dependent. For life. Bad enough Leo changin’ me, but Donnie goin’ on ‘bout my bowels is….

“Are You listening, Raph?” Don asked.

“Heard every fuckin’ word,” Raphael said crossly. “Ya’ve really done yer fuckin’ research, haven’t ya, brainiac? And ya sound like a fuckin’ medical dictionary. So detached and clinical. Ya remind me of those oncology doctors tellin’ their patients the bad news. No feelings. Nothin’. Just facts.”

“Hey, hey. Don’t take this out on me, Raph,” Don yelled, his hazel eyes flashing. “You think I like seeing my strong brother confined to a bed and needing someone to wipe his ass? I don’t. You think I haven’t shed tears over this? I fucking have, Raphael. I know I don’t often show my feelings. I’m a scientist and not a damn doctor. I deal with facts and not feelings, but your situation…I feel it too, Raphael,” Don said, placing a hand on his heart, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I feel it and feel powerless. I wish I could cure you, but I can’t, so I’m doing the next best thing. Doing what I do best. Research. The cold, hard facts. We all have to know them, so that we can try and give you the treatment you need to have quality...”

“QUALITY!” Raphael roared, golden eyes blazing. “Ya think this is quality, Donnie? Fuck, ya.”

“No. I was going to say some semblance of a normal…”

“NORMAL! “

“Calm down, Raph,” Leo said. “You’re going to have an apoplexy. Please.”

“Donnie,” Raphael hissed, ignoring Leo, “I’m fifteen and fuckin’ bedridden. This ain’t normal, this ain’t a quality life and I wish I’d died! I don’t wanna be dependent and wear diapers for the rest of my life!”

Leo’s jaw dropped and he said, “You don’t mean that, Raph. You’re just….”

“I know how I feel. Ya ain’t likely ta get all I need and I know what ya said, Leo, but….”

“Not another word! If you’re going to tell me you want us to end your life, I won’t listen. No. You fight this, Raph. For the babies, for us, but most importantly, for yourself. Damn it. You aren’t a quitter, my love. Please don’t give up. I love you. We all do. So damn much. Please,” Leo said, staring at him beseechingly.

Knowing that Leo would never quit bugging him if he didn’t give in, Raphael said, “Fine. I won’t give up. I’m sorry. I’m just overwhelmed and I’m sorry I bit yer head off, Donnie. I know ya were just tryin’ ta help.”

“That’s okay, Raph. I’d be equally distressed.”

“I’m going to grab a quick cup of tea and see the kids, Raph,” Leo said. “Will you be okay for a few minutes? I’ll bring you something to eat.”

“Bring the kids too. I miss them.”

“Will do. I promise you we’ll survive this, Raph,” Leo said and kissed him on the lips.

Raphael was wallowing in self-pity, tears rolling down his cheeks, when the door opened and Mikey said cheerily, “Hey, bro.”

“Mornin’, Mikey.”

“Thought you might like some company,” Mikey said, pulling up a chair beside Raphael’s bed.

“They wanted ya ta come sit with me, didn’t they? I’m glad ya did. Ya know yer my favorite little bro, right?”

“I thought Donnie was.”

“Be real. Ya are, Mikey. Despite the fact yer always prankin’ me, we’re close, right? Always have been yer my best friend next ta Leo. I’m gonna ask ya somethin’ and ya will do it if ya love me."

“What is it, Raph?” Mikey asked nervously, sensing he was about to be asked something important.

“I don’t wanna live like this. I want ya ta kill me. This is hell, Mikey. Please," Raphael begged, tears trickling down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Wow. Two chapters in two days. 
> 
> Will Mikey do as Raph asks?
> 
> Special thanks to BuYou. This chapter is dedicated to you. :)


	33. Raphael's request

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey is faced with a heart wrenching and difficult decision.

Mikey’s jaw dropped, as he gazed at his brother incredulously. “You want me to what, Raph?”

“End my life. Please, Mikey,” Raphael begged, as tears continued to fall down his cheeks and drip onto his pillow. “I can’t live like this. It’s hell. Not bein’ able ta hug and kiss Leo and the babies and bein’ dependent. It ain’t me. I’m countin’ on ya ta help me, bro. Ya gotta.”

“What about Leo and the kids? Have you considered how devastated they’ll be?”

“Leo’s effectively a single parent anyway with me bedridden and he's doin’ a damn fine job. All I am is a fuckin’ burden and I fuckin’ hate it, Mikey. Do ya know what it’s like havin’ someone changin' yer diaper and feedin' ya and all ya do can is just lie there? It’s degradin’, humiliatin’ and the cost of drugs ta keep me alive-well, we don’t got that kinda cash.

“Raph, I can’t. You have babies, who love you and Leo would kill me if I helped you. It’s dishonorable. You call it helping you. Others won’t take that view. Look at the case of Dr Death. Remember him?

“It'd be helpin’ yer bro. I’d do it for ya if ya were in this situation,” Raphael said manipulatively. “In a heartbeat, but I guess ya don’t fuckin’ care ‘bout me. Yeah. I remember that case. Controversial. Some people viewed it as benevolence for helpin' those who were in pain and dependent. Others viewed it as murder. Me? It ain’t murder if someone wants ta die and is beggin' ya, Mikey. Ta die with dignity the way I wanna.”

“That’s unfair, Raph!” Mikey said angrily. “I love you and it’s hard seeing you so helpless.”

“Hard for ya?” Raphael said sarcastically, his golden eyes flashing. “Think how hard It is for me. I can’t even fuckin’ make love ta Leo! I’ve thought ‘bout it and I wanna die. It’s the only way ta free me from this livin’ nightmare!”

“Death's never dignified, Raph.”

“Maybe not, but I’m goin’ out on my own fuckin’ terms. It’s easy. Ya can smother me with a pillow. it'll take less than five minutes. Do it, Mikey. Please. I’ve never asked ya for a damn thing before, but I’m beggin’ ya now and ya know I don’t beg. Help me. I’m dependin’ on ya.”

“And what do I tell the others? The truth? No. I…”

“I thought ya loved me,” Raphael said bitterly, his golden eyes blazing. “But ya don’t. Ya don’t care that I’m sufferin’. I honestly believed ya would help yer big bro, whose always been there for ya. Guess I was wrong.”

His lower lip quivering, Mikey said, “It’s not just a favor, Raph. It’s asking me to help you die. Do you get the gravity of it all? It’s not like asking me to bake you a cake and it’ll have lasting ramifications. Leo will be furious and heartsore, the babies will lose you, me and Donnie will lose a brother and Dad will lose a son. Do you understand what you’re asking me?”

Raphael swallowed hard and said, “Yes. I’ve considered what ya said, but dyin’ is what I want. I can’t live this way, Mikey. I just can’t and it ain’t bein’ selfish. It’s knowin’ my limitations and this is fuckin’ it. I can’t deal with this. Me a fuckin’ useless baby and I do believe I’d be better off dead than sufferin’ anymore. I understand ya all will miss me, but knowin' I won't be sufferin', because ya helped me should count for somethin’, Mikey. Knowin’ ya helped yer bro ta find peace. Ya need ta decide now. Leo’s gonna come back soon and it’ll be yet another hellish day for me. Eternal hell. Would ya want this?”

“No,” Mikey said thickly. “But I wouldn’t want to put pressure on my brothers by requesting this either.”

“I would help ya. Ya know I would. Mikey, please,” Raphael said, staring intently into Mikey’s eyes.

“May God forgive me,” Mikey muttered. Tears streamed down his cheeks, as he weighed the pros and cons of Raphael’s request. “I’ll do it. I could never stand seeing anyone in pain, especially you, Raph, and if that’s what you want…..I’ll rell Leo I went to the bathroom and you were dead when I returned.”

Raphael managed a smile and said, “Thank ya.”

Mikey picked up a pillow next to Raphael, and squeezing his eyes shut, pressed it down onto his brother’s face, hoping the end would be swift.

As Raphael’s face started turning blue, he made choking sounds and Mikey forced himself to continue, as nausea bubbled in his belly. I’m killing my brother, he thought. My big brother. Oh, Raph. How did it come to this?

The door suddenly opened and Leo jr ran inside, followed by Kane. “Daddy!” the kids shrieked, coming to a halt when they heard gasping noises emanating from the bed.

“Out of here now,” Mikey said firmly.

“What are you doing to Daddy?” Leo jr asked, his sapphire eyes narrowed.

“Scat!” Mikey yelled. “He’s fine.”

“Is it a game?” Kane asked. “Can we play?”

“Oh. There you are, kids,” Leo said, suddenly entering the room. “I was looking…” Leo’s sentence trailed off when he saw Mikey standing over Raphael’s bed. Understanding what was happening and feeling sick to his stomach and incensed, Leo rushed to Raphael’s bedside and grabbed Mikey by his arm, dragging him away and looking down at his now unconscious mate.

“Is Daddy okay?” Leo jr asked. “He was making strange sounds.”

“My hell. Raph,” Leo said, tears running down his face. He bent down, began CPR and thought, stay with me, Raph. Don’t go. Don’t leave me. I’m going to fucking kill Mikey!

“Leo,” Mikey began, wringing his hands. “I…”

Leo looked up and snapped, “Take the kids out now. They shouldn’t see this. Now, Mikey!”

“He begged me,” Leo,” Mikey wailed.

“I said now!” Leo said, and returned to the CPR.

Mikey shoved his nephews out of the room and said, “He begged me, Leo. What was I supposed to do?”

“Call me!” Leo hissed, looking up again. “It's on you if he dies Mikey and I'll never forgive you for as long as I live. Get out and go be with the kids, but keep them well away from here. And tell Donnie to come here. Come on, Raph. Wake up. Please, my love.”

xxxx 

Mikey left and thought miserably, Raph wanted to die. He wants this, Leo. Why can’t you give him what he wants? He doesn’t want to be an invalid for the rest of his life and dependent on you. Let him die. I was against it at first, but I understand now. Being dependent, for him especially, is torture and worse than death itself. Trapped in his own body and powerless. That’s not our strong, brave Raph.

xxxxx 

Donnie entered the room and said, “Any progress, Leo?”

“No. I’ll try for a few more minutes. Then you take over,” Leo said, looking up. “I should never have left Mikey with him!”

“You weren’t to know Raph would ask Mikey. It’s not your fault.”

Leo resumed the CPR and sighed in relief a couple of minutes later, when Raphael’s eyes fluttered open. “You stupid prick,” Leo said irately, while inwardly relieved Raphael was back.

“Ya always gotta ruin things,” Raphael said weakly. ‘Don’t ya?”

“If saving your life's ruining things, then by damn, I’m going to do it!” Leo said angrily, his nostrils flaring and his sapphire eyes stony. “Do you know what a fucking huge scare you gave us, Raphael?”

“You’re selfish, Raph,” Don chimed in. “How could you? Didn’t you think about the kids and Leo?”

“Fuck off, Donnie. This ain’t yer business.”

“It is. You may be Leo’s mate, but you’re my brother! And how could you do that to Mikey and put him in such a position?”

“Yes, Raphael!” Leo said, crossing his arms.

“Yer the fuckin’ selfish ones,” Raphael raged. “Ya shoulda let me die, like I wanted, and on my own terms. I don’t wanna live like this, Leo. I told ya, but ya don’t listen ta me. Ya never do!”

“That’s unfair. I always listen to you, but this? I categorically will not listen to this shit. Suicide? Assisted suicide? Are you aware the kids saw what was going on? Our babies. They were asking why Daddy was making strange noises.”

Raphael rolled his eyes and said, “Tell them I was dyin’ and ya stopped it!”

“Want me to leave?”

“No,” Leo said. “You’re back now, Raphael, and you need rest after that stunt you pulled. I’ll stay with you and so will Donnie. We'll take shifts and I won’t be leaving you with Mikey again. I don’t trust him.”

“Blah, blah! Yer not listenin’ ta me, Leo. I don’t wanna live.”

“What about me? What about the babies? Don’t you love us?”

“Ya know I do. That’s low, Leo.”

“No. What’s low is asking Mikey to help you die and leaving us, who love you so much. We’d be absolutely heartsick if you left us, Raph. A void in our lives that’d never be filled. The kids need you and I need you. And I've said this before and I'll say it again. We can get through this.”

“I love ya and the kids with all my heart. Ya know that.”

“No. I don’t. You wouldn't have done this if you did. You’d have continued fighting, like the fighter you’ve always been.”

“Exactly,” Don said. “You’ve always said you weren’t weak, Raph. Well, I think your actions were weak and selfish.”

Ashamed, Raphael’s cheeks reddened and he reluctantly admitted, “Yer both right, but Leo, ya don’t know what it’s like bein’ so reliant.”

Leo took Raphael’s hand in his and said, “We don’t, Raphie, but we do need and love you and we’ll do our best to ensure you get all you need. I honestly thought I’d lost you. Please don’t do this ever again. Please fight.”

“I’m not the courageous warrior I was, Leo. I’m scared. Donnie said this could be permanent and that terrifies me.”

“I understand, Raphie, but you have me, Donnie, our family and friends and we’ll all help you through this. Please. And miracles do happen.”

“Fine. I’ll fight and give my all.”

“I sense a but,” Leo said nervously.

“Ya know me well. Now, Leo, if ya love me so much and if in a year’s time, there ain’t no fuckin’ progress, yer gonna give me what I wanted, okay?”

“Raphael!” Don said, mortified.

“Fuck off, Donnie. I may be fuckin’ useless, but I still got all my faculties intact. Well, Leo, my beloved mate, what’s yer answer?”

“That’s low, Raphael,” Leo said sadly.

“Well, ya’d be honorin’ yer mate's wishes.”

“I’d be robbing my kids of a dad.”

“Well? I can always give up right now again and maybe ask Casey or we have a year ta see what happens. Yer call, Leo.”

Leo sucked in a deep breath and said, “I hate your terms.”

“You’re despicable, Raph,” Don said crossly.

“Well, Leo?” Raphael pressed, ignoring Don.

“Fine. You have a deal, but I expect you to uphold your end.”

“I said I would. Bring me my babies. I wanna see them. It's been so long.”

“How could you agree, Leo?” Don asked.

“We’ll talk later, Don,” Leo said, thinking, maybe Raph will change his mind if he sees the kids. “I’ll bring the babies, Raph, and then you’ll eat and have a rest.”

"I'll be in the lab if you need me." Don said and left, pointedly ignoring Raphael, He was mad at him not only for his actions, but also for the way he was treating Leo.

XXX

Ten minutes later, the kids stood beside Raphael’s bedside. Raphael jr was in Leo’s arms, his golden eyes wide, as he studied the room. “Hey, kids,” Raphael said and smiled.

“Are you okay, Daddy?” Kane asked uncertainly.

“Yeah. Come closer, my boys. Leo, place Raphie on my plastron.”

The kids moved closer and Leo placed Raphael jr on Leo’s plastron. Raphael looked at his kids and beamed. “Ya know I love ya boys so much, right?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Leo jr said. "We love you too."

Raphael jr babbled and stretched out a hand, touching Raphael’s beak. A stray tear ran down Raphael’s cheek and he thought, I so badly wish I could hold them. Can’t do nothin’, apart from lyin' here. Miss huggin’ them so much.

“Kiss your dad,” Leo said.

The older boys did and Raphael grinned. “Ya two been good?”

“When are you going to play, Daddy?” Kane asked.

“When I’m better,” Raphael said.

“When will that be?” Leo jr said.

“I don’t know,” Raphael said. “But I'll try my best ta be better soon. is Uncle Casey playin’ ball with ya?”

“No,” Kane said. “He’s been busy, but Grandpa has. We miss you, Daddy.”

Raphael jr babbled again, touching Raphael’s face and their golden eyes met. The baby cooed and kicked his legs in the air and Raphael couldn’t help smiling again. Seeing his babies made his heart swell with pride and love. Next to being with Leo, they were the best things he’d ever done and he couldn’t imagine his life without them. How could I have thrown them away, he thought? And for what? Cheap sex and trailer trash when I had the best. Leo and my babies. Our family. I’m a dickhead. How could I think 'bout takin’ my life? Maybe they need me after all.

The kids chatted with Raphael for over an hour. Then Leo took them to the kitchen for a snack and to spend time with their grandpa. When the kids were settled with Splinter in the lounge, Leo made lunch for Raphael and returned to the infirmary.

XXX

Leo helped Raphael into a sitting position and said, “I brought you some mac and cheese, Raph.”

“Thanks.”

Leo spooned some pasta into Raphael’s mouth and after he’d swallowed, he said, “Have fun with the kids.”

“Yeah, but yer sneaky.”

“How so?” Leo asked, quirking an eye ridge.

“Ya said I should rest, but ya let me spend time with the kids first. I know why. Ya hoped I'd change my mind if I spent time with them."

“You’re right. Did it work?” Leo asked hopefully,

“Yes. Bein’ with them makes me feel good and I love them so much. Love ya all and it made me feel like a shit for wantin’ ta take my life. They love me and were happy bein’ with me. Maybe they need me after all.”

“You are a shit, but I still love you.”

“Let me finish, Leo. I’m gonna give my all and ain’t never gonna give up. Not ever. I’ll fight. I wanna get better and will do whatever it takes. And if I don’t, I still wanna see my babies grow up and become the wonderful ninjas I know they'll be.”

“Do you mean that, Raphie?”

“Yeah. I give ya my word. Besides, I still gotta testify against Brennan and my death might let him get off, so…Yeah. Yer stuck with me forever, Leo.”

Leo’s face broke out into a wide grin and he planted a kiss on Raphael’s mouth. “You have no idea how happy that makes me, Raph.”

“I think I got an idea,” Raphael teased. “My terms are off, baby. For good. I promise. I love ya and I hope ya will forgive me.”

Leo placed the bowl of pasta on the desk, buried his head in the crook of Raphael’s neck and wept tears of joy. “You’re forgiven, Raphie,” he sobbed. “Just don’t do that again. I couldn’t live without you, my takara, my heart, my soul. Love you with all my heart.”

“Sap, but I couldn’t either, Leo. And I’m gonna be reliant on ya a lot and for yer strength. Ya and the kids give me hope and a reason for livin’ and I won’t let ya down. Not anymore. I swear.”

“Now that’s the warrior I know,” Leo said and looked lovingly into Raphael’s eyes. “We'll get through this, my love.”

One thing I’m now sure of, Raphael thought, is that I’m down, but I won’t be broken anymore and I'll fight as long as I have breath in my body. I will see my babies grow up and I’ll apologize ta Mikey for manipulatin’ him. That was reprehensible. And I’ll be a better mate ta Leo, like he deserves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thanks for the reviews and kudos. I'm so grateful. :)
> 
> I'm so sorry I haven't written much this week, but my net's been down all week. Good to be back. :)
> 
> Assisted suicide is extremely controversial. All I'll say is I can understand the pros and cons for it. Both make strong arguments. Can you imagine being dependent on someone for everything? Especially an independent person like Raph, who also prided himself on his strength?


	34. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A miracle happens, which stuns everyone. Lots of fluff and happiness abounds.

Raphael was dozing later that day and Leo was reading a book, when the door opened and Splinter entered the room, his brown eyes full of concern, as he studied Raphael. “How is he, Leonardo, and how are you?” Splinter asked.

“He’s resting. Gave us all a huge scare earlier. Really thought I’d lost him. Raph’s promised to fight, but it’s going to be a long road ahead. I’m afraid he’ll change his mind. I can’t lose him, Dad. I need him and the kids do too. And I’m mad at Mikey for agreeing to help him.”

“Michelangelo informed me. You have every right to be upset, but bear in mind, Raphael can be very manipulative when he wants to be and Michelangelo only wanted to help his brother. Why don’t you get some rest? You look exhausted. I’ll stay with Raphael.”

“Hey. I’m right here,” Raphael muttered, opening his eyes. “I can hear ya. Stop blamin’ Mikey, Leo. It’s my fault, okay? I asked Mikey and he was just tryin’ ta help me. I pleaded, was manipulative and wore him down until he agreed. Cut him some slack. And I’ve given my word. I ain’t gonna pull a stunt like that ever again, so stop stressin’, my love. Please. And go make peace with Mikey. Hi, Dad, by the way.”

A knock sounded on the door and April, flanked by Casey, entered the room. She was carrying a bunch of yellow roses and Casey held a vase and a paper bag. The aroma of the contents making Raphael salivate. _Wonder what Casey brought._

“Hey, everyone,” April said with a smile. “I hope you don’t mind us popping by.”

“You’re always welcome, Miss O’ Neil,” Splinter said. “Are you and Mr. Jones well?”

“Very. Thank you, Sensei, and how are you?”

“Hey,” Leo said.

“Not bad,” Casey said.

“I’m fine,” Splinter said. “I'll leave you and come back later.”

April placed the flowers in the vase by Raphael’s bedside. “I hope you like them, Raph,” she said.

“Thanks, April. They’re pretty. Case, what’s in the bag? It smells so good. Raisins and cinnamon? Cinnamon buns?"

“Yep. Have you been a good boy today, Raph?” Casey teased. “You can only have treats if you have been.”

“Hand the damn thing over! I’m starvin’.”

“Grumpy as always,” Casey said with a grin, opening the packet.

Leo lifted Raphael into a sitting position, took the buns from Casey, broke them into bits and began to feed Raphael, who with happiness shining in his eyes and a contented expression on his face, devoured them within minutes. “Thank ya, Case. I loved them. Yer the best.”

“You’re welcome, pal.”

Leo saw crumbs on Raphael’s face and after wiping them off with a cloth said, “Been a hellish day actually.” He filled them in on the earlier events and added, “I was so frightened. Thought I’d lost him for good.”

“Raph, how could you do that to your brothers and be so selfish?” April asked. “Don’t you care about them? Shame on you.”

“Look, ya have no idea what it’s like bein’ this way, April. I’m no longer the strong, independent guy I was and it’s humiliatin’ havin’ my family do everythin’ for me. I can’t hug my kids or play with them. I can’t even take a piss by myself! I wear diapers, Leo feeds me, changes me and monitors me all the time. Even a cough could kill me. Imagine how ya’d feel if this was ya. Could ya be so judgemental then? Would ya want a life like this? Would ya really? It puts strain on relationships too and I was thinkin’ ‘bout Leo and my family when I decided ta end things. I’m a burden. Emotionally drainin' them, especially Leo, who’s been amazin’ throughout it all. Then I saw my kids and I couldn’t do it and I couldn't do it ta Leo. I owe it ta my family and myself ta fight this and I owe it ta Brennan’s victims, so I can testify at the trial and help put that shitface behind bars forever. He'd probably have walked free if I'd died. I’m sorry I manipulated Mikey, but I was desperate and afraid.”

“You’re not a burden, Raph,” Leo said and kissed his beak. “Never think that, my takara.”

“You’re right, Raph,” Casey said. “I wouldn’t want to live like this either and would have done the same thing. I understand your reasons.”

April gasped and said, “Really, Case?”

“Yes. You have no right to judge him and you can argue that you’d fight, but you don’t know for sure until you’re actually in the same situation.”

April pursed her lips and said, “I don’t agree with it, so we’ll have to agree to disagree. Anyway, I have some good news, Raph. We got the results of the AIDS test.”

“And?”

“Negative.”

“Thank God,” Raphael said and sighed in relief. “Thank ya. That’s a load offa my mind. I thought I had it. Hear that, Leo? I’m negative. Negative. I’m gonna be okay.”

Leo smiled, kissed him and said, “I know, my love. Wonderful news.”

“Means we can make love when I’m better,” Raphael said, looking at Leo adoringly. “Can’t wait ta show ya how much I love ya. Miss it and bein’ able ta touch ya.”

“Love you more,” Leo said and nuzzled his beak against Raphael’s.

“Aw. How cute,” Casey said. “You two are so adorable and perfect together. Gives us singletons hope we’ll find love too.”

“Whoa. Did I miss somethin’?” Raphael asked, blinking in confusion. “Did ya and April break up?”

“Two weeks ago, but it was amicable. We realized we both want different things and we’re way too young to settle down.”

“You’re not much older than us,” Leo said. “And look at us. We settled down really young and we’re doing great.”

“It’s just...”April said. Glancing at her watch, she added, “I have to go.”

“But you basically just got here, April,” Leo said.

“I know, but I have an important meeting and I have to run. I’ll come by tomorrow. Raph, be strong, okay? I know you can do it. Take care, guys.”

“Bye, April,” everyone said in unison, watching her leave.

“Amicable, really?” Raphael asked skeptically, quirking an eye ridge. “It wasn’t, was it, Case?”

“No,” Casey admitted. “We didn’t fight or anything and agreed to split, but it wasn’t really what I wanted. I just didn’t have the heart to…I couldn’t…April’s been offered a job at an art gallery in Los Angeles and she was so excited. It’s what she’s always wanted. To live in California and work in an art gallery and long distance is tough….I didn’t want to rob her of doing what she loves, you know. That’d lead to contempt and strain in the relationship.”

“So ya suggested breakin' up? Yer such a bonehead, Case! Why didn’t ya suggest goin’ with her?”

“I’m not cut out for mixing in posh circles, Raph. Look at me. I’m basically a punk and a loudmouth.”

“So am I and Leo loves me! April loves ya too.”

“Then why did she so readily agree?”

“Because she was hurt, ya twit, and thought ya didn’t love her. Talk ta her and tell her ya love her. Put yer ego aside and go with her!”

“But it’s too late. She’s probably moved on already and met someone. She’s such a fox. Guys fall over themselves to talk to her.”

“Leo, call April.”

“What?” Casey said in alarm. “Don’t! She’s at the meeting.”

“Got cancelled,” April said, suddenly appearing and making Casey almost jump out of his skin. “Sorry. Looks like you guys are stuck with me for a while.”

“Casey loves ya, April,” Raphael said, ignoring the pained look on Casey’s face. “He doesn’t wanna break up and is just worried ‘bout what yer bosses would think 'bout him.”

“Really, Casey?” April asked.

“Yes. I didn’t feel I’d fit in there and I also didn’t want to ruin your chance of finally doing what you love and getting paid for it.”

“You’re such a goose, Casey! I don’t care what my bosses think about you. I love you for who you are. Always have. Always will.”

“Raph says you didn’t want to break up either and was just hurt.”

“That’s right. You’re my world, Case, and far more important than a job. I changed my mind about it earlier today and was going to tell you later, hoping you’d want to get back together.”

“Course I do,” Casey said and grinned. “But won’t you have regrets?”

“I’m seventeen, Case. There'll be other opportunities, but I’ll only accept them if you’re with me. I couldn’t imagine life without you.”

Casey beamed and kissed her tenderly on the lips. April eagerly returned the kiss and wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him close, while Leo and Raphael cheered.

“They're my favorite couple next ta us,” Raphael said. “I wonder when they’re gonna have babies.”

Casey broke the kiss and said in alarm, his eyes wide, “Not yet. We’re happy playing uncle and aunt right now.”

“So ya say,” Raphael said and smiled mischievously. “But I bet ya will have yer own bundle of joy before the end of near year.”

“I’m on the pill,” April said. “No chance of that. Case, go get Raph’s wheelchair.”

Casey left the room and returned a few minutes later, pushing a red power electric wheelchair. Leo jr was sitting in it and Kane walking along side of it. “I want to sit in it too,” Kane whined. “Get off, Leo.”

“No! You wait. Daddy, look,” he said. “Uncle Casey got this. It's super fun to sit in and has all kind of buttons.”

“I want to press,” Kane said and pressed one, making the chair move.

“What do you think, Raph?” April asked. “It’s called the Trojan delux. it has comfortable cushions and back rest, so you’ll have support and brake pedals…”

“Musta cost a fortune,” Raphael said, staring at the chair. “I can’t accept this.”

“Pal, you can and you will,” Casey said. “You need this, so you aren’t stuck in bed. Just think you’ll be able to zip around the lair instead of being stuck in bed. I think it’s cool, bro.”

Raphael’s eyes misted over and he choked out a sob and said, “Thank ya. I don’t know what ta say. Ya guys rock!”

“Thank you,” Leo said. “This means so much. We can never thank you enough.”

“Try it out, Raph,” April said. “Leo, get off the chair and come and stand here.”

“Okay, Aunty April,” Leo jr said and climbed down. “You’re going to love it, Daddy. It’s fun. Come on.”

Casey moved the chair close to the bed and Leo lifted Raphael into it, watching for any signs of any discomfort, but there were none to his relief. “It’s cool,” Raphael said, gazing at the buttons. “But it’s only temporary, because I’m gonna…” He suddenly felt a strange, tingling sensation in his right leg and left hand. I can feel my leg and hand, he thought excitedly. “Leo, guess what? I can feel my right leg and left hand.”

“Now Donnie said that there'd be phantom feelings. It’s normal when…”

“Leo, I ain’t kiddin’. Look, everyone,” Raphael said happily, slowly moving his left hand, flexing the fingers, and then his right leg and moving his toes, a huge grin upon his face. “Did ya see?”

Everyone watched, their jaws dropped in amazement. Kane said animatedly, “Does that mean you’re going to play with us, Daddy?”

“I hope so,” Raphael said. “Leo, ya know what this means, don’t ya? There’s hope.”

“I don’t mean to rain on your parade, Raph,” April said. “But this could just be momentary and even if you regain the usage of those limbs, you may not regain the others.”

“April, stop bein’ so damn pessimistic. This is hope and yer not gonna take that away from me. Leo, ya were right, my love. Miracles do happen and I’m gonna try even harder ta walk again. Say somethin’. Yer awfully quiet.”

“I’m speechless, my angel,” Leo said and kissed his beak, tears of joy rolling down his cheeks. “I believe there’s hope too, so don’t give up.”

“I never will. This calls for a celebration. Pizza.”

“I’ll make the call,” Casey said. “Come with me, April. Great news, Raph. We'll be bashing Purple Dragons again before long.”

“Come here, boys,” Raphael said, ignoring Casey’s comment. The kids went over to him and he lovingly stroked their faces, as tears of his own streamed down his cheeks. I can touch my babies and Leo and hold hands with Leo again, Raphael thought. There is a God. I’m so happy I could burst. He looked at Leo and said, “See that, Leo? Ain’t no fluke.”

“I believe you, my takara.”

“Physio starts tomorrow mornin’. Gonna work so hard and walk again before the end of the year.”

“Raph, that’s too ambitious.”

“No. It ain’t. It’s my goal and I’m gonna do it, ya will see. I’m gonna get better and be the strong warrior I used ta be. And I’m gonna make love ta ya and play with our kids.”

Don appeared and told the kids that it was bath time. They kissed their daddies and left. Then Don said, "How are you feeling, Raph?”

“Fuckin’ fantastic, Don,” Raphael said, moving his left hand and making Don gasp in surprise. “Ya were wrong ‘bout me never recoverin’. Just goes ta show ya don’t know everythin’, especially not the will. It can accomplish anythin’ and I’ll be walkin’ soon. Just wait and see!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Sorry for the long wait. Hope you like it. :) 
> 
> Thanks for all the kudos and reviews.


	35. Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo and Raph discuss the future. Lots of fluff.

Dinner was eaten in the lounge, everyone talking animatedly, as they tucked into the pizza. Raphael was still in his electric chair, stubbornly trying to hold a piece of pizza, so Leo didn’t have to feed him, but his arm not being strong enough yet, he had to concede defeat for the moment and allowed Leo to feed him. He was still determined that he’d be walking before the year was out. He proudly watched his toddlers eating, the baby curled up in his carrycot in between Raphael’s chair and the sofa where Leo sat. Only Mikey looked forlorn and Raphael knew why. He was still reeling from how close Raphael had been to death and his feud with Leo and he’d been nibbling on the same slice of pizza for over five minutes. “Mikey,” Raphael said. “Ya’ve been eatin’ that slice for over five minutes. Ya okay, bro?”

“I…I guess I’m not hungry,” Mikey said and stood up. “I’ll get something later.”

“BS. Ya need ta eat and the shit needs ta end now.”

“Daddy said a bad word,” Leo jr piped up. “That’s naughty, Daddy!”

“I did. So what, Leo? Ya gonna send me ta the naughty corner?” Raphael said,  but more in amusement than anger. Leo jr often called him out on his behavior, just like his mate did. It could be annoying at times, but Raphael mostly found it hilarious. He’d joke and call Leo jr Splinter junior junior.

“Maybe,” Leo jr teased, his lips curving up into a smile. “Or you need a spanking.”

The others stifled giggles at Raphael getting a dressing down from his own kid.

“Leave Daddy alone!” Kane said fiercely, rushing to Raphael’s side and clutching his hand with his grubby hands.

Raphael burst out laughing and said, “Leo’s playin’, sweetheart. Don’t worry, but the fact remains. The tension's gotta end, Leo and Mikey. Yer brothers and ya need ta talk and sort things out. I was in the wrong ta ask Mikey and he was only tryin’ ta be a good bro and ta help me out. I manipulated him. Ya know I can be real persuasive when I wanna be and he’s a softy. He hates seein’ anyone sufferin’, especially us. Leo, please forgive him and mend things. We’re a family and need one another.” Leo opened his mouth to protest, but Raphael cut him off and said, “Blame me if ya wanna, Leo, but not Mikey. Hit me, punch me, do whatever, but forgive our brother and make peace with him. He needs ya. Yer his big bro too and he loves ya so much and I know ya love him, so….?” Raphael said, looking at Leo hopefully.

Leo sighed, looked at Mikey and said, “I’ll try, Mikey. I know Raph can be persuasive, but... I’ll try.”

“Now hug,” Raphael said.

Tears filling his eyes, Mikey hugged Leo and said, “I’m sorry, bro. I just wanted to help Raph. I didn’t mean….”

“I know,” Leo said, tears shining in his own eyes. “But come to me first next time if Raph asks you crap like that, okay?”

“Daddy said a bad word too,” Leo jr chimed in. “Didn’t he, Daddy? Does he need a spanking too?”

“Yep,” Raphael said and chuckled. “Leo, the curse police is onto ya!”

Leo smiled, broke apart from Mikey and said, “Finish your dinner, kids, and then it’s bath time and bed.”

The kids resumed eating and Raphael smiled lovingly at Leo, as Leo fed him another slice. It was so wonderful being upright instead of lying down on the stretcher and Raphael vowed that he’d spend as little time in bed, as possible, except when he’d recovered and could make love to Leo. Then they’d stay in bed all day and he’d mark and claim Leo and screw him senseless. He grinned at the idea.

“What are you thinking about?” Leo asked.

“Dirty things,” Raphael whispered. “Real dirty.”

“So you're a naughty boy,” Leo teased.

“Ya have no idea, baby.”

“I think I do! Do tell!”

“Do ya want an erection right here in front of our family?”

“No!” Leo said, blushing at the thought.

“Daddy, why are you red?” Kane asked, looking at his whispering parents. “Did you do something bad?”

“No, but he wants ta,” Raphael said with a smirk, getting questioning looks from Casey and April.

“Why does Daddy want to do something bad?” Leo jr asked in confusion.

“Sometimes bad things can be good,” Raphael said and winked at Leo senior, who blushed again.

“I don’t understand, Daddy.”

“I think it’s bath time!” Splinter said quickly, feeling flustered and understanding what Raphael meant. The kids were too young to know about sex and Splinter certainly didn't want to know anything. “Leonardo and Kane, follow me.”

“But, Grandpa, it’s not seven yet,” Leo jr whined.

“I said now!” Splinter said furiously, dark eyes flashing.

The kids reluctantly followed Splinter and Raphael chuckled at his mate’s discomfort, earning a scowl from him. “It’s not funny,” Leo said crossly. “You’re incorrigible, Raph.”

“I know, so when I’m better, ya can tie me up and spank me and plow me. I wanna be stuffed….”

“It’s time to leave!” Casey broke in, his own face as red as a beet. “We have things to do. Come on, Ape.”

“Ya wanna do naughty things ta April, huh?” Raphael said and smirked. “Have fun, pal. Ya always were a horn dog!”

“Raphael!” April said, trying to be mad, but failing. “He wanted to go, because he was picturing you tied up and Leo and you being intimate and it made him uncomfortable.”

“Oh. I didn’t realize he was such a prude. Hear that, Fearless? He’s a bigger prude than ya can be.”

Leo mumbled, “I’m sorry, April. Raph’s just…”

“Raph. I know. I’m going to go. I’ll catch you tomorrow. I’m so glad you’re regaining some feeling, Raph, but don't be too optimistic. It’s sometimes just momentary and I don’t want you to get your hopes up only to be disappointed.”

“It ain’t momentary, unlike yer fun with Casey,” Raphael said and smirked. “I’m gonna walk and me and Leo are gonna screw and go multiple rounds. Perks of bein’ a mutant, whereas Casey can only go one round and has ta rest.”

“TMI, Raphael!” April said and wrinkled her nose in disgust. “I so didn’t need to know that. Bye, guys. Call me if you need me.”

“We wouldn’t wanna disturb ya and Casey,” Raphael said and winked. April shook her head and left and Raphael laughed.

“You’re a pain in the shell,” Leo said irately. “I’m so embarrassed! How can I look them in the face again?”

Raphael rolled his eyes and said, “They acted prudish, but I bet they’re gonna be shaggin'soon. Ya could tell by their body language, so stop stressin’, baby!”

“Perhaps, but you didn’t have to be so open about what you wanted to do. You know I prefer being discreet.”

“I do know that and maybe I shouldn’t have been so vocal ‘bout it, but I’m excited, Leo. I got some feelin’ back, ya know, and I just can’t contain myself. I can’t wait ta…”

“Screw me. I know,” Leo said dryly.

“No. Firstly ta hug ya, kiss ya and cuddle with ya and ta feel ya against me. And then ta fuck…”

A loud sound of someone clearing their throat was heard and the brothers looked and saw Splinter gazing at them in disdain.

They were in for a lecture and the brothers mentally prepared themselves for it.

“I appreciate you’re mates,” Splinter began, his eyes stony. “But there are young children in this home and vulgarity and sexual talk isn’t suitable for young ears. Please refrain from being so vocal and keep it to your bedroom. I also don’t wish to hear it and neither do our friends. I heard some of the vulgarity, while I was bathing the children, and my ears burned. They asked me what screw was and tied up and I...How can I explain it to them? You should be ashamed of yourselves! Do I make myself clear?”

“Dad, we’re….” Raphael began.

“In love. I know, but the rest of us don’t need to hear the ins and outs, Raphael! I’m mortified.”

“Sorry, Dad,” Leo said, earning a withering glance from his mate. “It won’t happen again.”

“I should hope not! The children are nearly finished bathing and then you can come and say goodnight to them.”

Splinter stalked off and Raphael snapped, “Splinter junior!”

“Ninja wanna be,” Leo retorted.

“Suck up!”

“Hothead!”

“Fearless stick-in-the mud.”

“That’s a new one!”

“Well, our insults are pretty old, but honestly, Leo, why do ya always agree with Dad?”

“I don’t. You, yourself, said you shouldn’t have been so vocal.”

“True, but ya always listen ta Dad. Pisses me off.”

“I don’t.”

“Prove it.”

“Dad wanted to send you away to the Ancient one when you were twelve. He said he couldn’t deal with you anymore. You were out of control and he was at the end of his rope. I suppose he expected me to agree with him, because you and I had had some epic fights, but I didn’t. I went down onto my knees and pleaded for him not to send you, saying that you didn’t mean it and that you’d change and we needed you. I pleaded so hard, he changed his mind. I knew I loved you then and the thought of you leaving was unbearable, but I couldn’t tell him that, so I said we’d all be devastated and we would have. No matter what you do, you’re still our family, my world, my soulmate and my life.”

“I always wondered why he changed his mind. He told me he was sendin’ me away in the mornin’ and when I saw him in the afternoon, he said he wasn’t gonna.”

“Then there were the times you snuck out, despite being grounded.”

“Hah. I did that a lot.”

“I always covered for you, Raph, and lied to him about your whereabouts. When you returned, I took your punishments, remember? When Dad confiscated your porn and said it wasn’t allowed in the house, I retrieved them and gave you more porno magazines. When….”

“All right, so ya haven’t always listened ta him. I was wrong.”

Leo cupped Raphael’s cheek with a hand and said, “And of course our relationship. I always thought Dad would be against us becoming mates, but I still pursued you, because you were everything to me and I loved you. You were my universe, my heart and nothing made sense without you. If our love led to banishment, I didn’t care, as long as I was with you. I was glad Dad approved, but if he hadn’t, I’d have left with you and forged a new life elsewhere.”

“I know, Leo. I was wrong. Dad rubs me the wrong way sometimes. He still treats us like we’re kids, even though we have babies of our own and I hate it and sometimes the lair feels a little cramped, ya know? We don’t get much privacy. I love Dad, but ya know what I mean? He’s too involved in our lives.”

“Raph, we’re still kids ourselves and he means well, but I do understand. You want us to have more privacy. What if I knocked down some walls and added on extra rooms, fixing them up beautifully, so we could have our own place and still come and see Dad when we want and vice versa? We won’t be a million miles away, but we could do that. We’ll still have our meals with the family, but if we just want to be alone, we can leave the kids with Dad, Don and Mikey. I can make it look sensational. We could even have our own bathroom and kitchen and lounge and whatever you want.”

Raphael’s golden eyes lit up and he smiled. “I love that idea. Now that’s an even bigger incentive ta get better.”

“Yes, my love,” Leo said and kissed his cheek. “You do that. In the meantime, Donnie will make the lair more user friendly for you, like rails in the bathroom and so on.”

“Hey, Leo. Would ya wanna live elsewhere? I don’t mean in the sewers.”

“Like where?”

“I don’t know, but it’s damp and smelly and I’d love the kids ta live someplace decent.”

“Do you mean leave the family?”

“We could visit, but it’d be nicer than livin’ down here. I often think ‘bout that.”

“We’re loathed, Raph, and we’ll be never be accepted up there. It’s a lovely idea, but a pipe dream, my love. The best we can hope for is a better home down here. I’m sorry. I wish I could buy you what you wanted.”

“I have everythin’ I want, Leo. Ya and our babies. I was just talkin’ for the babies. They deserve a better life with fresh air and the warm sun on their faces, ya know? Not bein’ stuck down here.”

“I know, Raphie. Who knows? Maybe things will change one day, but….”

Splinter appeared and said, “The kids are asking for you.”

Leo nodded and said, “We’ll be there, Dad.”

xxxxx 

Raphael managed to manoeuvre his wheelchair and followed Leo to Leo jr’s bedroom. The kids were dressed in their pajamas and squealed excitedly when they saw their parents.

“Daddy,” Kane said, holding up a red book. “Will you read this to me?”

Leo and Raphael noticed it was one of the Noddy books and they smiled. The kids were hugely into Noddy and especially loved the Noddy song, which they’d beg their parents to sing.

“Sure will,” Raphael said. “Sit on my lap.”

The kids clambered onto Raphael’s lap, Leo held the book up to Raphael’s eyes and turned the pages, as Raphael read. The kids clapped in delight and Leo couldn’t wipe the grin off of his face. He’d missed this and he knew his mate had too.

After the fourth read, Leo said, “It’s time for bed.”

“Sing the song, Daddy!” Leo jr said.

Raphael nodded and sang it three times in his rich baritone.

Then Kane and Leo jr kissed him, he touched their faces with his left hand and said, “I love ya boys so much.”

“Love you too, Daddy!” the kids said sleepily in unison.

Leo helped them into bed, covered them with a blanket, kissed them and he and Raphael left.

“To the infirmary,” Leo said.

“No, Fearless,” Raphael said. “Ain’t gonna sleep in the infirmary. I wanna sleep in our bed with ya. I need ta be with ya and I won’t take no for an answer!”

Knowing it was pointless arguing, Leo went to their bedroom, followed by Raphael.

XXX

Baby Raphael was in his crib fast asleep and Leo and Raphael watched him, their hearts overflowing with love and pride. Leo picked up the sleeping baby and lowered him, so that Raphael could kiss him and touch his face. Then he kissed the baby and placed him in the cot.

Raphael sniffed and Leo said, “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

His eyes misty, Raphael nodded and said, “Yeah. Just feelin’ emotional. I loved readin’ ta the kids. I missed it and it was great havin’ dinner with everyone, like I used ta. Man, I was such a fool. I had it all and I…”

“That’s the past, my love,” Leo said and kissed his beak. “Let’s not dwell on it. Let’s focus on the now. Us and our love. I love you incredibly and I always will.”

“Yer so good ta me, Leo. I don’t deserve it.”

Leo peppered his face with tender kisses and said to a blushing Raphael, “You do, my angel. You deserve it and so much more. I wish you could see just how unbelievable you are and see yourself through my eyes.”

Raphael’s eyes shone with tears and he choked out, “I’m sorry for everythin’ I did, Leo. So, so sorry.”

Leo smothered him with kisses again and said, “Stop apologizing. It’s the past, Raphie, okay? All that matters is now and the future. Baby, please don’t cry.” He gently thumbed Raphael’s tears away and said, “I love you.”

“Love ya too,” Raphael said and looked adoringly into his eyes. “With every fiber of my bein’. I always will. Yer my first and my only love. I can’t imagine bein’ without ya. Ya light up my life, ya make me smile and I’d be a wreck without ya.”

“Me too. Let’s get you into bed.”

Leo gently lifted Raphael up into his strong arms and placed him into bed, taking care that his neck was supported by pillows. Then he changed him and covered him with the blanket.

“This is so much better than the infirmary,” Raphael said and sniffed the air. “The infirmary smells sterile and of soap, but here all I smell are our mixed scents and it’s more pleasant, ya know? I love yer scent. It’s intoxicatin’ and so….Ain’t ya gonna undress?”

Leo nodded, undressed, climbed into bed beside his mate, kissed him tenderly , closed his eyes and snuggled up to him.

“Hey, Leo. I’ve been thinkin’.”

“What?” Leo said sleepily.

“Look at me.”

Leo opened his eyes, looked at him and said, “What?”

"I want things ta really be different when I'm better.”

“I know. You want us to have our own place.”

“Not just that. I…I don’t wanna go bash Purple Dragons no more.”

Leo looked at him, like he’d grown a third head, and said, “How come? You love fighting.”

“Not as much as ya and yer always sick with worry when I go out and fight. It ain’t fair on ya. Yer stressed and ya don’t sleep and I just don’t wanna. I’d rather stay home with ya and our babies. That’s more fun and less dangerous.”

“But you love danger. You laugh in the face of it.”

“That was the old, reckless and selfish Raph, who did what he wanted and didn’t care what others thought. The new me wants ta stay home, Leo, and ta be a good mate and daddy. That’s all that matters ta me. Ya and our family. I don’t need bloodshed ta feel good. I have everythin’ I want at home.”

“Are you sure? What about being on the team?”

“I’ll fight if necessary, but otherwise no. I just wanna stay home.”

“You’ll grow bored and….”

“I could never grow bored of ya, Leo. I’ve made up my mind.”

“I don’t know what to say. I’ve wanted you to say that for so long and…”

“I’m serious, Leo. It’s part of growin’ up. I got a family and I’m bein’ selfish goin’ out and endangerin’ myself and …I wanna see them grow up and grow old with ya. I might not if I keep puttin’ myself in danger, I'm gonna stay home, even when I'm better. I wanna be a better cook and baker and play with the babies and just…I don’t wanna miss out on a thing. I wanna be a better mate. I’ve been a shitty one and… What do ya think?”

“I love you,” Leo said, his eyes brimming with happy tears. He raised himself on an elbow and tenderly kissed Raphael on the lips. He broke the kiss and said said, “You have no idea how much I worried.”

“I do know and there’s somethin’ else I’m positive ‘bout.”

“What, my love?”

“Another baby or two or four or however many the Great Bein’ wants us ta have. What do ya say?”

Leo looked at him in astonishment and said, “You were so dead set against it.”

“I changed my mind, Leo. I want more babies. My greatest achievements are ya and the kids and I’m serious. Are ya on board?”

“Yes, of course.”

Raphael smiled and said, “We'll have another bundle before the end of next year, Leo. That’s my promise ta ya. Ya know, all of this shit was a blessin’ in disguise. It’s made me grow up a hell of a lot and appreciate what I have. Love is precious, Leo, and I fucked up and lost it, but I ain’t never gonna do that again. Takara, yer quiet. Why?”

“Thinking.”

“Bout?”

“You. I promise I’ll make all your dreams a reality, Raphie. We'll leave the sewers if you want to.”

“My dreams have all been fulfilled, Leo, thanks ta ya, but I wouldn’t mind spendin’ time topside and I wouldn’t mind…It’s dumb.”

What, baby?”

“I’d love ta see Asia and see all of the places Dad talked ‘bout.”

“We’ll go, Raphie. I promise,” Leo said and kissed him on the lips.

“Any place ya wanna go?”

“Asia, but I don’t care if I never travel, because you’re more than enough. I don’t need to see anywhere else. All I need is you.”

“Sap,” Raphael teased and yawned. “Night, baby. I love ya.”

“Love you too,” Leo said and kissed him on the lips before lying down, closing his eyes and cuddling up to him.

Another baby will be fantastic, Raphael thought, as he closed his eyes. And I’m serious ‘bout what I told Leo. All I want and need are him and our babies. Rehab starts tomorrow and I’m gonna make progress fast. I can’t wait ta make love ta Leo and ta show him just how much I’ve missed bein’ with him. I’m gonna pound him real good too. Raphael grinned at the thought and soon fell fast asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thanks to all following and reading. and for the kudos.
> 
> Brennan and Tadgh are in the next chapter and Rachael Lawson returns too. 
> 
> My Mom would sing me the Noddy song when I was a kid. I'd always beg her to. :)


	36. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A daring escape occurs.

Brennan was dozing at eleven that day, August 3, when Gonzalez stopped by his cell and said, “I have news for you, Worthington. The DA has approved the evidence and you’re officially charged with murder, rape, attempted murder, illegal possession of weapons and the list is endless. You’re looking at the rest of your life behind bars if you don’t get the death penalty. I strongly suspect you’ll get the death sentence, but it’ll probably be years before you get the needle and you’ll mooch off of the tax payers until then. Pondscum like you always do. I’ll definitely be there when they inject you. The boys in San Quentin are going to love a pretty boy like you!”

“You can’t be fucking serious!” Brennan hissed, eyes flashing. “The DA fucking believes a mutant turtle, who won’t fucking show himself on camera! That’s crazy. Still, the jury will disregard it.”

“I wouldn’t bank on that. He’s agreed to testify in person and is credible. It doesn’t matter that he’s a mutant. He’s still a living, breathing being, whom you tortured! And he’s only a kid with a young family. The jury will pity and believe him. You’re going down, Worthington! You’ll be arraigned tomorrow and then taken to San Quentin to await trial.”

“I wouldn’t be so confident about that,” Brennan said and cracked his knuckles.

“What are you going to do? Break out of here? No chance. Not with guards and police dogs swarming around. I hope you have fun in jail and get all you deserve.”

“We’ll see about that. Do send my warmest regards to Raphael and his family,” Brennan said and turned his back on Gonzalez.

“One last thing. I have good friends in San Quentin and I’m going to ask them to ensure you get a suitable cell mate for a sleeze bucket like you,” Gonzalez said with a grin. “You’re going to wish you’d never been born. What a shame I can’t take photos or hear your screams. Ciao.”

So are you, Brennan thought. I’ll kill you and your family when I escape. That’ll be my first port of call. Then I’ll kill Raphael and his family.

“So there’s no chance of us getting out of here, Brennan?” Tadgh asked.

“Of course there is,” Brennan said and whispered an idea he had.

Tadgh beamed.

It would go down after lunch and Brennan had every confidence it would succeed.

XXX

Seated in the dining hall at lunch time, a little after noon, Brennan whispered to the barrel-chested, tattooed and tall Latino next to him, “I’m Brennan and that’s my friend, Tadgh.”

“Hi,” Tadgh said.

“Pleasure meeting you,” Hector said. “What are you in for?”

“Murder, rape and so on,” Brennan said. “You?”

“Murder. My ex’s new boyfriend. Sentenced to twenty years, but I won’t be here that long,” Hector said smugly. Lowering his tone, he added, “Getting out today. Want to be in on it?”

“Of course,” Brennan and Tadgh said in unison.

After glancing around and ensuring he wasn’t being watched by the guards, Hector fished a key out of his pocket, showed it to Brennan and Tadgh and placed it back in his pocket. “See this? I made it from memory. It’ll open every prison door. We got gym in twenty minutes and we can just run out of there to the fence and climb the ladder I left there when I was doing yard work yesterday. Piece of cake. One of my friends, who’s getting out on Friday, agreed to distract the guards by having an epileptic fit. He takes pills for it, but he didn’t this morning.”

“You’re a genius,” Brennan said. “I’m impressed.”

“Was nothing. The things you do for love, hey? I miss my ex so much and we’ll be reunited when I get out. Us and our four kids. I’ll show her I’ve changed and how much I love her. I did, you know. I never meant to hurt her. I didn’t know any better, having had a violent upbringing. But I found God when I came to prison a few months ago. I’ve changed and am a kinder man and less temperamental. I pray and I don’t drink, smoke or do drugs anymore. I want to go straight and live my life with my kids’ mom and just live a normal and quiet life. No more gangs either. My friends have fake ID’s and I’m going to take my family to the Marshall Islands. It doesn’t have an extradition treaty with the US and my ex always wanted to go there. I’ll hook you up with my pal to get you ID’s too if you like.”

“Thanks so much,” Brennan said.

“Appreciated,” Tadgh said.

“Got family?” Hector asked.

“A husband,” Tadgh said. “Miss him so much. Bastard hasn’t visited me since I got locked up. I wasn’t even guilty, you know. I was framed and he split. I can’t wait to see him again and tell him I miss him and woo him back. We were really good together.”

“Got an uncle,” Brennan said. “My favorite uncle. I want to see him. It’s been ages and we need to reconnect. I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to see me.”

“Here’s to family reunions,” Hector said with a smile. “I hope yours goes smoothly.

It sure will, Brennan thought and grinned. Raphael, you’d better say your prayers. I’m coming.

 

xxxx

The inmates filed into the gym twenty minutes later and true to his word, Hector’s friend complained that he was feeling sick fifteen minutes into the session. Moaning that his vison was blurry, his eyes rolled back in his head as his seizure began. His body convulsed as he stood frozen to the spot and he tried not to bite his tongue. Then he collapsed on the ground, his mouth frothing, as he continued convulsing, almost biting his tongue.

“Someone, help!” an inmate shouted.

The guards came running and immediately bent over the prone epileptic inmate, yelling into their walkie- talkies for help.

The guards distracted, Hector nodded at his pals and began to unlock the gym door.

The door swung open seconds later and Hector, Brennan and ten other inmates all made a beeline for the ladder. They swiftly climbed it and landed safely on the other side.

“Follow me,” Hector said. “To Harlem. I have some mates, who’ll give you what you need. Then we’ll go our separate ways.”

“Thanks, pal,” Brennan said gratefully.

XXXX

They arrived in Harlem and Brennan and Tadgh were introduced to Hector’s friends. “How long will the ID’s take?” Brennan asked.

“Couple of days,” a dark haired, eyed and muscular thug named Cruz said. “You can hang here with us until it’s ready. Nobody will look for you. The cops don’t really come out into this neck of the woods. They don’t give a shit about us poor folks. All they care about are the white and rich folk. My aunt was murdered last year. I’m still waiting for the cops to come and investigate! So what if she was a drug dealer’s wife. She was still a human being with a family. Four kids are motherless now and those boys in blue didn’t give a damn. I hate the fucking cops. Only reason Hector got nabbed was because he shot his ex’s boyfriend, who was a white dude and a lawyer and who worked in Manhattan! They cared about him. And my girlfriend was murdered. I’m raising my four-month-old on my own! The cops didn’t come here either. Nobody cares. We’re just filth and low life trash to them!”

“Ever thought about revenge?” Brennan asked.

“Sure, but if I do anything, I’d lose my daughter and she’s everything to me. I can’t lose her too. Anyway, make yourselves at home. I’ll be in the back making a head start on the ID’s. Hector, you going to stick around?”

“Nope. Looking for Maria. Know where she is?”

“Cometary in Manhattan. She was mowed down in a drive by last month. I’m sorry, pal.”

“The kids?” Hector asked sadly. “They’re okay, right?”

“Maria’s parents. I don’t know where. Maria moved back here after her boyfriend died and her parents split when after her funeral. I think they were given witness protection or something. I’m going in the back. I’m so sorry, Hec.”

“Fuck!” Hector yelled, his face darkening. “I’ll never see them again. Her parents never liked me!”

“Don’t be so sure,” Brennan said. “I can hack the police server and find their new identities. But I ask one thing in return.”

“Name it.”

“I want your help getting rid of Tadgh’s husband and family. They all ruined my life and Tadgh’s.”

“I thought you loved him,” Hector said, looking at Tadgh.

“Sure, but he lied and said I was abusive and am a murderer and I’m not. He ruined my life and Brennan’s, so he has to pay.”

“You’ll have my help,” Hector said. “But first find Maria’s parents. I want my kids.”

“You got it,” Brennan said, sitting down and booting up the laptop. He was a tech whiz and he’d soon bypass the security on the police server.

“Bingo,” he announced a few minutes later. “I’m in.”

Raphael, I can’t wait to finish what I started with you,” Brennan thought. “And neither can Tadgh. Enjoy your final moments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N I read about escape methods and the key method actually worked. Bizarre, but true.
> 
> Brennan's loose. Will that spell Raphael's end?
> 
> There's a prison next to the police station, which Hector and the other inmates were in.

**Author's Note:**

> Will Leo be able to forgive if he finds out?


End file.
